Charging wedding guests, yes or no?

TBagpuss

I think you can say to people "We have booked this house - there are x rooms available at £x per room, let us know if you would like to stay here" but only if you can affod it of people chose other options.

With immediate family you can ask them "If we did this, would you be interested?" If you get 5 or 6 couples who say they like the idea then you can go ahead.

But do consider: If people are staying on the premises *and* you are doing all of your own decor and catering, they may feel compelled to help. and all that prep takes a lot of time and effort.

Plan ahead to ensure that your guests don't feel pushed into doing this.

It might be worth looking at other options.

My sister got married 2 years ago. She and BIL wanted to keep things on a reasonable budget.

She rented the village hall for the reception. She rented it for the evening before the wedding and most of the next day.
The day before , we (bride & groom, Parents of the Bride, plus her sisters, brother and heir partners, all of whom were staying at my parents home) went down to the hall to set up the tables and do the decor. B&G had bought banqueting roll which we used on the tables (with v.cheap gauze as runners to make it look more festive) and we also used the banqueting roll to cover the various notice boards in the hall, so we didn't have Scout & WI notices in all the pictures)

The hall had lots of cutlery, and we hired glasses from Tesco.

Catering was done by a local woman - cold meats, quiches, salads etc as a buffet with servers. The lady who did the catering arranged for 3 or 4 students to come to help with serving, clearing the plates and handing round champagne and canapes when people first arrived. I can't remember whether she supplied the crockery - that may have been hired too, I know we didn't do the washing up!

After the reception we (wedding party excluding B&G) cleared up - some lingering guests offered to help and as it was all family we accepted, and we were able to come back (with B&G) the following morning to do the final bits, by agreement with the Hall (as it wasn't needed until the following evening, so they agreed that we didn't have to return the keys until mid day even though it was officially only hired until the night of the wedding)

It pays to have local connections: the wedding was in the village my parents live in, and my mum was able to agree more flexible terms than a stranger would have got.

When my neighbour got married she had her reception in a local school hall. the food was a buffet and the B&G, and their immediate family who lived local to the venue had prepared the food themselves - in their case, thy had a very small registry office with immediate family only then a reception and personal ceremony (including step kids) at the hall, followed by the food.

kaggi

I think £50 per head is fine, providing you have enough people who would be interested in staying. However, if people feel coerced into saying whether they will stay when accepting the invitation it may cause bad feeling, or they may not come. I just think it would leave a bad taste in guests mouths. I was married in the back garden by a minister and then it was off to the village hall that had been decorated b friends and 9 years later I still have people telling me it was the best wedding they have been too. Have a great day whatever you decide to do.

Tigsteroonie

andyandnico wrote: »

1. £50 a head.
2. It doesn't even cover half the sot of the venue.
3. These are *close* friends and family, who, you know, like us.

Irrelevant, I know but ...

If these are close friends and family who, you know, like you - why are you asking for opinions on an internet forum? Why not just ask them what they think?

Floss

andyandnico wrote: »

...I have been looking at other options, but of course with such a small group village halls, etc, are too big...

Perhaps your perception of a village hall is somewhat incorrect - most would be a comfortable venue space for 50 guests and in fact we were guests at a village hall wedding reception near Thirsk a few years ago that was just the right size for their 54 guests, had recently been rebuilt as a millenium project and was immaculate.

BTW, be aware that if anyone else will be contributing towards the cost of your wedding, it may end up as more than 50 guests

arbrighton

Floss wrote: »

Perhaps your perception of a village hall is somewhat incorrect - most would be a comfortable venue space for 50 guests and in fact we were guests at a village hall wedding reception near Thirsk a few years ago that was just the right size for their 54 guests, had recently been rebuilt as a millenium project and was immaculate.

BTW, be aware that if anyone else will be contributing towards the cost of your wedding, it may end up as more than 50 guests

We were in somerset for our honeymoon, and their 'community hall' was a restored tithe barn. Would have been perfect for around fifty.

minerva_windsong

Floss wrote: »

Perhaps your perception of a village hall is somewhat incorrect - most would be a comfortable venue space for 50 guests and in fact we were guests at a village hall wedding reception near Thirsk a few years ago that was just the right size for their 54 guests, had recently been rebuilt as a millenium project and was immaculate.

BTW, be aware that if anyone else will be contributing towards the cost of your wedding, it may end up as more than 50 guests

The hall my parents had their ruby wedding anniversary party in a couple of months ago takes around 120 people depending how you set it up/how big you want your dance floor to be. Obviously your mileage may vary depending on your local area but even fairly rural parts of the country will quite often have a pretty big village hall within reasonable driving distance.

firebird082

minerva_windsong wrote: »

The hall my parents had their ruby wedding anniversary party in a couple of months ago takes around 120 people depending how you set it up/how big you want your dance floor to be. Obviously your mileage may vary depending on your local area but even fairly rural parts of the country will quite often have a pretty big village hall within reasonable driving distance.

Good point - we had trouble finding a local village hall that would fit all 80/90 of our guests - most were more suited to 50/60.

inkie

Also look at the idea of restaurants - a number of them offer 'private dining' for smaller events....

If money is an issue, I would be waiting until I could afford it.

mrsdee

Love the private dining option. Also - if in the summertime, what about having a wedding party outside in a garden - yours or a garden of a friend or relative with caterers? That way you don't have to worry about venue hire at all for a small-ish group of people. Have a contingency plan (gazebos etc) in garden if needed for bad weather. We did this in our garden and it was a) a bargain and b) we had lovely local caterer ladies who did everything including all the clearing up and we had a completely stress free evening. We just made it clear there was a definite finish time and we supplied the alcohol (on sale or return, so no money wasted). our friends decorated the garden with balloons etc. It was very chilled and very relaxed.

pickledonionspaceraider

Charging guests? A great way to end up with no people turning up, IMO