I am in a mess and don't know what to do

enthusiasticsaver

Can you move any of the cards on to 0% deals? You would normally start clearing the one with the highest interest rate first by paying minimum payment on others and throwing everything you can spare to that one.


Do you need two cars if you no longer work or do you need that because of your health?


You have admitted the spending is psychological because of depression and well done for cutting up the cards. The next thing is to find something else to focus on when you are feeling depressed. Do you have a good friend or someone you can talk to if you really cannot tell your OH? The weight and worry of the debt is no doubt adding to your depression so sharing that may help.


Finally although it looks like a mountain to you, £20k is by no means the largest amount of debt to deal with so you can do it but it would be easier with your partners' help. Incidentally what are you spending on? Has your partner not noticed lots of new purchases?

[Deleted User]

I still need my car for health issues. Both cars are fully paid for, no finance on them.
I spend on items for my hobbies, lunch when I am out but alot if it just disappears with nothing to show for it.
Oh never looks at bank statement. He trusts me

[Deleted User]

Sat here trying to work out how to cut back on items. Going to look back through receipts in my handbag and work out what I spend in the supermarket

amorge

Keep a spending diary; even if only on your phone. I stopped taking my purse out with me when walking into town, just take enough for a coffee and nothing else, that way I'm not tempted.

amorge

and what about doing online surveys? They can be quite time consuming but if you're at home a lot it might be worth it

19lottie82

do you and your OH have any joint finances (bills? bank accounts?) if so you HAVE to discuss this with your partner. IF you don't it's not fair on him and you're just sticking your head in the sand. Sorry, but that's the truth.

joeblags

£300'000 house but only a mortgage of £506 a month? im just randomly reading around and this thread confused me. I have a bigger monthly wage and the most mortgage I could get if I ever wanted wouldn't be much more than £100'00

[Deleted User]

19lottie82 wrote: »

do you and your OH have any joint finances (bills? bank accounts?) if so you HAVE to discuss this with your partner. IF you don't it's not fair on him and you're just sticking your head in the sand. Sorry, but that's the truth.

As said previously it is not going to be discussed with oh

[Deleted User]

joeblags wrote: »

£300'000 house but only a mortgage of £506 a month? im just randomly reading around and this thread confused me. I have a bigger monthly wage and the most mortgage I could get if I ever wanted wouldn't be much more than £100'00

The house was new when we bought it 15yrs since and the cost was £123995. Our mortgage was £98000. We have an offset mortgage and this is now the figure outstanding.

Fireflyaway

You have acknowledged you have a problem which is a big step. Many people just ignore the debt but you want to tackle it so good on you!

I would start by getting rid of the spending temptation. Get rid of the cards and don't borrow. Then get spending money out each week / fortnight or month and put it in an envelope. That's your spending money and what you have to stick to. Once its gone its gone and you have to wait for the next one.
Next I would speak to your creditors and negotiate a repayment plan if you can. They might stop the interest and allow a fixed sum each month. You need some money left over. If you feel skint all the time you will get fed up and probably go and overspend at some point. Be aware it will negatively impact your credit rating but that might be worth it for peace of mind, knowing you can afford your debts and they won't be getting any bigger and at a certain point they will be gone.
I have a lot more debt than you and that's what I did. The weight off my mind knowing I had discussed it with my creditors and come to an arrangement was great.