Mother is going to leave a 40 year marriage with nothing

missbiggles1

pollypenny wrote: »

Over my dead body would he get away with that.

He could pay off her mortgage at the very least, but please encourage her to take legal advice.

If she's nearly 65 she might not be able to work for long and she needs to think about her pension. She will be entitled to some of his pension.

I think the pension may well be more important than the property.

PasturesNew

How much is the foreign property worth, full open market value?
£20k?
£200k?
£2million?

Prothet_of_Doom

I would dispute that she has nothing to show for it.

Whatever financial the imbalance of the split, she seems to have got something very valuable that your father hasn't got so much of. And that is your love and respect. How proud must she be to know she'd brought someone up who will fight for what is right. I suggest you talk to your father, and try and shame him into doing the right thing.

iammumtoone

lincroft1710 wrote: »

That's when the lawyers start arguing.

It may be financially advantageous for the father not to get divorced.

But what if only one party has a lawyer and the other refuses/can't afford one? Could a divorce still go through with just one person implementing it and the other refusing to co-operate?

sorry I don't meant to come across as argumentative, I am just genuinely interested what would happen in this situation.

VfM4meplse

Op, your father sounds quite charming. His current partner should be worried.

missbiggles1

iammumtoone wrote: »

But what if only one party has a lawyer and the other refuses/can't afford one? Could a divorce still go through with just one person implementing it and the other refusing to co-operate?

sorry I don't meant to come across as argumentative, I am just genuinely interested what would happen in this situation.

You don't need a solicitor for divorce unless there is property/money to sort out.

From https://www.gov.uk/divorce/grounds-for-divorce

Grounds for divorce
"You have lived apart for more than 5 years
Living apart for more than 5 years is usually enough to get a divorce, even if your husband or wife disagrees with the divorce."

benjus

missbiggles1 wrote: »

You don't need a solicitor for divorce unless there is property/money to sort out.

From https://www.gov.uk/divorce/grounds-for-divorce

Grounds for divorce
"You have lived apart for more than 5 years
Living apart for more than 5 years is usually enough to get a divorce, even if your husband or wife disagrees with the divorce."

You don't need a solicitor for divorce full stop. It's perfectly possible to go to a Financial Dispute Resolution hearing or even a full financial dispute trial as a litigant in person. It may not go well if you're up against a good experienced lawyer - but at the end of the day it's the judge's opinion that matters, and a judge may well make allowances for someone forced to self represent against an expensive lawyer. Since legal aid for private family law matters was abolished judges are getting increasingly accustomed to dealing with litigants in person.

Anyway we seem to be getting ahead of ourselves here as the husband appears to want to start proceedings abroad, and we have no idea how the law works there. If I were the OP I'd be advising my mother to insist on doing it through English courts, but she doesn't appear to want to fight for her rights.

Trek_girl

Prothet_of_Doom wrote: »

I would dispute that she has nothing to show for it.

Whatever financial the imbalance of the split, she seems to have got something very valuable that your father hasn't got so much of. And that is your love and respect. How proud must she be to know she'd brought someone up who will fight for what is right. I suggest you talk to your father, and try and shame him into doing the right thing.

Thank you. That is very kind.

benjus

If she does decide just to sign the papers her husband has asked her to sign, and if those papers are from the foreign jurisdiction, she should at least figure out beforehand what impact that will have on her legal status here. Being legally divorced in one country but still legally married in your home country is not a situation I'd want to be in.

gingercordial

Bear in mind that under English law (no idea about South African therefore professional advice is needed!) there are two distinct elements to divorce.

1. The legal divorce itself, ie the ending of the marriage. This enables the parties to go and get married again if they like. This can be done by one party without the other's agreement after five years from the date of separation. If it has been more than five years the mother here can't stop it if the father wants a divorce so he can remarry. She has no position of power to use at this stage. But again, SA law may be very different.

2. The financial settlement. It is perfectly possible to get divorced and not deal with the financial aspects. Indeed some couples don't do this bit (or don't do it properly) and then later on one of them becomes wealthy and the other can still file a claim.

So under English law the father could push through a divorce after five years without the mother being able to do anything about it, and the finances wouldn't necessarily come into it.