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Money Moral Dilemma: Is it OK to borrow from my kid's piggy bank?
Comments
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If you ask for money and it is given to you as a loan, that's okay. If you take money from anyone without asking, that's theft. You have taught your child that it's acceptable to take money from other people's purses/wallets/piggy banks.0
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If my kids have money for more than 30 second it burns a hole in there pockets.........Nothing to see here, move along.0
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No, it is not alright. If they 'borrowed' from your purse or wallet you would call it stealing!
It is their money, you took it without asking, you have not paid it back and that you left iou suggests you couldn't or did not plan to!0 -
Happened to me when I was about 7, but without explanation or IOUs. My young mind interpreted it as, 'I am required to support the family financially'. In the ensuing years, directly and indirectly, the message was reinforced.
Many of my early choices were made with this role in mind; school and university options taken based on 'sensible' rather than 'actually enjoy', contributing to a mostly unfulfilling and ultimately pretty mediocre work life. For a long time I felt whatever I did manage to build up would ultimately be taken away to support the family. Realistic? Not completely. Martyrish? Oh yes. But the way you cope when you're young has an effect beyond logic and takes a great deal of unpicking.
So, should you take the money? Well, if you really must, then sit the poor kid down and explain why first. Give them some control. Pay it back when you say you will. Especially if they're a bit sensitive and your household is a bit chaotic to start with. Losing trust in your caregivers is a recipe for later life issues.
If you don't fancy having that sort of conversation or being that kind of parent generally, then find the cash from somewhere else. I strongly suggest the latter option, to be on the safe side.0
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