Should I insist cats are rehomed ?

MrsHB · 2 January 2015 at 11:22PM

A very long story shortened but when my husband moved in to my house he had two cats , they use a litter tray indoors and generally are nice pets although they generally don't let me make much of a fuss of them. the problem is my husband has very low standards of cleanliness which extends to his cats. After a row about this on New Years day he has spent the last two days in the (single bed) cat room accompanied by a litter tray that hasn't been cleaned for a week and what looks like vomit in three places on the carpet (recently replaced at my expense) there are two further half heartedly cleaned vomit stains on the landing and I discovered a pile down the side of my dressing table. I know I could clean it up but it is just an illustration of what keeps happening so I'm not prepared to do it - I think I'm at the stage where I'm going to insist the cats are rehomed as he is just not taking good care of them - there are about six stinking cans of empty cat food in with them too. This isn't acceptable is it ? Pet ownership is not just putting a dish of cat food out twice a day - the furniture and walls in there are covered in bits of food. I try to have a nice home but this is just getting me down , having to replace carpets and generally feeling disrespected

Beckyboo22 · 2 January 2015 at 11:26PM

Hello! I'll be honest honey, this while situation sounds bloody awful! You seem like a decent lady with reasonable standards of cleanliness, your other half....not so much! All animals should be cared for in loving and clean environments that are changed daily. Leaving old food and cat vomit is just unhealthy!
I would say your partner needs a swift kick up the backside, to be brutally honest, and the cats given to homes that will love and care for their needs.
I hope this all works out for you in the end xx

MrsHB · 2 January 2015 at 11:36PM

Yes there are certainly more issues to be addressed but it's the cats that are my concern - it looks like my relationship may have to come to an end but that's a whole different topic !

My concern is their welfare , they are lovely things and I worry that if he decides he's moving out too they'll go back to living in the absolute squalor they used to live in - I insist they are wormed and flea treated now but think this wouldn't happen.

I have a Chronic illness and on immunosuppressants which is another reason I shouldn't be cleaning up after them as at huge risk of infection

Just not sure I'm over reacting , deep down I know I'm not really just at my wits end with it all

springdreams · 2 January 2015 at 11:46PM

Sorry to hear you are going through such a bad time OP.

To be honest if your relationship is going to be dissolved, there is nothing to stop your husband getting more pets if you rehome the cats he currently has, and he then moves out of your house.

So although I do feel for you, the cats and your current dilemma, I don't think rehoming the cats is going to solve any longer term issues that are likely to arise.

trolleyrun · 2 January 2015 at 11:47PM

I'm not the most houseproud person in the world, but I would find this level of uncleanliness horrid and unacceptable. They're his cats, so he should take more of a responsibility of looking after them. I have a dog (have had cats in the past) and any mess she decides to make, however rarely, is cleaned up immediately. It sounds to me that the cats would get looked after better in a different home, sorry to say.

Beckyboo22 · 2 January 2015 at 11:50PM

I certainly don't think you are over reacting. To be fair I think you should be putting your health first honey. You should be in a nice clean environment being loved! Sod the cats! (I kid, I'm a big animal person

) maybe sitting down and having a quiet heart to heart may help? Or from personal experience writing a letter can achieve amazing things in a relationship. You can't shout at a letter! (I know men that can and will though

) again I really hope this all works out for you, feel free to message me if you want a chat, or just to get things off your chest!
Becky x

GwylimT · 3 January 2015 at 9:32AM

Not giving animals an appropriate place to defecate is neglect, as is not taking an ill animal to the vet, if continues like this he needs to get rid, all pets deserve a good home.

gunsandbanjos · 3 January 2015 at 10:51AM

In all honesty I'd be getting rid of the husband and keeping the cats!

Though as you say that's not practical with your medical condition so I would say they would probably be better off being rehomed with someone that will look after them properly.

Just taking them to a shelter though is likely to end in them being put down.

catkins · 3 January 2015 at 2:09PM

Although the cats are not being looked after properly and it doesn't sound as though they have a great life, the alternative is quite likely that they will be put down.

All cat rescues are full to overflowing. Older cats are not easy to home as lots of people want kittens (don't know how old the cats are).

I got 2 sisters just over two years ago as their owners could not keep them. They were 14 years old and NO rescue was willing to take them as they all said they would probably never be able to rehome them.

I read about them on Facebook as their owners were desperate to find them a home (preferably together) and not have them put down. To be honest I really did not want any more cats (had 3 at the time) but could not bear to think of them being put to sleep or, if they could find homes, separated after 14 years of living together.

PasturesNew · 3 January 2015 at 3:20PM

The cats need to now live outside - as does your husband. Buy him and them a shed and tell him he's out there until he works out his lifestyle choices and amends them to be more in line with your own thinking.