Partner has to go back to work after baby, but cant afford childcare

notanewuser

Could do with all relevant info in one post really.

haras_nosirrah

racon wrote: »

Hey, most of the mum's that we know, all except the odd few, say that they would love to be at home with their children. They feel that society forces them to do otherwise.
It is most doubtful that someone who earns NMW is going to be the next CEO of Sainsburys. Earning £9000 a year doesn't seem to suggest that they are high flyers in industry.
Oh? People actually go to work for the privilege of working even though for the hours they put in, receive very little if anything in financial reward?
Of course 2 year olds can be a handful, but isn't that the fun of being a parent?
Missing out on years of development of the child is a good thing? Sorry but as a parent and grandparent, I regret the hours spent having to work instead of being around the family. No amount of money can ever make up with the loss of seeing your child for up to 8 hours of their waking day.

I am not talking about someone putting their child in childcare full time. Most mums I know work part time myself included. The three days a week where I am not mummy, mummy, mummy leave me sane. I would go mad as a stay at home mum and have full respect for people who do it but I need more interaction with other people that is not baby talk and to have a life away from my child to be me rather than my son's mummy. I also have a career that I enjoy and that I take a lot of pride in.

I see my child 4 full days a week. I get the best of both worlds

haras_nosirrah

racon wrote: »

?
Of course 2 year olds can be a handful, but isn't that the fun of being a parent?

I can think of things that are more fun than a tantruming toddler. In fact doing my tax return is more fun than my child having a full on tantrum in the middle of tescos

Poppops

Why are you working 60 hours per week with no days off, for no overtime? This surely isn't written in to your contract of work.

From the gov.uk website:


The law says that workers don’t usually have to work more than 48 hours a week on average, unless they choose to. This law is sometimes called the ‘working time directive’ or ‘working time regulations’.

As someone has already said, you are working for less than minimum wage. Can you not discuss both hours of work and rate of pay with your employer?

FBaby

Something doesn't ring right with this post. For one, how did you go from a new job earning £35K to one paying under minimum wage? For two, are you saying that childcare cost £200 for three days (as that's what you say your wife is working). That's almost £70 a day, are you sure there isn't a cheaper alternative.

k3lvc

Is it only me who's struggling to understand how the OP is in this predicament ? If I read right OP was earning £30k and partner £9k - at some point around conception OP's salary dropped to £20k yet despite 9m to plan no savings/back up plan were made to cover maternity period other than an expectation that family members would care for child at no cost.

Priorities for me would be

Maximise income
- (reduce main role to 40hrs contracted and take 2nd p/t job)
- Partner to look at roles outside of core working hours to minimise childcare requirements
- ensure benefits claimed

Minimise expenditure
- absolute cull of unnecessary expenses - you can't afford them

When we had our kids we managed by saving pre-birth and building up a manageable amount of debt during maternity leave knowing that OH was returning to her old position on a salary far in excess of childcare costs

Good luck but be under no illusion kids are not cheap

racon

Poppops wrote: »

The law says that workers don’t usually have to work more than 48 hours a week on average, unless they choose to. This law is sometimes called the ‘working time directive’ or ‘working time regulations’.
?

Hey, the working time directive is only as good as the employer will allow/accept.
If you are told that you will be expected to work 60 hours a week there isn't much that you can do about it if you want to keep your job.
I spent 7 years working for a haulage company in the offices. If I managed to get 2 weeks holiday a year I was lucky. Although my hours were from 9am - 6pm x 5 days a week, being paid for 8 of them (lunch was unpaid), many was the time that I was called in at 4.30am and didn't leave until gone 7pm. Overtime didn't exist - it was simply the nature of both the business and the job.

Poppops

racon wrote: »

Hey, the working time directive is only as good as the employer will allow/accept.
If you are told that you will be expected to work 60 hours a week there isn't much that you can do about it if you want to keep your job.
I spent 7 years working for a haulage company in the offices. If I managed to get 2 weeks holiday a year I was lucky. Although my hours were from 9am - 6pm x 5 days a week, being paid for 8 of them (lunch was unpaid), many was the time that I was called in at 4.30am and didn't leave until gone 7pm. Overtime didn't exist - it was simply the nature of both the business and the job.

Not true.

The working time directive is applicable to almost all employees, junior doctors being one of the only exclusions, although they are still covered by the directive. The directive states that an employer can not force an employee to work more than an average of 48 hours over 17 weeks. The directive is part of employment law and must be adhered to. My company monitors employees all the time to make sure their average is under 48 hours.

You can opt out but it is your choice (and let's face it, you'd be mad to do so if you aren't being compensated for it) and must be done in writing. Interestingly, as you will see from the extract of the official guidelines I've posted below,, long distance lorry drivers are not allowed to opt out, so I hope that isn't what you did at the haulage company. You cannot be sacked for refusing to work more than the average 48 hours and a contract would not be legally put in place for more than that average.

Quote:

What are the exceptions to the maximum 48-hour working week?

Most employees are entitled not to work more than 48-hours per week averaged over a 17-week period. If you are a junior doctor, your 48-hour maximum is averaged out over a longer 26-week period.

However, it is possible for some employees to opt out of the 48-hour working week in order to be able to work longer hours, often for more pay.

Only workers aged 18 or over can opt out of the maximum 48-hour working week. The opt out must be voluntary, and must be in writing to be effective. You can choose to opt out for a specific period, or you may decide to opt out indefinitely.

Employers must ask employees whether they wish to opt out of the 48-hour maximum working week individually, not collectively. Employers must not discriminate against any individual who wishes not to opt out.

Can anyone opt out of the maximum 48-hour working week?

Certain workers are not allowed by law to opt out of the maximum 48-hour working week, these include:

Workers on boats and at sea
Airline staff
Delivery drivers and HGV drivers
Bus conductors and drivers
Security guards in high-value goods vehicles

notanewuser

Lots of workers are excluded from the 48 hour limit. Emergency service workers, armed forces personnel etc. not only that but anyone else can be expected to work more than 48 hours in emergency situations. It's rarely as simple as saying no.

racon

Poppops wrote: »

Not true.

The working time directive is applicable to almost all employees, junior doctors being one of the only exclusions, although they are still covered by the directive. The directive states that an employer can not force an employee to work more than an average of 48 hours over 17 weeks. The directive is part of employment law and must be adhered to. My company monitors employees all the time to make sure their average is under 48 hours.

You can opt out but it is your choice (and let's face it, you'd be mad to do so if you aren't being compensated for it) and must be done in writing. Interestingly, as you will see from the extract of the official guidelines I've posted below,, long distance lorry drivers are not allowed to opt out, so I hope that isn't what you did at the haulage company. You cannot be sacked for refusing to work more than the average 48 hours and a contract would not be legally put in place for more than that average.

Quote:

What are the exceptions to the maximum 48-hour working week?

Most employees are entitled not to work more than 48-hours per week averaged over a 17-week period. If you are a junior doctor, your 48-hour maximum is averaged out over a longer 26-week period.

However, it is possible for some employees to opt out of the 48-hour working week in order to be able to work longer hours, often for more pay.

Only workers aged 18 or over can opt out of the maximum 48-hour working week. The opt out must be voluntary, and must be in writing to be effective. You can choose to opt out for a specific period, or you may decide to opt out indefinitely.

Employers must ask employees whether they wish to opt out of the 48-hour maximum working week individually, not collectively. Employers must not discriminate against any individual who wishes not to opt out.

Can anyone opt out of the maximum 48-hour working week?

Certain workers are not allowed by law to opt out of the maximum 48-hour working week, these include:

Workers on boats and at sea
Airline staff
Delivery drivers and HGV drivers
Bus conductors and drivers
Security guards in high-value goods vehicles

Hey, no it was office based. But if there were drivers short I was expected to cover those loads. As for it all being tied up in a nice bundle, there are many, my employer included where everyone knew that if you did not carry out what was asked of you - well you know where the door is.
For the sake of keeping a job, you did what you were told.