Renovations and Repayments.

Red-Squirrel_2

-taff wrote: »

You know what happens when you find something offensive? Absolutely nothing.

You can be offended at someone else's personal experience as you like, so can I. Anyone can. It won't change anything though and getting on your horse about it achieves nothing at all.

They are speaking from their point of you, you from yours, obviously neither of you is going to change your minds about it, so why not just let it go otherwise this great thread is going to have a derailment.

You know what can happen when somebody lets you know that they found something you said offensive? You can think about it, and ask why that might have been, and whether you did in fact say something out of turn or that was an unfair generalisation or stereotype. You can then refrain from saying similar things again in the future so as to avoid upsetting others or causing hurt feelings which (I feel) is a very worthwhile aim.

Please don't accuse me of derailing the thread, if you wanted to avoid that you would have PM'd me wouldn't you?

Alex, I hope you're feeling better now that you've made your decision.

AlexLK

Want to get things back on track. Not had a great week so far and shouldn't have tried to pretend everything was alright. I wasn't alright but hoped this time around I could just ignore what was going on in my mind like everyone else can. Went to my GP today and have a follow up appointment. Need to stop being ashamed of it and just deal with it.

I'm looking forward to getting more involved in property. Not really something I ever considered as a profession but it seemed to be waiting for me and I'm really looking forward to my new job. Lots to learn and be involved in but a much more relaxed atmosphere than the school.

Financially this month has been a disaster. I've been buying things I don't need and the mortgage was paid from savings. Not good. My wife doesn't know yet but I think I need to tell her.

Red-Squirrel_2

I'm really pleased you've gone to the GP Alex, you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

kelpie35

Need to stop being ashamed of it and just deal with it.

Please, please Alex keep saying this to yourself.

I am so happy that you have been to visit your GP and please remember to go to your follow up appointment. Take on board any help and advice given.

I do hope you are able to share with your wife your financial situation and that you both can work through this hick up. Remember only a few months ago your finances were working well and I know that you both will be able to get back on track.

Have you managed to get the elf ready for action?

I am sure your son will be getting excited for Christmas.

Please take care and enjoy working hard on your new project.

-taff

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

You know what can happen when somebody lets you know that they found something you said offensive? You can think about it, and ask why that might have been, and whether you did in fact say something out of turn or that was an unfair generalisation or stereotype. You can then refrain from saying similar things again in the future so as to avoid upsetting others or causing hurt feelings which (I feel) is a very worthwhile aim.

Please don't accuse me of derailing the thread, if you wanted to avoid that you would have PM'd me wouldn't you? .

I apologise for accusing you of almost derailing the thread.
I've only PM'd three people, and only then to exchange information, not to continue arguments.
Personaly, I wouldn't think about it because I believe that too many people are special little snowflakes who just love to see the offence where there is none, or make mountains out of molehills.


Pleased you recognised you were in need of a bit of help Alex, it's not a failure to ask for some

AlexLK

So, I'm posting late again... :rotfl: Realise I need to respond to everyone and will try to tomorrow but it is getting a little late tonight and I'm heading to bed soon.

Told my wife about the finances. She said we'll get back on track and at least we haven't got into debt and or got my parents involved. Things are different between us. She would have never trusted me enough to pass my details to a person she knows through work last year and if I'd admitted messing up over something she'd try to hurt me in some way or another. Yesterday she said she's proud of me for recognising the teaching wasn't working and acting accordingly. I was expecting her to berate me for not carrying on with it. In a strange way what happened last year / start of this has been the best thing to happen to our marriage even though at the time I thought it was over.

Think I need to make my own advent calendar...so here's the first three days:
1st Christmas Decs up whilst son is at school tomorrow. I'll tell him the elf did it. :rotfl:
2nd Find out what my son wants for Christmas. Going to try to get the Christmas shopping done a little earlier this year.
3rd Record keeping, set up for the month

kelpie35

AlexLK wrote: »

So, I'm posting late again... :rotfl: Realise I need to respond to everyone and will try to tomorrow but it is getting a little late tonight and I'm heading to bed soon.

Told my wife about the finances. She said we'll get back on track and at least we haven't got into debt and or got my parents involved. Things are different between us. She would have never trusted me enough to pass my details to a person she knows through work last year and if I'd admitted messing up over something she'd try to hurt me in some way or another. Yesterday she said she's proud of me for recognising the teaching wasn't working and acting accordingly. I was expecting her to berate me for not carrying on with it. In a strange way what happened last year / start of this has been the best thing to happen to our marriage even though at the time I thought it was over.

Think I need to make my own advent calendar...so here's the first three days:
1st Christmas Decs up whilst son is at school tomorrow. I'll tell him the elf did it. :rotfl:
2nd Find out what my son wants for Christmas. Going to try to get the Christmas shopping done a little earlier this year.
3rd Record keeping, set up for the month

Well done on all you have achieved today :T

I am so so happy that things are working so well for you as a couple. Please keep up the good work because you know honesty is the best policy.

I do hope your son loves the effort you have gone to to make it an enjoyable time of year.

Take care.

Jelllibeanz

Alex I must confess that I have not read your diary from beginning to end, but sincerely appreciate your openess and honesty. Am pleased you are making progress. Being in education myself I know all too well how it can take it's toll on us and those around us.

Good to see you are planning. Be kind to yourself.

Best wishes -J- x

AlexLK

Thanks all.

Got the Christmas decorations up whilst my son was at school. He was more pleased to see the elf (who he thinks did it whilst I was "out" during the day). He asked about the elf prior to yesterday and I told him I wasn't sure whether I'd let him in this year.

Had to clarify some of the things my son wanted for Christmas. I think he'd heard about some from school without really knowing what he was asking for (one was a computer game and we don't have a player :rotfl:). There was that and a couple of others (a trombone, iPad :eek:) I've told him are out of the question. Rather glad we don't tell him Father Christmas buys all his gifts. My parents are setting up a model railway for him, quite glad it's keeping them busy and I know my son will really like that.

kelpie35

I am so pleased your son appreciates all the effort you went to make it so lovely and exciting for him .

The longer you can have him believing in all the wonderment the better, because when they don't get excited anymore it does not feel the same.

Hope you are having a relaxing weekend.

Take care.