Finding It Hard To Cope Its just a vicous cycle

Is_It_Worth_It_2

Dont know if this is the right place to post, or even if it will help. Suppose I am posting this just to try and vent some emotion and if any advice drops in then its a bonus.

I have been in debt ever since I split with my first partner. And despite many attempts of sorting the debt it just never gets any better just worse.

I am now 30 Years old with 4 Kids and one on the way and I just cant see the way foward.

As far as I know the debts I have are as follows:

Egg Card (£2500):- I dont even know where this debt is. On the numerous times I have sent them a means form to try and arrange a payment the debt has been shifted to another debt company.

Barclaycard (£1000): - I have made some payments after using the means form approach but they fell flat on thier face as well.

Car Finance (£5999):- Needed to get a car for work cost me £6K on finace made about 8 months payments and then they had to come and get the car. However before that my mum borrowed and crashed (twice) so despite payments made and they have the car back they want £5999.95 off me.

Water Rates (£1000):- This debt just crept up on me and appeared from nowhere.

Rent Arrears (£1000) :- Although they are not chasing me I feel obliged to pay as they were really understanding when I lived there. Have moved since.

Court Fine (£235.00):- Before I got the car taken I was pulled over as the police stated I had no insurance. It went to court and they found me guilt of no MOT. I had requested a new one as I knew it had not yet expired but the car company who did had gone bust. And despite the fact that I took a letter from my insurance company which stated they excepted that the letter they had sent to state insurance cancelled was lost in the post after they had checked with the post office, the court gave me points and a fine. I had to put this on hold as was still waiting for my benfits to be sorted and then arranged for the court to take £5 a week from my incapacity. I then recieved a letter stating I had no more time. When I called they said no arrangement had been made and they could no longer make one. I now have a the bailiff on the way as the minimum they will take is £80 a fortnight, which I cannot afford.

Council Market Stall Rent (£285.00):- Whilst working I took out a stall with the council based on the thriving footfall they boasted. This tied me in for 12 months and then found out the market was in a dying state and the footfall was approximatley 95% less than they boasted.

Friend 1 (£1000):- This is relatively new friend who I met as market trader and when I had to quit work he lent me money to try and keep my stall above waters.

High Interest Provident loan (£248.00):- I had no other option last Xmas to take one of these loans and although high interest they got me through a stage where if I could not of bought the kids presents I would of lost the plot completly.

And I have no quarms to state there is probably more debts that I have over looked or have slipped my scrambled mind.

Now to explain my situation I will need to go in time a little: -

April 19th 2004 I started a well paid job at Vodafone, this I thought was the start to clearing my debts. Some time into my employment my car completly died and thats when I got the new car on finance. Then October 2005, I slipped on some wet carpet in the office and was left on crutvhes after knee ligament damages and a aching back. As time went on my knee healed but my back got worse. I started a claim and as we all know they take time. At first Vodafone were really helpfull but when it all got too much and the painkillers were being used like smarties and they stopped being helpful I ceased my emploiyment with them in December 2006. By this time I had already taken out the market stall and friends and family were having to run it as I was in no fit state. My solicitor was really sure he would be getting me lots of money equating to all wage loss and even suppliment wage until I was able to work again. In the meantime my family life was getting worse due to finances and my inability to work or even help around the house so we split up (this is my seond wife and mother of kid 3 and 4).

Things were not good and ended up termionating my trenancy on a lovely house and moved in with mum. Solicitor had arranged to get intrim payment to top up my incapacity benefit and hold off some debtors. My wife and I decided to give another shot, the celebration has led to child number 5 due in December. And then out of the blue after over a year of waiting I get called for MRI scan which comes back clear. And even though they have stated it was more than likely a disc bulge the healing time is 12 weeks and the scan has come back clear and I am left with a mechanical bain problem that cannot be healed. But because the scan was so late the defendants are now getting away with stating I simply have a mechanical back problem which could of happened at time. So they are offering the best of £2K or go to court and the solicitor states they would win in court.

I cant even get out of bed in the morning without taking 2 x 60mg Morphine. I so much want to go back to work but cant. Now today has just about pushed me over the top.

Yesterday I recieved 2 letters. 1 from a bailiff for the court fine and another being a court summons. I am not sure what the summons is but the fines are similar to the bailif ones. I called the bailiff and explained I had taken out an agreement with the court to take £5 from my benefits, and also have what seems to be a court letter for the same fine. I agreed to call the courts and call them back today. I called the courts and got a recorded message stating "Our systems are down call tomorrow". So today I called them and got the same message. So I called the bailiff and they said they will wait no longer so I said I was willing to make a payment agreement. And offered £10 per week payable fortnightly as this is how I get my benefits. They turned me down and stated I have 6 weeks to pay it off and they want £80 from my just over £100 benefit. I explained to the woman who became snotty so I asked for a manager and again patiently explained that I could not afford this and was under the impression that I had arranged for payments to come from my benefits. She basically said "See you when we come to collect your goods" and hung up.

I have even tried to clkaim back the £900+ of bank charges but they turned me down flat and then this high court thing pops up so cant go any further and my claim id still plodding on at its own pace even though they had sent my solicitor an intrim payment of £2K, however this is because of this new medical evidence which states even though I could of been working for another 30 years before suffering from mechnaical back pain and its just one big co-incidence that it all started after my fall at work.

Where do I go? Anti-depressants not working and if I am honest I have a lot of morphen tablets here that are looking a good option the more it goes on.

Ricardo
Feeling so sorry for myself and then disgusted because there will be people dealing with worse situations.

jo1972

Ricardo, welcome to the board :wave: and well done for posting

I'm just about out the door to go home but wanted to say hi and that there are tons of people on here that can help you and give you support.

Try and get together your full statement of affairs, read this thread:

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280

This will show you the information you need to include. That way people on here can see where you're at and find ways to help.

I shall look back in again later when I get in.

Relax, take a deep breath, you are in the right place and you are on track to sorting it out

Jo.x

HairyHandofDartmoor

You sound like you need to see your doctor as you are depressed. Even if the antidepressants aren't working maybe you need a different type or just to talk.

About the debts you need to talk to the Citizens Advice Bureau, the Consumer Credit Counselling Service, or Payplan (free charities) who will advise you, but you will need to find all the paperwork about your debts so they have a full picture of what you owe and to who.

I'm sure there is a way of finding out what you owe and someone else will come along and suggest it soon.

In the meantime don't despair, you will get lots of help on here.

RAS

Hi

You may be able to locate some of the debts by getting your credit checks from the credit refernce companies. See martin's article under the cards and loans tab on the front page. It explains how to get them for free.

dylansmum

Hi

Lots of sympathy to you - the other poster are so right. You need to go to the CAB - it is free and they will help you sort this lot out. You also need to take of your health - if you can do the CAB thing and see your GP you can tackle this whole misery all at once. Just by taking control with free support you might start to feel better. Keep posting for help.

Is_It_Worth_It_2

Thanks for all the replys already, you guys seem to be a wealth of support so will be spending a bit of time in here in future.

Does any one know if the bailiff is right or are they just trying to scare me? They say they can only do 6 weeks payment plan and they are doing that out of kindness cause they can just send the boys round to collect my stuff as it is a court debt. Surely I should get the chance to call the courts and query why they are not doing what they said they would do. And even then surely if I can only afford x amount they cant say tuff and come and take away my stuff which apart from pc is mainly stuff used by the kids etc. I dont want to get away with not paying my debts I just need debtors to be patient and helpfull

tallyhoh

Hi,

I can't really help with your debts much but having gone through the same sort of trauma with my back I know how helpless and vulnerable you must feel.
I hope people will be along in a while to sort you out. You get the best advice on here.

RAS

IIWI

This is not my area, but you should be able to go to the court and ask for a revised financial deal.

Have a look at this thread http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=517432

which suggests

If you did not return any court forms you should go to the county court and complete an N245 which is a form to ask for your arrangement to be changed. The normal cost of this is £35 but if you are on benefits or low income you pay nothing but will need to complete Form EX160.

The awkward ones are Council tax debts.

Yorkielass

I read your thread a little while ago and I'm so glad you've come back and posted again. I can't give advice about baliffs etc but I really would recommend posting an Statement of Affairs - people on here are experts at suggesting ways to reduce your spending and hopefully the advice you get will mean you can buy a few presents at Christmas without going into more debt. Good luck and well done for posting on here - it's the most amazing website in the world.

Adrasteia01

Hi,
While I am no expert, I have read on here that Baliffs are only allowed to enter your house to take stuff if you either let them in, or they walk in first. The idea is you keep them out and they can't get your stuff (I've even heard of them climbing in windows before). If you have anything valuable, I'd suggest storing it at your parents or similar, to be sure they can't take it.

I also think you have to put your priority debts first. This is your council tax, your rent, food and electricity. Anything else (loans etc) can and have to wait. You don't have to pay them back at the rates they ask - payplan or similar charities will most likely suggest making token payments or small payments to pay them off slowly. They may also be able to get your interest frozen, which I'd say would help a great deal.

In the meantime, sell what you can on ebay. You can also earn money back through sites like quidco and pigsback. It probably won't amount to much, but every little bit helps. Also, instead of buying lots of food in, try and live off what you have and not spend too much money.

It seems a bit crazy that you owe 6 grand back to to the car finance when you no longer have the car. If they are making you pay back the full amount, shouldn't you be able to keep the car anyway? I think you need to chase this up, and have a look at the contract.

Also, you should check that you're getting all the benefits that you're entitled do. I think the website is entitledto.co.uk

Take care, and best of luck for sorting this out. If you list a statement of affairs (all of your incoming and outgoing funds) we'll have a look and give you some advice on it.

Try not to worry too much. I know it can be very worrying, but at the end of the day it's only money and it will get sorted out one way or another. Try not to get too stressed or upset over it.

Tamara

Burlesque_Babe

Is_It_Worth_It wrote: »

Thanks for all the replys already, you guys seem to be a wealth of support so will be spending a bit of time in here in future.

Spend as much time as you like here, we'll be here for you.

On the health front, I have the exact same back problem. A huge disc squashed my spinal cord and I was a mess. 6 years on and I'm in a 'living with it' scenario. All Iwill say is take it one day at a time, you may not end up 100% 'mended' but you will end up with a better quality of life. I look back 3 years and I was on a complete cocktail of drugs. i'm now taking occasional mixtures and i've made adjustments to my life. It ain't perfect and never will be, but it is a million times better than it was - and it will be for you as well.

go back to your GP and talk about the tablets you take for your back - you might need an anti-spasmodic which I found more useful than the morphine.

Also talk to him about the anti-depressants. Ask for something different and ask to be referred for counselling. Talking will help.