Renovations and Repayments.

heartbreak_star

I would thank those posts twice if I could, Alex

I have every faith your 2016 will be great. I think this year's been a harsh one with LK going to school and the ructions within your family.

Look at the positives - LK is turning out well, you have made a massive difference to kids' lives with your teaching, you and Mrs K are working more as a team, and in a way (despite wobbles!) you are asserting your own identity with your parents.

I get the feeling you're a bit like me...things must be PERFECT and RIGHT NOW and it's MY FAULT if they're not...but newgirly and Sue are right - little steps still get you where you want to be...it just might take longer and you might go via a different route

HBS x

the_end_of_the_rainbow

Quote: I wish I could move on and be happy with my lot in life but every time I think about it I am disappointed with myself because I cannot give my son the opportunities my parents gave me.


Alex - I hardly ever post on MSE but read all the time. I just wanted to say that you have given your son so much more than your parents have ever given you. You have given him love and security and confidence - these matter far more than all the money in the world. You should be immensely PROUD of yourself.

Take care x

AlexLK

SueP19 wrote: »

It's all we can do............try

£1 a day is £365 a year :T

:beer:

I agree that all we can do is try. Often I think I need to try harder though.

My initial thought to the £365 overpayment was to feel very negative about it because it doesn't really make a difference to a balance of £180,000 but I suppose it's an extra £365 we'll not have to pay interest on. Therefore, a step in the right direction.

The money situation really gets me down.

heartbreak_star wrote: »

I would thank those posts twice if I could, Alex

I have every faith your 2016 will be great. I think this year's been a harsh one with LK going to school and the ructions within your family.

Look at the positives - LK is turning out well, you have made a massive difference to kids' lives with your teaching, you and Mrs K are working more as a team, and in a way (despite wobbles!) you are asserting your own identity with your parents.

I get the feeling you're a bit like me...things must be PERFECT and RIGHT NOW and it's MY FAULT if they're not...but newgirly and Sue are right - little steps still get you where you want to be...it just might take longer and you might go via a different route

HBS x

Thanks, HBS. Had an awful evening but Mrs K persuaded me to start learning some accompaniments for pupils which did take my mind off it. Seems distracting myself is the only positive option a lot of the time.

I'll admit my son going to school has made the end of this year more difficult than in a long time. We've got a few things in the new year to look forward to as we've already planned a family holiday and Mrs K and I will be celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary. Less said the better about my parents; father is very annoyed I haven't been there for lunch in 4 days. How dare I, ungrateful, selfish, expect inheritance but don't want to look after them in their old age etc. etc.

:rotfl: You're right about me wanting things to be perfect right now. Think I'm getting to the age where I ought to have my life sorted.

the_end_of_the_rainbow wrote: »

Quote: I wish I could move on and be happy with my lot in life but every time I think about it I am disappointed with myself because I cannot give my son the opportunities my parents gave me.

Alex - I hardly ever post on MSE but read all the time. I just wanted to say that you have given your son so much more than your parents have ever given you. You have given him love and security and confidence - these matter far more than all the money in the world. You should be immensely PROUD of yourself.

Take care x

Thank you, my wife has said something similar. I do try my absolute best to be a good father to my son.

I happen to think there's a lot more to being a parent than throwing money at "the problem". My parents disagree, they've made it very clear they think I'm an irresponsible parent who chose to become a parent too young and have no idea how much it costs to raise a child.

maman

AlexLK wrote: »

Less said the better about my parents; father is very annoyed I haven't been there for lunch in 4 days. How dare I, ungrateful, selfish, expect inheritance but don't want to look after them in their old age etc. etc.

How could you, you ungrateful monkey!!!:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:


Keep it up!!


I'd suggest you do some things with LittleK in the next few days. Make the most of his school holiday not just visit your parents. What about a picnic? Visit the scummies for an hour? I'm sure they'd love to see him.

newgirly

Hi Alex, well done doing the list (mine was only 40 as I turned 40!) can't wait to see it.


This is probably a very inappropriate comment but I think your parents should be very grateful that you had your ds relatively young, they have had the opportunity to be part of his life. if you had had him when much older like your parents did with you that would not be the case probably.


Sorry but they do sound more than unkind to you sometimes, it makes me very cross, how on earth your dw copes with it I don't know.

SueP19

AlexLK wrote: »

I agree that all we can do is try. Often I think I need to try harder though.

My initial thought to the £365 overpayment was to feel very negative about it because it doesn't really make a difference to a balance of £180,000 but I suppose it's an extra £365 we'll not have to pay interest on. Therefore, a step in the right direction.

For a long long time my outgoings were more than my income, in the past I have cried, ranted, raved and screamed at my situation so I truely understand how you feel. £365 is a start not an end point, it is money that you will never interest on ever again. Who knows what the future holds. Back in 2009 when I joined I was at my wits end, I frequents the DFW boards but read this one never daring to dream I would post here or even be contempating the idea of being MF BUT I'm here. Be brave and feel the fear but do it anyway x

AlexLK

maman wrote: »

How could you, you ungrateful monkey!!!:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Keep it up!!

I'd suggest you do some things with LittleK in the next few days. Make the most of his school holiday not just visit your parents. What about a picnic? Visit the scummies for an hour? I'm sure they'd love to see him.

:rotfl: I've only not been to parents' for lunch because I've not been able to face going out. Was a little better this morning and took son to see them for an hour and have lunch there. Father wasn't happy: where had I been, I look fine and he's not very well, mother needs a break from the dog! To be honest, I'm beginning to think you're right.

Mrs K went to see her parents today and we're going there as a family one day before Christmas. Apparently they're "looking forward" to seeing son and I. :eek:

newgirly wrote: »

Hi Alex, well done doing the list (mine was only 40 as I turned 40!) can't wait to see it.

This is probably a very inappropriate comment but I think your parents should be very grateful that you had your ds relatively young, they have had the opportunity to be part of his life. if you had had him when much older like your parents did with you that would not be the case probably.

Sorry but they do sound more than unkind to you sometimes, it makes me very cross, how on earth your dw copes with it I don't know.

Well, I've a few teaching things on my list (worksheets for scale requirements, a few specific theory worksheets) but nothing else yet.

I understand your comment re. my parents I don't think it's an inappropriate thing to say, just true.

Wife gets on OK with my parents when they are being civil but she's not got an awful lot of respect for them and thinks they're the source of a lot of my troubles. It's not great, to be honest.

SueP19 wrote: »

For a long long time my outgoings were more than my income, in the past I have cried, ranted, raved and screamed at my situation so I truely understand how you feel. £365 is a start not an end point, it is money that you will never interest on ever again. Who knows what the future holds. Back in 2009 when I joined I was at my wits end, I frequents the DFW boards but read this one never daring to dream I would post here or even be contempating the idea of being MF BUT I'm here. Be brave and feel the fear but do it anyway x

When I had debts pre-MSE I'd just deny them and hide the letters in a draw. I still dread letters coming through the door but that's starting to get better. Keep forcing myself to let my wife open them now as I used to hate the thought of her finding out how bad things were.

Currently we overpay just under £250 per month on the mortgage. I told my wife about the extra £1 per day and she thought we could do an extra £1 per day for the first year, £2 per day for the second year etc. etc. She's decided 2016 is going to be the year for sorting out the finances and has agreed to do a spending diary in January. Really pleased she admitted it was stupid of her to cause an argument at the beginning of this month when I can look online anyway. Not one of her cleverest moments, that. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Watty1

AlexLK wrote: »

I told my wife about the extra £1 per day and she thought we could do an extra £1 per day for the first year, £2 per day for the second year etc. etc. She's decided 2016 is going to be the year for sorting out the finances and has agreed to do a spending diary in January. Really pleased she admitted it was stupid of her to cause an argument at the beginning of this month when I can look online anyway. Not one of her cleverest moments, that. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

How positive is this :j

newgirly

Great news Alex . Hope you are going to put silly fun stuff on the list too!

Have you thought of trying matched betting? I have not done it (too complicated!) but ed has done well in the past, you basically get the free bet money when registering by placing bets which cancel each other out. (Sort of , I think!!!!) could be one to.put on the list and op the extra £1 a day with - 2 x birds one stone

AlexLK

Had quite a good day. Not really done a lot or spent anything but it's been nice to spend some time together as a family without any particular goal. Free lunch at parents', of course and they were in good spirits. Mrs K had a drive in the TR6, loves it but we also had a talk about selling a few of the cars (it's getting a bit silly again 3xLRs, 1xBMW, 1xDaimler, 2xTriumphs) and also wife having a company car for work as her 5 Series has started getting to the expensive time in its life.

Glad the weather has been a little better, we had a really good walk with the dogs and washed 3 of the cars.

Tomorrow we're finishing the dreaded Christmas shopping. :rotfl: Hoping I'll be OK as I really don't want a repeat of last week.

MSE news: NSD and £30 into savings.

Watty1 wrote: »

How positive is this :j

Just hoping we follow through now.

newgirly wrote: »

Great news Alex . Hope you are going to put silly fun stuff on the list too!

Have you thought of trying matched betting? I have not done it (too complicated!) but ed has done well in the past, you basically get the free bet money when registering by placing bets which cancel each other out. (Sort of , I think!!!!) could be one to.put on the list and op the extra £1 a day with - 2 x birds one stone

Thanks, NG and definitely going to put some silly fun stuff on the list. Mrs K is also doing list, so I'm hoping there'll be some overlap.

I don't exactly have a great track record with gambling, though it's mainly involved drunken nights out at a casino with me trying to play the big shot during my younger years. Embarrassing, to be honest.

However, very interested if it's risk free, won't take too much of my time and will make a couple of hundred £££s per year. Ed, is this doable, please?