Paying for accomodation at the reception

Spendless

There was a thread recently from a lady whose relative ad done exactly this and she wasn't happy that pressure was being put on her to stay overnight, as she had two teenagers so that meant double the cost to her household and she only lived about 14 miles from the venue.

Personally I'd drop the idea and look for a different venue if it's exclusive use you want.

Pollycat

Spendless wrote: »

There was a thread recently from a lady whose relative ad done exactly this and she wasn't happy that pressure was being put on her to stay overnight, as she had two teenagers so that meant double the cost to her household and she only lived about 14 miles from the venue.

Personally I'd drop the idea and look for a different venue if it's exclusive use you want.

I remember that thread.

I hope the OP comes back & answers all the questions asked and comments on the very good points made.

Whatever happened to getting married at your local church, having your reception at the local pub, church hall, Miners' Welfare or Working Mens Club & having your honeymoon in Scarborough?

tara747

The simple answer is: pay for all the rooms if you want exclusive use, or don't.

Don't ask your guests to pay.

amistupid

When I read about 'problems' like this I'm grateful we didn't have a wedding do. Nowadays the bride's big day seems ridiculously expensive, not only for them but also for their invited guests.

Pollycat

amistupid wrote: »

When I read about 'problems' like this I'm grateful we didn't have a wedding do. Nowadays the bride's big day seems ridiculously expensive, not only for them but also for their invited guests.

Yep.
If none of the OP's guests take up the offer of paying £75 per room (which doesn't sounds that expensive to me really), they are looking at paying out not far off £4k before they even feed & water the guests - not to mention the hire of the venue itself, cars, clothes, flowers etc.......:eek:

fierystormcloud

Pollycat wrote: »

Yep.
If none of the OP's guests take up the offer of paying £75 per room (which doesn't sounds that expensive to me really), they are looking at paying out not far off £4k before they even feed & water the guests - not to mention the hire of the venue itself, cars, clothes, flowers etc.......:eek:

Well some people would think £75 is a lot, especially if it only covers one person or two, and it's family of 4 going, so they have to fork out £150 for the overnight stay. And especially after having to pay for travel and outfits and gifts/money for the bride and groom.

I think it's a cheek, and I would not be paying to stay. If the venue was close enough to get a taxi, I would do that; if it was say, 50-60 miles away or more, I probably wouldn't go. I have better things to do with my money than spend it on other people's expensive desires and wishes. Bridezillas (and groomzillas) do my head in.

TBagpuss

I agree with previous posters saying that there is not really a good way to do this.

I think you either decide that having this venue, and exclusive use is so important to you that you book it and make savings else where, or you book what you need - maybe rooms for yourselves and for people such as your paretns, who you presumably are close enough to to ask them at this stage if they want to stay.

Then let your guests know that rooms are available but not reserved.

Anything else is going to be really awkward for your guests who may feel uncomfortable about saying no.

I'm struggling to understand why you would need exclusive occupation of the entire hotel? Surely you will have sole use of the function room or wherever you are having your actual reception in any event - why would you want/need more than that?

If having no one else on the premises is a must have for you then I would suggest that you look for a different venue with fewer rooms and/or a different policy.

Pollycat

fierystormcloud wrote: »

Well some people would think £75 is a lot, especially if it only covers one person or two, and it's family of 4 going, so they have to fork out £150 for the overnight stay. And especially after having to pay for travel and outfits and gifts/money for the bride and groom.

That's why I said:

Pollycat wrote: »

If none of the OP's guests take up the offer of paying £75 per room (which doesn't sounds that expensive to me really)

I do appreciate other people may have a different opinion.
£75 per room - for 2 guests, that would be me & my other half (not talking about single people here or families of 4 because we're not) including breakfast seems to me reasonable considering how much a stay in a country hotel might cost.

fierystormcloud wrote: »

I think it's a cheek, and I would not be paying to stay. If the venue was close enough to get a taxi, I would do that; if it was say, 50-60 miles away or more, I probably wouldn't go. I have better things to do with my money than spend it on other people's expensive desires and wishes. Bridezillas (and groomzillas) do my head in.

I too think it's a cheek and unless it was a very close relative or very close friend, I'd probably decline too.

fierystormcloud

Fair enough Pollycat.

Pollycat

Oh - and fierystormcloud - I do agree with you about bride-and-groomzillas.

I've read so many threads on here (never ventured onto the wedding board :eek:) about pressure put on people to attend ludicrously expensive stag/hen parties and weddings in far flung places that I'm glad that I only have a very small family and the next wedding is not likely to be within the next 5 years.
All my friends are married so I think I'm safe there too. :rotfl: