Surrounded by "Big spenders"

quantic

Sometimes I feel surrounded by people who live faux celebrity lifestyles all funded by interest only mortgages, balloon payment cars and credit cards.

We don't spend much as a family, we have quite modest tastes, buy food in Aldi, drive a 7 year old car and try to save a proportion of our wages. We come from a "lower/middle class" background (if there is such a thing).

The daft thing is, a lot of the people I know are on the absolute bones of their a*rses, one small unexpected expense and it would be curtains. But to the outside they are high flyers who have it all. Is it just me or do you guys feel pressure occasionally from being surrounded by this?

Sapphire

Money and all the 'celebrity accoutrements' are what matters to much of Western society today. I think many of us are far more materialistic than we used to be, and have a far greater sense of entitlement. 'Keeping up with the Jones' is like an addiction to many people.

Somehow I think this state of affairs is transient – in many ways we are in a 'golden age' bubble these days and have forgotten, or have not been taught, about the way societies in general have lived throughout history and prehistory…

chucknorris

Sapphire wrote: »

Money and all the 'celebrity accoutrements' are what matters to much of Western society today. I think many of us are far more materialistic than we used to be, and have a far greater sense of entitlement. 'Keeping up with the Jones' is like an addiction to many people.

Somehow I think this state of affairs is transient – in many ways we are in a 'golden age' bubble these days and have forgotten, or have not been taught, about the way societies in general have lived throughout history and prehistory…

Walking our dog in the countryside on a nice summers day is what we really like doing, and we will be doing that later today. Even better if we can finish the afternoon (in the early evening) off by eating outside at a pub (so our dog can be with us).


Although with him being a lab, other people's picnics can definitely introduce some stressful moments.

PasturesNew

I don't spend money, I've none to spend and no access to any. Mortgage free is king. IO after an initial 2-3 years to settle in is bonkers.

Thrugelmir

quantic wrote: »

But to the outside they are high flyers who have it all. Is it just me or do you guys feel pressure occasionally from being surrounded by this?

None at all now. I find having the lack of pressure and related stress refreshing. More important things in life to worry about.

caronoel

How do you really know these people are over indebted? Sounds like someone has a bad case of jealousy

lisyloo

I don't feel pressure because I know I've planned sensibly for the future (I'm referring largely to pension). Those who are frittering it away will regret it later and I take no joy in saying that.

The last point is good that no-one knows what goes on behind closed doors, so you probably don't know what they've got.

I also believe in enjoying myself now, because health is a lottery and some of us will die before retirement. It's a balance between saving for a future you hope will happen but not denying yourself now in case it doesn't happen.

I do know what you mean but there's a massive difference between people who have 6 figure pension pots and those who have nothing. I take no joy in their short sightedness but I believe most will regret it.

Ps it blatantly obvious that money doesn't bug you happiness (princess Diana, Marilyn Monroe etc.). It's nice to be able to enjoy the finer things in life, but that's about all it is - nice. It doesn't bring true happiness. That comes from health, friends and family.

michaels

quantic wrote: »

Sometimes I feel surrounded by people who live faux celebrity lifestyles all funded by interest only mortgages, balloon payment cars and credit cards.

We don't spend much as a family, we have quite modest tastes, buy food in Aldi, drive a 7 year old car and try to save a proportion of our wages. We come from a "lower/middle class" background (if there is such a thing).

The daft thing is, a lot of the people I know are on the absolute bones of their a*rses, one small unexpected expense and it would be curtains. But to the outside they are high flyers who have it all. Is it just me or do you guys feel pressure occasionally from being surrounded by this?

I always think it is about insecurity.

Sapphire

lisyloo wrote: »

I don't feel pressure because I know I've planned sensibly for the future (I'm referring largely to pension). Those who are frittering it away will regret it later and I take no joy in saying that.

That's true, but I think that all those who are frittering money away (not just by using up pensions, but importantly, also by borrowing on the never-never) will blame everyone but themselves when they lose everything, a situation that could well put an end to the 'golden age'.

quantic

How do you really know these people are over indebted? Sounds like someone has a bad case of jealousy

Ok. Lets see. So I'm 29 and have 19k in my savings account, no debt and own 95k of my house having only owned it for 5 years. No I don't think that's the issue. I happen to know they are massively indebted.

Sapphire

michaels wrote: »

I always think it is about insecurity.

Yes but, you know, I feel that the insecurity has been brought about by people having it drilled into them (via money-making advertising and media propaganda) that they are somehow only 'worthwhile' if they have 'riches' of various sorts and aspire to ever-more 'riches', 'celebrity' and so on. Qualities that used to be something to aspire to are now considered old-fashioned…:cool: