The KonMarie method

mavvymoo

Morning all
Hugs to everyone who needs them.I think Christmas is a very hard time of year for everyone. Thinking about people who didnt make this year. Either friends you thought you had and it turned out that you didnt for some reason only known to them.:( Or people you lost along the way due to illness I lost a very good friend of mine just before Christmas last year and I miss him He was a runner at my club but a friend before he roped me in to running:DHe was the one who told me I could do it and I never thought I could but he was right I can and I do.

We have a boxing day dip in the North sea here :eek: and this year it is in his memory and all proceeds to his charity. So yes if you see the photos anywhere( they will be out there) and there is a women dressed as a fairy :eek: freezing but with a determined look on her face that will be me :T A 5k run before that and then I will swim in that cold North Sea and enjoy every minute of it

So thank you Alec you taught me a lot xxx


Mav x

PollyWollyDoodle

What a great way to remember him ... you're never going to forget him.

silvasava

Can't say how much these recent posts have helped me to come to terms with a friend of 40+ years who has cold shouldered me. Like many of you I've struggled to see if I've done anything inadvertantly to hurt her (no!) I've tried to keep the connection for the last 2/3 years but I'm letting it go albeit sadly.
Mavvy - Go Girl - what a lovely friend you had and how you must miss him. Wonderful way for you and his friends to remember him. I'll be sending you warming vibes on Boxing Day!
Lots of little jobs to get done today. DH's Sat Nav is having a wobble - the screen calibration is off & anything on the right side has disappeared so its packed up ready to return today. Weather report looks good for today so need to get out in the garden to tidy up, plant up window boxes & do some Kondoing in the greenhouse.
Have a good day all x

selement

Still here but haven't posted in a while, clothes are still sitting in a black bag in the bedroom... Got Xmas decs up though and we threw out some stuff from the living room on the way (not properly kondoing just a quick reorganisation). I started a postgraduate module at work so as much as I want to kondo at this point it's close to deadlines and would be procrastinating so it's banned until after the submission date!
Ive been frustrated with a few friendships this year, a few that live in different cities we've done the whole 'we should meet up sometime ' thing and it never happens. I tried to leave the ball very clearly in their court 'tell us when you are free we'll make it happen ' and sort of success? One couple we didn't meet up with but we are
about to attend their wedding (evening only) so at least we'll see them then and they still think enough of us to invite us! Another we have made plans for January so hopefully they will happen. We have a fixed date and have agreed we will go to her.
Friendship is an awkward thing for me, I'm a bit shy and lack confidence. I fell out with or became distant from my close friendship group from school. I'm not blameless or totally at fault. 2 of the girls I met up with last year and it was nice, but we've only done it twice in 5 years. One of them isn't interested, the other has threatened me previously so I would not meet up with her if begged (unfairly I might add! She's just mental.)
Friendships as adults is not so easy! I have a couple of newer friends but they do feel a bit acquaintancey still. I have no idea how to get closer to them!
Sorry got a bit off topic there.
I am looking forward to next year I will kondo the house, plan a wedding, and continue saving for a house whilst planning after wedding adventures

Blue_Doggy

Congratulations to all those who have finished at least the first pass at a total MK of their homes! I'm still in the "struggling" phase but will get there, and couldn't do it without the good examples on here.

So thank you, one and all!!

I'm also impressed by a sub-theme which seems to be developing of people's OHes suddenly seeing some Kondo-light and voluntarily offering up clutter for disposal. Great going.

I am trying to Kondo some "Christmas Card Friends", the sort who are only ever in touch with a card at Christmas. There are not many, but we were at school together and have not met since except at a reunion about 30 years ago. I keep "not sending a card unless I get one from them", but then (bah humbug!)one does arrive from them. I suppose I should be tough and not send one back ....

On the Kondo/tidying front, I'm trying to excavate my dining table in time for Christmas, it's currently covered in miscellaneous paperwork from this year. I make forays in to it, and get bits sorted (it's one of the sources for lots of the magazines I threw out thanks to Min's Game). Wish me luck as I dive in again!

mrs-moneypenny

Evening all
Been at work all day so only just got in iPad is being difficult and will only let me get in through Google rather than direct through server, I just keep getting a server doesn't want to play message.
Big box of mosaic making stuff Kondoed to school this morning and a football table is heading their way tonight once Dh gets home.

Hugs to all that me them, I have to go and do food now, then once footy table gone I'll do some wrapping.

fpcat

My OH has discovered (or invented ) Reverse Kondoing. I have done my kitchen, and took to the CS about 20 mugs, and left about 12. There are 2 of us, so that's enough for a day if we don't get to washing up! That was about 6 weeks ago. I came back from a CS run on Friday to a beaming OH who proudly displayed 10 mugs which he had found for 20p each at another CS. I almost cried. I don't think he realised how much it upset me. He's also rescued a new to us cat crate for taking the cat to the vet. He's mended the slight crack and he's declared it as good as new. Our cats always went to the vet in a sports bag, with the zip opened, so a proper crate for them would be a big upgrade, IF we had a cat now. It's currently sitting taking space in the hall, he's going to offer to son, who already has one, or the Cat people. If the cat lady here needs one (I know she has one, I've brought her home from the vets) it's going there. Then Freecycle I guess. I'll swear he's a secret hoarder, I'll never get him on side. No major kondoing now until 2016, I like everyone else have other things to do. Still sneaking things out as I find them, but otherwise RL taking over.

mavvymoo

Morning all from a very wet and windy (again) Norfolk

fpcat Well what can I say only that I feel your pain.I am sure you will find someone who would love the cat basket.As for the mugs do they spark joy ? If not I would return them to the charity shop and if DH sees you doing that he may think twice about bringing [STRIKE] carp[/STRIKE] unwanted treasures back into your house again

I still havent purchased anything for Christmas :rotfl:I do have 4 cards which will need writing at some point if I get the urge as I dont find it joyful and think its a waste of my time when I could be doing something else instead

I know some of you have been talking of people wanting to remove themselves from your life. and you wondering what you have done.
well my cousin who lives in Oz who came over and spent 3 weeks here with us last Aug who I havent seen for 20years. and we used to be so close growing up as there was only 3 weeks between us in age.When she came over it was like we had never been apart and when she went home it was like losing my sister really.
She emailed when she got home and said she had booked flights etc for Aug this year and she emailed with all her news,rung each other every week or so. In March the contact just stopped and despite me emailing and ringing I have heard nothing. Aug came and went and still nothing :eek:

I have not heard another word from either her or my Aunt and Uncle who also live in Oz. All so strange and now I am wondering if I said something or did something to upset them.its just so odd I dont know what to do really.But wait and see if I get a Christmas card from any of them.
So just to let you all know its not just you going though the feeling you have been pushed out It happens to us all at some point I think.

Mav x

PollyWollyDoodle

Gosh that's worrying. I will say that there have been times - illness, bereavement, divorce - when I've just been unable to speak to friends or tell people what was going on. We sometimes fear that others will judge us and to avoid that we withdraw from them. I hope you hear from your cousin soon.

I honestly don't think I've ever dropped someone on the basis of a single conversation or letter. I hope not anyway.

It's very quiet on here lately, I think everyone's probably busy with RL, I seem to be going out a lot more than usual. Iqueen, give us a wave to let us know you're ok?

selement

PollyWollyDoodle wrote: »

Gosh that's worrying. I will say that there have been times - illness, bereavement, divorce - when I've just been unable to speak to friends or tell people what was going on. We sometimes fear that others will judge us and to avoid that we withdraw from them. I hope you hear from your cousin soon.

I honestly don't think I've ever dropped someone on the basis of a single conversation or letter. I hope not anyway.

It's very quiet on here lately, I think everyone's probably busy with RL, I seem to be going out a lot more than usual. Iqueen, give us a wave to let us know you're ok?

It feels so unfair to drop someone with no explanation doesn't it? No chance to defend whatever caused upset or to apologise for it... I could never drop a close friend this way. I did think I could never drop anyone this way but I did drop the one friend...
I think friend is a stretch in the first place. We met and mainly chatted online, at one point he was interested in me I was never interested back, we lived in same city so met in real life by accident a couple times. We were Facebook friends, I unfriended him when his Facebook got too covered in bnp things for my liking (plus most of our 'friendship' was based on him liking me, he'd since been married I was in a long term relationship... He demanded an explanation on Facebook but I didn't want the argument about him being a racist !!!!! (I did bring it up once before and he wasn't having it) I kinda figured we're not close anyway...
Other friends I've lost touch with have been a mutual slowly stop talking to each other... Never blanked anyone else with no explanation!

I reckon a lot of these blankers are afraid of confrontation which is why they won't explain why. Frustrating though isn't it when most the time you'd just apologise and try to fix it rather than get annoyed?