son eating me out of house and home

valk_scot

esalad wrote: »

He does cook himself pasta in the evenings as I often come down to a sinkful of washing up to greet me first thing.

If I came down to that then DS would be dragged out of the bed by one ear (metaphorically speaking, he's a foot taller than me) ten seconds later and would be made to stand there in his PJs washing said dishes up. Fortunately this has never happened though...well, it's not that fortunate, actually. DS knows exactly what would happen if he assumed I was here to be his personal washing up slave.




If he's already out by the time you've got up and are facing his rancid mess, throw it into his bed and pull the duvet up. We used to do that to a particularly slobbish flatmate when we were students, we broke her of the habit in a week. Perhaps her mum didn't insist on her cleaning up after herself either? Truthfully though, you're not doing any future DIL a favour by letting him get away with this sort of thing. In ten years time she'll be on here moaning about your son's behaviour and blaming it firmly on his mother (that's you!) letting him get away with all these disrespectful habits.

seven-day-weekend

Teenage boys eat a LOT. I'm sure I read somewhere years ago that if they are having a growth spurt then they need around 4000 calories a day. So he is probably hungry. But also lazy like most teenagers, so will have the easiest thing he can find to eat (hence pies, pizzas etc).


I agree with giving him his own shelf full of protein-rich foods which he can fill up on. When it is empty he will have to replenish it out of his allowance. Also have carbs such as bread available for his use (as someone said above, a fish finger sandwich is tasty, filling, easy to prepare and not too unhealthy). Jacket potato with cheese and/or beans is good and simple too.

I can in a way understand why he doesn't ask 'because you will say no'. You WILL say no, won't you . I think this is just teenage logic and behaviour, tbh

I would also insist he washes up after himself otherwise his phone (or whatever else he holds dear) will be confiscated for a time.

Put a lock on the fridge that is reserved for family stuff.

jemb

!!!!!! not showing interest at 17 to get a job! He gets a job or no family allowance! I had to get a job at 16, to see the value of money, my parents didnt need the money from me, nor did they take it, but if they see that working 5 hours just gets you over £20 and how knackered they feel they are after that then they see the true value of what you do.

SingleSue

My eldest son was the worse out of mine, he needed (actually needed) huge quantities of food just to keep his weight stable and we are talking huge quantities, well outside the normal recommended amount.

His thyroid is fine, he has no bowel conditions or allergies/intolerances but we do think it is connected to his EDS and apart from pole fitness, is not sporty. It's costs him a huge amount at uni for food and even then, when he comes home he has become seriously underweight (I usually end up getting a delivery for him to boost his stores up from time to time). He can and does cook proper meals too, he just needs more of them than the normal person.

His middle brother on the other hand, can eat hardly anything, if he has the recommended amount, he puts weight on with it (we do know what causes it, linked to his various conditions). He is also far more active than his brother as he is a drummer. When he was younger and didn't quite understand the ramifications of eating, I used to have to lock things in the boot of my car. Locks on cupboards were useless as were doors, he would just rip them off the hinges.

Youngest son is just starting to go through the want to eat everything in sight thing (he is almost 17) but he holds himself back as he takes high dose steroids and struggles in the first place with keeping his weight stable (he is also really diddy so any extra pounds really really show), so he costs me a fortune in healthy snacks and fruit each week instead!