The Garden Fence - help and support in tough times

mardatha

We stopped getting their milk, it goes off very fast.

pollyanna_26

Morning everyone . Thinking of Hester who will be at work now and hoping tomorrow will not be too much of an ordeal .
Monna You do not need to be sorry for being down . You are human like the rest of us . I believe a good vent in a safe place where no one is going to judge you is a very healthy alternative to maybe ending up at the doctors . Very few of us will meet in real life but it doesn't stop us caring for each other .
I believe positive vibes can make good things happen and I think everyone here is wishing for happy outcomes for all .
Dare I ask Mar if things are any warmer up there yet ? Hope you get some spring soon.
Hope all is well Nurse Maggie and son . Glad you had a good day in Blackpool .
Well it's dry , windy and cold so I am going to hang out washload no 2.
Take care all
polly

moneyistooshorttomention

Hard_Up_Hester wrote: »

Hi Floss
I have tried/suggested/shouted, but no he flatly refuses to go.

Which just leaves trickery (aka low cunning)....:cool:

That is possible sometimes - ask my mother (who has successfully done it before now....):cool:

Re housing options = are you in a part of the country where people over "a certain age" can buy property for less than its value on a sort of lifetime lease?

Floss

Hard_Up_Hester wrote: »

Hi Floss
I have tried/suggested/shouted, but no he flatly refuses to go.

What would be his reaction if you told him you were considering going to the GP, as you are struggling to cope with everything going on AND supporting him? Would he perhaps accompany you as YOUR support?

fuddle

Monna next time you lose something when typing on your tablet tap the pages opened tab.

On my tablet it is marked by a square to the right of the arrow and the 'button' that takes me to my apps. It's those things that pop up at the bottom to help navigate the tablet. Hope I make sense! Any way. Under my square is a collection things I have had open. Sometimes when I have lost something its hiding there.

Hope to help even those I expect to have caused more confusion :eek::rotfl:

monnagran

Thanks fuddle. I've found the arrow - clever girl! I know that if you touch certain areas on the frame certain things happen which is a bit disconcerting when you move the hand that is holding the tablet and are suddenly presented with a whole unexpected scenario.
Oh, the joys!

x

lillibet_dripping

Hester - just an observation. When my dad's parents died (he is an only child) he found it very tough for a long time. He tried to explain the 'pressure' and perhaps 'fear' of being at the top of the family unit and responsible for everybody downwards rather than having somebody 'above' him to whom he could turn. He said it was an intense feeling of abandonment and he felt like (as, indeed, he was....) an orphan.
It didn't matter how many children or grand-children he had, he felt all alone in the world.....
Lilli

Hard_Up_Hester

Thank you all for your concern, TBH, now the decision has been made I feel better, playing the glad game as much as possible.

To explain in a bit more detail hubby was originally offered a couple of days work at school in 2011 as there were staff shortages, this 'couple of days' turned in to a years temporary contract. At the end of the year 3 permanent jobs were advertised, hubby applied but didn't get a job , they were given to relatives of teaching staff.
Hubby got a job in the private sector but it meant a lot of travelling, two of the people taken on didn't work out and the other team members fell out with the bursar. This meant the school site suffered so hubby was asked to return and because of the convenience of the school he accepted.
He had worked well with the team previously and expected this to continue, unfortunately the person who had been made team leader believed hubby to be a spy for the bursar so made hubby's life hell and encouraged the rest of the team to do the same. Stupid things like spitting in his coffee and not letting him into the rest area along with more dangerous events like dropping one end of heavy item he was carrying.
Just as hubby was on the verge of making a formal complaint, 2 team members left and the team leader went off sick for a year. When the team leader returned he was given a different job. In the latest reshuffle he has been put back in charge of hubby and the rest of his team.
Hubby is dreading working with him again, he still hasn't recovered from losing his Mum. I'm certainly not prepared for hubby to be treated badly again, hence the downsizing.
We are still plotting and planning, hubby is applying for other jobs, but his age is against him as is the fact that he can't drive.
But although hubby has explained his concerns they are being ignored, the powers that be are probably assuming he won't be able to get another job, they also assume he won't leave as we have a mortgage to pay. I think this is a despicable way to behave and I refuse to let them win.
A lot depends on my staff review tomorrow, I know there are redundancies in the pipeline and one colleague has had their salary reduced by £3000.
By us downsizing we retain a measure of control over our lives, this is important to both of us.
Sorry to have bored you all by waffling on for so long.
I will now sit in a corner singing I gotta be me, I gotta be free in the style of Sammy Davis Junior!!

monnagran

Hester, I have been struggling to remember the words of an old song. Can't remember who sang it.............

Freedom's just another word.........for nothing left to lose.
Nothing ain't worth nothing, but it's free..
Feeling good is good enough for me...

You have both had a pretty raw deal on all sorts of levels. You deserve the best now.

Just go for it.

x

Floss

HH, please seek advice on you and your L&M's employment rights, what employers do and condone others doing may not be legal and there may be protection for you both. The Employment board is a good starting place.
Floss xx