How Do I Support Him?

Savvy_Sue

Love and hugs to you Moggins, I am glad you have managed to start talking. FWIW, I don't think men EVER talk about what's worrying us / them as much as we would like them to ...

chris73

Speaking from experience, and having suffered work related stress myself (To the point where I Just 'Woke Up' driving down the M6 at 3AM with no idea how / why I was there), I can sympathise with the symptoms which you describe in your husband. People, sadly just associate the word 'stress' with being a little tired or run down, but in reality it can ruin and take over your life, make you more subsceptable to illness and even bring about a premature death.

I would say that your husband is doing the right thing, for his own sanity and his family at least. Who cares, if he goes from a high paying Job to a lower paying one?, I am sure that you can adapt to the reduced income and adjust your lifestyle accordingly?, other families manage everyday on surprisingly little income. Sorry I don't mean to sound harsh, just expressing fact.

What you can't do, is to put a price tag on happiness and wellbeing, your health is worth a fortune, and so is your husbands.

Rik_3

He should see the doctor for sure - not for the drugs, but to get signed off work. A close friend of mine suffered from work-related-stress, firm saw little reason to do anything about it or recongnise its seriousness. Doctor signed him off for 6 weeks, then signed another 6 weeks. During the 2nd period the firms HR finally got the message and fixed the problems at work. He then went back and everything quickly went back to normal.
It may be the same case for your husband - get some deserved time off - a good batch of it, that will wake up these shoddy employers, he deserves the support at work for the job he does, milk them for a couple of months at least.
Rik.

chris73

Agree with Rik. Try and avoid him taking medication unless it is a serious level of depression. Drugs only mask and dull a problem such as this, they don't solve it. The only way your husband can start to recover from this is to seperate himself from the actual root cause of the stress. Ultimately, if his employer is not willing to assist in this, then the only way of doing this successfully is to change employers and Job.

I recognised the need to get out of the place, when I realised that I was turning into a person that I didn't like very much. I'm now working in a different field of employment and getting paid less. True, I am still not 100% happy where I am at the moment, but there is little stress, I have recovered from my previous stress related issues and am 'happier' within myself, and this alone makes up for the less comfortable level of income.

Sorry, I don't have all of the answers and I am no expert, but I do recognise the signs, suffered from them, and have now recovered. I would suggest that your husband gets some time off work, and uses it to decide what route he needs to take next.