I'm pregnant and don't know if I can afford it..

englishlady90

Hello everyone,

I would like to thank anyone who will take the time to read this and try to advise me in this very delicate situation.

I am 25, British working full time for 17k and my hubby is 29 full time worker with a 5 year working visa on 17.5k.
We recently found out that I am pregnant and we are trying to make the right decision not only for us but for the future of our baby.
Both of us do not have one single family member in this country or close friends so we are into this on our own.. we do not own a house. Our rent is 850pcm plus all bills (about 200 pounds when trying to be tight). We do not own a car and our travel expenses are 135 pounds pcm each to get to work and back.
We do not have much savings, about 5k max.
If i were to leave my job for the baby we could never afford ourselves or the rent, but if i keep my job nursery costs will be higher than our rent and we could not afford them..

Does anyone have any advice they can give or useful information? i would be so grateful.. Thank you so much..

BigAunty

Yes, model the future scenario on the Turn2us online benefit calculator to identify what your benefit entitlements could be when you have a baby and a drop in income if you become a Stay At Home Mum - housing benefit, child benefit, perhaps child tax credits, working tax credits, council tax reduction.

Ask on the benefits forum if anything isn't clear. I believe tax credits can have a lag when a significant drop in income occurs as I think it takes into account the most recent salary but again, the benefits forum could explain how TCs work.

Also, download the MSE budget planner and work through the site to identify how to slash your spending and how you could plan a realistic budget for that new scenario.

What is the level of the rent that you pay compared to the maximum Local Housing Allowance for a 2 bed property (see your local council website for the LHA rate, the calculation for Housing Benefit entitlements in the private sector)? What you need to appreciate is that HB is calculated at the lowest third cheapest rents in the local area. If, for example, the rent you pay is £200 more pcm than the LHA, this is a sum that would be excluded from any calculation, you would always have to meet the excess from your own income. People who are dependent on HB try to find properties that are as close as possible to the LHA rates they are entitled to, otherwise they have to dig too deep to make up the shortfall themselves.

pickledonionspaceraider

One thing I would notice about your outgoings is £850 to rent a house is very high. I realise that rents change from area to area, but it may well be worthwhile considering living somewhere more affordable?

j.e.j.

Where I live £850 per month would get you a one-bedroom flat. It's so expensive here it's ridiculous!

OP, money aside, how do YOU feel about becoming a mum? Are you happy at the thought? Do you really want an abortion and could you live with the way you might feel afterwards? Is there any chance of you being able to move nearer to family and friends?

These ^^ are just questions, - they're not meant to be incendiary in any way. Everyone has to make their own decisions according to their own circumstances, but the old saying goes that if we all waited until we could afford a baby very few people would have one!

englishlady90

I live in London and 850 is the minimum I can pay for a one bedroom flat, this would still mean living in the outer part of London and commuting to work for about one hour each way.

I'm not sure how I feel about being a mum, I'm worried about not being able to afford it and abortion is something I've always been against but now things are in a different prospective..

I've never considered Housing Benefits as most of the private housing renting doesn't accept DSS.. therefore it would be a serious problem to look for a property that does.

Our families are both abroad, mine in Italy and his in India. It's not an option to move closer to them, we wouldn't have jobs there anyway..

Thank you all for your replies.

ognum

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

One thing I would notice about your outgoings is £850 to rent a house is very high. I realise that rents change from area to area, but it may well be worthwhile considering living somewhere more affordable?

you would be lucky to get a one bedroom flat where I live for £850 and it's not London!

ognum

englishlady90 wrote: »

Hello everyone,

I would like to thank anyone who will take the time to read this and try to advise me in this very delicate situation.

I am 25, British working full time for 17k and my hubby is 29 full time worker with a 5 year working visa on 17.5k.
We recently found out that I am pregnant and we are trying to make the right decision not only for us but for the future of our baby.
Both of us do not have one single family member in this country or close friends so we are into this on our own.. we do not own a house. Our rent is 850pcm plus all bills (about 200 pounds when trying to be tight). We do not own a car and our travel expenses are 135 pounds pcm each to get to work and back.
We do not have much savings, about 5k max.
If i were to leave my job for the baby we could never afford ourselves or the rent, but if i keep my job nursery costs will be higher than our rent and we could not afford them..

Does anyone have any advice they can give or useful information? i would be so grateful.. Thank you so much..

Whether you proceed with the pregnancy is you and your partners choice but maybe you should look carefully at your options.

Could your partner get a second job to help support your family
Could you work from home or closer to home.

I am not meaning to be rude but full time jobs on £17k are not well paid in London. What do you both do, could those jobs be transfer out of the very expensive capital city?

I understand that jobs for young people are impossible to get in Italy
but is this true in India? Could you move back there for support from your husbands family and some child care?

In the best scenario what would you like to happen?

englishlady90

ognum wrote: »

Whether you proceed with the pregnancy is you and your partners choice but maybe you should look carefully at your options.

Could your partner get a second job to help support your family
Could you work from home or closer to home.

I am not meaning to be rude but full time jobs on £17k are not well paid in London. What do you both do, could those jobs be transfer out of the very expensive capital city?

I understand that jobs for young people are impossible to get in Italy
but is this true in India? Could you move back there for support from your husbands family and some child care?

In the best scenario what would you like to happen?

You are perfectly right, but we have just started our first serious jobs and this was our entry salary as we had no previous experience.. I work as an office assistant and he works as an assistant accountant..
I suppose moving to India could be an option even if a very difficult one as I would be very far from my family and hardly ever being able to visit them.. But financially could work out..

BigAunty

You could stay where you are (assume its a 1 bed place) as many new parents keep a baby with them in the same room. Or you could move your bed into the lounge and make your room the nursery or the living room could double as the baby's room.

Housing Benefit is paid directly to the tenant - there is no need for your current landlord to find out if you claim HB in the future.

Then when the kid is bigger, and you are back at work, you won't find it so difficult to get a larger place as you'll have a higher income and less benefit dependency.

Also, you could consider moving out of London - there is natural flight of families who move out to the cheaper counties for a variety of reasons. Your income will go much further away from London (and the south-east) and won't require such an expensive and punishing commute. You may find that you can get a property for £100-200 per month less and a short commute perhaps £100-200 cheaper pcm for you both. You may earn a little less outside London but straight away, might save £400 in basic living/commuting expenses right away.

There is life outside London!

Is your partner's visa tied to a particular employer? When is he likely to get leave to remain or British Citizenship? Or are you tied to the new rules which forbid citizenship to those whose household's earn less than £x per year as the govt are keen to set a threshold where there is no benefit dependency for migrants? Or are you in the position where he gains your Italian citizenship which side-steps the UK rules around employment income and immigration (if you are Italian,its not clear if you have English family living there or are of Italian nationality yourself)?

It is true that many landlords are reluctant to rent to housing benefit claimants but they are more likely to accept a household with a working tenant in it,I think.

englishlady90

BigAunty wrote: »

You could stay where you are (assume its a 1 bed place) as many new parents keep a baby with them in the same room. Or you could move your bed into the lounge and make your room the nursery or the living room could double as the baby's room.

Housing Benefit is paid directly to the tenant - there is no need for your current landlord to find out if you claim HB in the future.

Then when the kid is bigger, and you are back at work, you won't find it so difficult to get a larger place as you'll have a higher income and less benefit dependency.

Also, you could consider moving out of London - there is natural flight of families who move out to the cheaper counties for a variety of reasons. Your income will go much further away from London (and the south-east) and won't require such an expensive and punishing commute. You may find that you can get a property for £100-200 per month less and a short commute perhaps £100-200 cheaper pcm for you both. You may earn a little less outside London but straight away, might save £400 in basic living/commuting expenses right away.

There is life outside London!

Is your partner's visa tied to a particular employer? When is he likely to get leave to remain or British Citizenship? Or are you tied to the new rules which forbid citizenship to those whose household's earn less than £x per year as the govt are keen to set a threshold where there is no benefit dependency for migrants? Or are you in the position where he gains your Italian citizenship which side-steps the UK rules around employment income and immigration (if you are Italian,its not clear if you have English family living there or are of Italian nationality yourself)?

It is true that many landlords are reluctant to rent to housing benefit claimants but they are more likely to accept a household with a working tenant in it,I think.

My mum is British and my dad Italian therefore I'm a dual citizen. My husband applied for a 5 year visa as a family member of an EEA national as it was easier at the time. Not sure if that makes any difference of if he can apply with me for benefits, I read online that since his visa is on a limited time he cannot. He should, after the 5 years pass, get a permanent residency and he will be able to apply for it in Feb 2018.

Right now we live in a studio flat in central London as with our previous jobs (often night shifts) we needed to be closer to the city centre.. but since our tenancy expires in June and now we both have 9-to-5 jobs we were already looking to move in zone 5-6 so that we could rent a one bedroom flat for cheaper than what we are paying now.
Looking at the cheapest areas of London's last zones the prices are still 850 average for a one-bed flat.

We could consider moving out of London but we need to find jobs firstly as we could never afford to move without an income.

It just feels really impossible to match the figures right now and I've never approved of couples that have children without being sure they can sustain them..

Newlyboughthouse

Sorry to be the one to say it but, were you careful? I.e. did you use contraception? If not, why not....