Advice needed for difficult situation

anonymous754

Hi All,
I'd appreciate some advice for a very difficult situation I find myself in. I'm in my early 30s, and work for a large organisation in the UK. The problem concerns my parents, who are very controlling, and have influence within this organisation. The problems have been going on for a long time, but really got worse when I moved out of home last year, and all hell broke loose.

I have been bullied almost constantly at work, have lost all my friends and family, and have been cut off from any professional opportunities or networks. I've been the subject of smear campaigns, had my phone and internet use monitored, and have been shunned by my neighbours. Any prospects in my chosen career seem to be dead, as it seems that all other employers in my industry have been put off, and I'm unable to move jobs.

My parents' main aim seems to be to prevent me from meeting a partner, and from having a career. Great efforts have been made to suggest that I am gay, which I am not, and they have also tried to force me into a relationship with a woman at work, which I didn't want. I also think they want me to move back home, and basically write off any future I may have had. They are very powerful and well-connected, and seem to have an amazing ability to recruit others to their cause.

I really don't know what to do now, as I don't seem to have any good options. I have no support network, no contacts, and nowhere to turn. An option I'm considering is moving to the other end of the country and then trying to find work, but I don't know how wise that would be. I do have savings, and a good level of education, but I worry that my parents/employers influence could lead to me not being able to find anything. I've also looked at opportunities abroad, but that seems difficult unless you have medical/engineering qualifications, which I don't.

Does anyone have any advice for how I can move forward from this? Speaking to my parents is pointless as they just deny everything. I've come close to suicide from this, though I'm doing ok at the moment, which is frankly a miracle considering everything I've been through.

Many thanks for any advice.

elsien

anonymous754 wrote: »

Hi All,

I have been bullied almost constantly at work, have lost all my friends and family, and have been cut off from any professional opportunities or networks. I've been the subject of smear campaigns, had my phone and internet use monitored, and have been shunned by my neighbours. Any prospects in my chosen career seem to be dead, as it seems that all other employers in my industry have been put off, and I'm unable to move jobs.

Without wanting to cause offence, you seem to be ascribing an awful lot of power to your parents that to an impartial outsider seems to be very unlikely. Do you think it's possible that your perceptions of the situation could be skewed and this is something you might want to look at/get some help with?

anonymous754

It may seem unlikely but I can assure you it's happening, and my perceptions are just fine. I've seen all of these things with my own eyes and lived through them on a daily basis.

Gloomendoom

Have you considered joining one of the armed services? I doubt your parents would hold much sway there.

McKneff

Why don't you just get your self out of the situation and set off for Australia.


No one can bully you without your consent.


They will treat you how you allow them to treat you.....

anonymous754

I have looked into joining the RAF but am ruled out due to health problems, and I assume would also be from the Army and Navy.

dragonette

Look at getting a job that they do not have influence over? Tell them to stop interfering or you will cut contact?

Kaye1

I am genuinely not being flippant- go into catering!
A lot of places will give you accommodation as part of the job, a lot of places are usually short staffed. Even if you can't cook, lots of places are looking for kitchen porters, front of house etc.
Use some of your savings to move to another part of the country/world. Leave social media. Set up a postal re-direction.
Ok, it won't be the best job in the world, but it will give you an opportunity to 'tread water,' without spending your savings. You can then use the time to decide what you want to do and get away from the situation you are in. If you are willing to graft, you will be snapped up.

anonymous754

I have cut contact but that doesn't seem to have stopped them unfortunately. Does anyone have thoughts about the wisdom of moving somewhere with a good jobs market, paying six months' rent in advance for a house share and then trying to find work? There's nothing keeping me here...

gettingtheresometime

Change your name,secure a new job - however menial - on the opposite side of the country and move without telling them.

Send them your sim card and buy a new one in your name

LilElvis

Phones monitored? - get your own contract. Ditto broadband. Get Gmail, Hotmail or similar email address. Shunned by neighbours? - move.

Start taking "ownership" of your life and it will give you the strength to make the next step to total independence and freedom.