Charging rent to someone who is back with parents due to illness

Dark_elf

This recently shocked me. Someone I know was schizophrenic and had had to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital. They were living independently before in a shared house before having a breakdown. They went back to live with their parents for four months to get back on their feet.

The parents then said he needed to pay £50 per week to cover food and electricity.

He still had to pay the bills and rent at his old place. He was on sickness pay and went back to work after he recovered. He was back at his parents for four months.

How much does it really cost in terms of expenses to have an extra person at home?
*Two extra laundry washes per week (or just add clothes to an existing wash)
An extra TV on
* Heating in spare bedroom on more (but you would have heat on anyway to prevent damp/ mould)
* Food, an extra couple of potatoes or an extra couple of chicken pieces

I don't think this adds up to £200 a month.
I was shocked and think that this was beyond greedy.

I am certain that if I were a parent in this position I would absorb any extra cost so as not to cause the person extra stress because of finances.

They recently reminded him 'you still owe us £500'

What is your opinion of this?

DKLS

Your friend should pay what he owes.

Indie_Kid

I think it's fair enough. You also forgot things like gas, electricity, water, etc.

Flyonthewall

As it was for medical reasons I think it's a bit unfair, especially as they must be aware they are on sick pay and have another place to pay for. It's certainly not fair if they offered for them to move back and then after moving sprung that on them.

If it were for long term it would also be different, but 4 months isn't that long.

I guess it also depends on how well off the parents are. If they're really struggling then they may need the money, although whether they really need as much as £50 is debatable.

If it were by choice (e.g. coming back after uni or inbetween moving houses) it would be different. However, in this case their first thoughts should be helping out their son and making sure he is healthy, not making him pay and then remdinding him of what they believe he owes.

Dark_elf

DKLS wrote: »

Your friend should pay what he owes.

He is going to pay, - he is trying to get back on his feet financially - he paid them £100 already which is when he told me about this.

I suppose my question is 'is this fair and reasonable to you to charge in these circumstances' and what amount would cover extra expenses.

Dark_elf

Flyonthewall wrote: »

I guess it also depends on how well off the parents are. If they're really struggling then they may need the money, although whether they really need as much as £50 is debatable.

I don't know their circumstances but they have just gone on a cruise (Europe) so they do have some cash to spare and spend on themselves it seems and are not pawning their coats to buy an extra loaf of bread for their son.

Flyonthewall

Dark_elf wrote: »

He is going to pay, - he is trying to get back on his feet financially - he paid them £100 already which is when he told me about this.

I suppose my question is 'is this fair and reasonable to you to charge in these circumstances' and what amount would cover extra expenses.

I think it depends. If they eat a lot, have loads of electronics on all the time, have the heat up high all day and so on, the costs are obviously going to be higher. If they're eating the same meals at the same time then costs for food won't really be any higher.

I think that the amount should be agreed to beforehand and it's up to the people involved to decide and agree on how much it should be.

BigAunty

Are the parents on benefits? I know from browsing the benefit forum that some low income parents can get clobbered with a steep loss of Housing Benefit and council tax reduction when they have an adult child living with them. It's known as 'non-dependent deductions' and there are lots of exemptions and differences in calculating it, depending on the type of benefits both parties are on, the income of the non-dependent, etc.

I know my parents wouldn't dream of charging me anything if I had to recover from illness at theirs. They scarcely took anything off me when I was earning and healthy.

Nonetheless, £50 a week for household expenses is generally a good deal for a live in lodger (though I appreciate your friend was very stretched with a dip in income and expenses from having to maintain the other property and was sick, so the context is different).

"Food, an extra couple of potatoes or an extra couple of chicken pieces".

Well that meal would probably only cost £2 in that partial summary you gave but a person will generally eat 3 meals plus snacks and drinks a day. It must be quite easy to spend £30 a week on food per person. I know on MSE people are proud of producing meals for less than a pound a head but the average person will spend much more than a tenner a week on food.

So in summary, no I don't think its nice of them to charge him anything for his stay but it might be a bit more forgiveable if they were on a low income. If he wasn't ill, £50 per week in houshold keep sounds a good baseline for household expenses if it includes food.

Flyonthewall

Dark_elf wrote: »

I don't know their circumstances but they have just gone on a cruise (Europe) so they do have some cash to spare and spend on themselves it seems and are not pawning their coats to buy an extra loaf of bread for their son.

It's possible they saved up for many years to do so. It's their money, they deserve to be able to spend it on something they want. However, if they don't need it then it seems sad if they start to pressure him for it by keep reminding him, especially as he has started paying them back.

I would hope that most parents concern is for their health, not the money.

Dark_elf

They just told him 'we want X amoun't and he said 'Ok'. He did not think he would be able to cope living alone with strangers fresh from hospital so he went to his parents home.

Personally I feel to charge him is money grabbing and cold-hearted, but from some responses here it seems that some people do feel it is reasonable to charge which is what I wanted to find out. .

Dark_elf

BigAunty wrote: »

Are the parents on benefits? I know from browsing the benefit forum that some low income parents can get clobbered with a steep loss of Housing Benefit and council tax reduction when they have an adult child living with them. It's known as 'non-dependent deductions' and there are lots of exemptions and differences in calculating it, depending on the type of benefits both parties are on, the income of the non-dependent, etc.
.

No, they both work.

BigAunty wrote: »

"Food, an extra couple of potatoes or an extra couple of chicken pieces".

Well that meal would probably only cost £2 in that partial summary you gave but a person will generally eat 3 meals plus snacks and drinks a day. It must be quite easy to spend £30 a week on food per person. I know on MSE people are proud of producing meals for less than a pound a head but the average person will spend much more than a tenner a week on food.

So in summary, no I don't think its nice of them to charge him anything for his stay but it might be a bit more forgiveable if they were on a low income. If he wasn't ill, £50 per week in houshold keep sounds a good baseline for household expenses if it includes food.

I know personally that when my sister visited me for a couple of weeks, all I had do get extra were extra milk and the type of cereal she likes. £2 per week tops. I just added an extra handfull of rice/pasta and had a slightly smaller helping of the bolognese whatever. I did not notice anything different in my bills at all for those two weeks.