Father being duped

stevejex

Some help and advice needed please people?

My father 18 months ago lost his long time partner, she used to visit a hair salon weekly where a woman in her 40s befriended my father whom is a 76 yr old.

Since his partner has been gone this women has started popping round for coffee and gradually worming her way into his money.

My father has some rental property and a rental business. Her family know nothing of my father and we have never met this lady.

My father now gets duped into taking her shopping "out of town" obviously and ends up buying her things.

She even wanted a car at one point and my father refused so she cut him dead until he ended up buying it, she is now on her second car and had two holidays abroad one a family holiday.

Im told she is fairly aggressive and tempermental towards my Father and if he wont buy or give her money he gets the mind games and silent treatment.

Im not sure what her actual relationship status is.

She is a fraudster, duping an old lonely and vunerable man. His health is suffering and we believe she has wormed her way into his will.

We need to know if there is anything legal we can do involving police / solicitor?

Your help and advice is greatly appreciated.

Gigglepig

If your father is an adult of sound mind and has chosen to be a sugar daddy I don't see what the police or a solicitor can do. Is he vulnerable in any way?

Have you considered if your dad is lonely, and perhaps would enjoy that his family spends more time with him? Perhaps he would "need" her less.

fitnessguy1

you should probably try to advise him of her intentions. i don't think you can do much else other than warn him about her and let him make his own decisions regarding what to do about her.

meritaten

How does your father feel about this? has he expressed concern? is he happy to 'indulge' this lady?

marleyboy

If he is happy, then wish him luck and be happy for him.

74jax

Are you posting on behalf of you father? I would maybe be with him and together tell her to stop contacting him.

If you are posting for yourself, how does your dad feel. He clearly prefers her contact than the money in the bank, or else he would keep the money and let her walk away.

I presume you have spoken to her family if you know they do not know your dad, what did they say, where did they think the family holiday came from. Did they suggest anything?

Why is he 'duped' into taking her shopping?

Can you spend more time with your dad, so he isn't as lonely, start him up in some clubs maybe

I'd he happy, as much as he can be obviously.

stevejex

He has expressed concern in that he is now struggling financially...

We have expressed concern and he knows in his heart.

More time he almost lived with us after the death for almost a year until he bought the car for her.

barbarawright

Why haven't you met her?

marleyboy

I would go down and check his finances, on a ruse to checking his health. I would certainly make time to see her for myself and judge whether were talking theft or manipulation, or indeed if its just a case of amorous splurge.

SavingPennies_2

Gigglepig wrote: »

If your father is an adult of sound mind and has chosen to be a sugar daddy I don't see what the police or a solicitor can do. Is he vulnerable in any way?

Have you considered if your dad is lonely, and perhaps would enjoy that his family spends more time with him? Perhaps he would "need" her less.

I think it's unfair to insinuate that the OP does not spend time with his/her father as you don't know their circumstances, and spending time with other family members is not really a substitute after losing a long term live in partner/wife.

I always find it odd how when people post these sorts of issues everyone says, oh good luck to him, its his money etc etc. But I'm sure they wouldn't say that if it was their parent. Just because someone is worried their parent is being used by a gold digger doesn't mean they are just worried about losing their inheritance.

If the OPs father was happy and in a loving relationship/ friendship and was enjoying his time with this woman then good for him, however it sounds like the money is just going towards her enjoyment not theirs (did he join her on these holidays he paid for?) this does sound like he might be being manipulated.

meritaten

the problem here is - is he being 'manipulated' or 'defruaded'. the first is not a crime. which is why I asked if he was happy to pay for this womans 'treats'. if he was, and he is of sound mind then there really is no crime. if, however, he was 'coerced' into paying for them and is unhappy about it, then action can be taken. He IS an adult and can surely put a stop to the relationship if he feels he is being taken advantage of.
The family have to be very careful here - if he goes on to marry her for example. not to mention nobody likes to hear that people think they are foolish. my advice is to keep a close eye on the situation - but be VERY careful what is said to dad.