No More Chardonnay for me! My booze-free Diary

Carviscocker

Hi! Thanks MC I've got an expensive few months coming up so I really do need to stop wasting money on rubbish! I'm quite enjoying the challenges.. I definitely feel more accountable now I'm posting!

Still not had a drink! On day 17 today which I'm quite impressed with. It's amazing me how much time I'm spending thinking about alcohol lol

I joined the local library yesterday.. I like reading and after HB mentioned the library it occurred to me I could save money on buying books too!

I got out 'the sober revolution'..so far so good! So far I feel like it could have been written about me (not sure if that's good or bad!).

I will take your advice about the night out.. Also it's with work people I really don't want to run the risk of doing something ridiculous!

Hope everyone is having a fab week so far x

MarylandCookie_2

That's the thing with blogs/posting of forums you do feel more accountable - its a good thing, for me anyway! Glad you're enjoying the library, and books - and it's all free - another plus!

Day 17 is great, you must be so pleased with your progress. I'm the same when I'm not drinking, I think about it a lot. I posted about it earlier, and I don't find counting days helpful, just for that reason. I'm just trying to go with the flow at the minute. Got lots of AF drinks in, I'm liking the Fosters Radler, Becks Blue and a Bavarian lager from Tesco.

Keep up the good work, enjoy the rest of your week. Hope Chardonnay is having a great holiday xx

Honey_Bear

Anything that keeps us from the booze is time and money well spent, particuarly in the early days. I use three different libraries in this city when I have to visit different parts of it and I'm amazed at how often I come across a completely different set of books in each one. Apart from the money-saving and not having to declutter having bought stuff, books included, what's on sale is newly published. Libraries tend to have quite an extensive back catalogue so I found quite a good cross-section on the subject of giving up the booze. (More than in W@t3rst0ne$, anyway.)

Day 17! Fantastic. Well done.

Chardonnay

Hello all! Just caught up with this thread. Well done Carvis, you're doing brilliantly! Hope you're both ok HB and MC! :wave:

OK, well I had a wonderful holiday but, there's no easy way of saying this, I had a drink. I don't regret it, it was in moderation and I still managed to do two 5k and one 10k run (got a PB for that one!) and that was my main concern, that if I had a drink I would go over the top and the running would go out of the window.

The cravings started on the way down but I decided I wouldn't rush into drinking and would see how I felt. I got through the first two days like that, but on the third day we were in Cornwall, sitting outside pubs in the sunshine and it just felt too restrictive for me so I had half a shandy and two glasses of wine with my meal in the evening. That was a general pattern from them on, one drink with my lunch and a couple in the evening, with the odd glass of Prosecco/champers thrown in (we had a welcome half bottle of Champers in our room when we got to Cornwall - it was just too much temptation - OH and I shared that).

I am pleased with how it went. I drank mindfully and not at every opportunity like I did in the past. I think the fact we were on holiday and relaxed definitely helped a lot when it came to the effects of alcohol. I didn't drink yesterday when we got home and won't drink tonight. For me, I think the main reason I stopped was because it made me feel rubbish physically and mentally and I know that I can't go back to drinking to excess but I really do feel that I have learned a lot during my period of not drinking and really do not want to go back to feeling rubbish. I think because of the way I stopped drinking (nothing bad happened to trigger it, I just decided not to drink for a while and it snowballed from there), deep down I knew I wasn't 100% committed to being AF for ever and I do think that's truthfully probably the reason why I didn't join Belle's challenge this time so I didn't have to be accountable to anyone but myself.

So I made it to Day 83 and then had a drink. I'm proud of myself for that but I really hope you all aren't too disappointed in me! Please don't let my experience put anyone else off stopping for good. There are so many benefits and I may well stop again if I feel the need to. This thread has been a wonderful source of support and the camaraderie is brilliant so I'll still be charting my journey and looking forward to hearing how you're all getting on! I find it very helpful too to look back at my progress and also see if things are working for me or not - rather than delude myself that I'm ok when I'm not.

So sorry if this isn't the news you wanted to hear but hope you're all ok and have a lovely weekend! xx

MarylandCookie_2

Hi Chardonnany, great to hear from you, glad you had a good holiday.

Please don't think for one minute that we/I would be disappointed in you having a drink. You have always been so supportive of my journey and my choices, and have never been judgemental in my choice to drink, and I want to reciprocate that.

It sounds like you thought carefully and mindfully about your decision to drink, and drank mindfully. I've no words of wisdom, no surprise there! But please, please don't feel like you've let me down - you havent, not at all.

In fact I was reading something recently about drinking moderately, and what constitutes a moderate drinker. And since Ive posted on your thread and been more considered about my drinking, I've been much more moderate in my alcohol consumption, and the support here has really helped me.

Anyway, enough rambling from me! Take care, and please keep posting xx

Chardonnay

Thanks MC! Your words mean such a lot. I was a bit nervous of coming back on here to see people's replies. Silly I know, but I feel like we've got such a lovely little group here, and I would hate to disappoint you all!

Yes, I didn't rush into drinking this time and do feel that I drank mindfully. I am going to try moderation again and see how I get on. I really do feel that I've learned a lot. When I think about it, this all started when I decided to try Stoptober and it seemed like such a massive undertaking not to drink for a month. Well not only did I achieve that but I've also managed to achieve two much longer spells without drink, and it's got easier each time.

Really pleased that this thread has helped you to moderate MC! The support has certainly helped me so much.

I didn't drink Thursday or Friday and didn't feel tempted in the slightest. I am just rushing off to parkrun now and then we are heading off down to Bristol for the weekend so a busy weekend planned again! We are all going out for a meal tonight so I may have a drink, but no more than two glasses of wine. Then I won't be drinking for at least a week as I am running my first 10k race next Sunday. So excited about that! Running definitely comes before alcohol for me now!

Hope you have a fab weekend! xx

Honey_Bear

Chardonnay, I don't feel in the slightest disappointed in you, and in the end, it's what you think and feel that counts. I can't moderate - I wish I could an if I could, I would. If anyone else thinks they have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol and takes steps to deal with it and can then drink - jolly good luck to you. I loathe the health fascists who are convinced they know what's right for everyone else and preach. It doesn't work, it doesn't achieve anything, it's a form of bullying and it actually makes the victim feel worse about coming forward and being willing to talk about booze objectively.

What is important is finding out what is right for you, what works and doesn't, what triggers the episodes that you later regret and what you get from not over-indulging. I think you're doing fantastically well and really look forward to reading your posts. Good on you.

MarylandCookie_2

Brilliantly put HB, wish I was as eloquent as you. I feel exactly the same way too!

Carviscocker

Glad you had a lovely holiday Chardonnay! From a newbies perspective I just want to say well done! Everyone's story is different and it's all about working out what is right for you! X

MarylandCookie_2

Hi Chardonnany, hope you had a lovely weekend. How did Parkrun go Saturday morning? When's your 10k, bet it's not long now x