Happy relationships? Anyone? Anyone?

Bobarella

I think as the OP says above, communication is everything. Whenever I start to withdraw from my partner, which I know I do when I get very stressed, it makes ME feel worse. It's better to keep going at it even when you feel like it's only negatives coming out of your mouth.
Shared history also can feel very comforting. We are at 15 years together, 8 married. And as we've effectively grown up together, although he is 8 years older, the bond between us is strengthened by the history. And a little boy who we adore and enjoy every day.
Don't settle for anything less than an amazing partner. The right one is out there, & a rewarding relationship is one of life's best things I feel.

pelirocco

You get out what you put in , respect , consideration and above all the realisation that only you can make yourself happy

z.n

Communication, mutual respect, and a clear agreement over who puts the bins out. Oh and tolerance of each others irritating foibles.

(33 years)

Poppie68

I have been married for 24 years and the entire time has been spent with my husband either being away for months on end or as now he is on home on weekends. We have an amazing relationship as we both have got ito a routine. The spent together is precious and we make a fuss of each other.

Baby_Angel

We will be married for 20 years come this September. I didn't know him before marriage. He is everything I am not and vice versa. I am the control freak and he is sooo laid back. We both didn't have any other relationships before us! We were brought up to think marriage is all about compromises. I think the first few years we had to learn to get the balance right and after that it was more or less smooth sailing (I think!). We have differences in everything you can imagine. However we have learnt to use the best in both of us to work out as a family. We don't say I love you to each other (it is not used so much in our language for some odd reason), but it reflects in everything he does. He knows it and I know it. We have had unimaginable problems in our married life and it has only brought us closer together and not apart.
I can't think of a life without him. Would that explains how happy I am?

quidsy

z.n wrote: »

Communication, mutual respect, and a clear agreement over who puts the bins out. Oh and tolerance of each others irritating foibles.

(33 years)

lol, am only 15 years in but this is it. Mutual respect & focusing on the small every day things rather than the large grand gestures. We do little things for each other to show we care. I haven't put out a bin on 14.5 years and he hasn't cleaned a toilet in the same time frame. :rotfl:

d70cw6

motorboating when you wake up

Mrs_Optimist

Married 17 years this year but been together for 22 years.


He brings me a cup of tea in bed every morning without fail - I make the evening meals. He does all the DIY, I do most of the housework although he will do jobs that need doing, such as emptying dishwasher, bins for example - a very 1950's set-up really but it suits us. We rarely argue as we agree on most things and importantly we both have the same financial views which is a BIG DEAL in any relationship. He doesn't drink, I love a drink. I hate sport, he still plays football - in his mid 40's.


We still make each other laugh and he definately still "floats my boat"


We both prefer to spend time together than apart. Reading back my post it seems that Opposites do attract - although I consider we are very similar? The overall feeling though is that we don't have to work at it - it just flows - and we discuss any issue that concerns us before it becomes a big deal.

catkins

Been married 34 years (first and only marriage) and, of course, had our ups and downs but I couldn't imagine my life without him and know he feels the same.


We drive each other mad at times but even when I feel like I am furious with him, it only ever lasts a brief time. Sometimes I get angry but then look at him and just burst out laughing - I can never stay angry.


He makes me laugh (a lot) even after so long. We do share a lot of interests but we are also happy to compromise. We go to the cinema a lot and take it in turns to choose the film. The only films I refuse to go to are horror ones but I have seen so many films I really thought I would hate and actually really liked them. I also love visiting gardens and OH is always happy to come with me even though he is not that keen himself. May not sound such a big deal but I know quite a few couples that won't do something they don't like/fancy even though the other wants to.


We are definitely best friends and get on brilliantly. I do think that it is important to be friends and, as another poster said, to actually like each other as well as love.


I am happier spending time with OH than anyone else. When I go out with friends and I almost always miss him

kpwll

Together 41 years, married 35 & counting. There is no secret, it's hard work at times and a doddle at others. He's my rock, I'm his anchor. You can love each other 1 minute and can't stand the sight of each other the next. I know I irritate him at times and he drives me batty at others. About the only thing we've never argued about is the toilet seat being up or down.
We share some interests and have some that the other isn't interested in. We're a couple, partners, best friends BUT different. We complete and complement each other. He's due to retire this year and both of us are looking forward to it. I can't (don't want) to imagine my life without him by my side, I'd survive but a lot of the joy would be missing.