Shocked at my friend.

burlington6

UK0106 wrote: »

Nope. If anybody called me that, regardless of their race, I'd tell them I found it offensive and ask them not to do it in the future.

I only asked because it seems fine for the younger generation of black children to call each other by that name.

Joanthebone

Oh blimey! what a minefield! I am still wondering what the 'P' word is!!

summerspring

Joanthebone wrote: »

Oh blimey! what a minefield! I am still wondering what the 'P' word is!!

I missed that one, but I imagine the P word would be the short form of the word describing someone from Pakistan.

Joanthebone

Thanks Summerspring ... I try not to talk about or to anyone! its safer that way! :rotfl:

summerspring

Joanthebone wrote: »

Thanks Summerspring ... I try not to talk about or to anyone! its safer that way! :rotfl:

:rotfl: Yes I know what you mean. Can't open your mouth for fear of offending someone these days.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

I think the context in which a noun is used is the overall deciding factor on how offensive something is. I've only never heard 'darkie' used by an eighty two year old scowling about her new neighbours. She stopped using it once she became ill and those neighbours noticed she hadn't been up and about for a day, ending up with a booted in back door (repaired by the husband) and both looking after her once they had fetched the GP from the surgery in the next road. So that lady, even in her advanced years, was obviously well aware that it was offensive, as she made a point of never using it again.

Everybody learns new or alternative words & phrases throughout their life - if they're over 18, even 'mobile phone' is something they had to learn, never mind iPod, teletext, hatchback, jumbo jet, hovercraft or Concorde; somebody born before 1939 would have ended up learning things like blitzkreig, Holocaust, television, by 1899, motorcar, Germans, Titanic, aeroplane. To say that somebody just isn't capable of learning new words and adapting to changes in circumstance, society or technology is suggesting they are utter idiots (a word which itself has changed in meaning from its original medical term).


I feel strongly that people arguing that just because something was OK x number of years ago, they shouldn't be expected to tax themselves with making the effort to change are well aware of the word or phrase being offensive and are choosing to use it for that very reason, (Subtext: surely their need to be able to call somebody else exactly what they want and to Hell with their feelings is OK? Because they're more important than that person they are hurting, apparently).

AubreyMac

You won't know if a certain word/term is offensive to and individual until you a) say it and b) the person you say it to tells you they find it offensive.

Being unsure/confused at what might be offensive/acceptable is likely to make someone hesitate and not bother try at all and in turn cause more divide.

In social work speak, we use 'dual heritage' to describe someone whose parents are of different ethnicities instead of 'mixed race'.

One of my colleagues who is half black and half white just calls herself black and I'm not sure why. Barack Obama is often referred to as the first black president but he is just as much white as he is black.

People describe me wrongly all the time and just brush it off as 'they all look the same'. Yeah, to the untrained eye and at a glance Asians probably do look the same. I think white men in uniform/suits all look the same in the city rush hour. But to me that's no more justification to being ignorant (for want of a better word) than not moving with the times regarding terminology.

Pollycat

AubreyMac wrote: »

You won't know if a certain word/term is offensive to and individual until you a) say it and b) the person you say it to tells you they find it offensive.

I agree with this.

It's clear from this thread that a word that offends one person doesn't offend another.

FredG

I come from a mixed race family and I've always found 'coloured' to be the most annoying, wishy-washy term used by numbskulls to avoid saying 'black' like it's a crime for a person to be so.


That being said, I've never been offended by it. Sometimes it's just someone's in built ignorance being projected. You can't blame a person for their upbringing or their past exposure, you can only educate them.


As I am incredibly white however, it's funny that people who don't know me very well will express blatantly racist and xenophobic views and await my agreement. They end up with a bit of a shock.

Pollycat

Was watching Prime Suspect last night (series 4 called 'Inner Circles', from 1995) and one of the characters (admittedly a bit of a prententious pillock) referred to one of the investigating offcers as 'that coloured policeman'.