A year to make a difference

FIGHTER

chevalier wrote: »

Welcome to the boards. Well done on realising that you need to get yourself sorted. I really hope that you get something workwise, now that xmas and new year are out of the way. What line of work are you in? There maybe someone on here who can help you tweek a cv.

chev

Hi Chevalier.
I work in transport admin. I had a job with fantastic pay but I was having panic attacks at work and I was deemed not fit to work. But I want to work. I know what causes my panic attacks but being able to rid myself off the thing that causes it is not straight forward.
I need something full time with a decent salary ( don't we all)
With three kids childcare is very pricey.

I woke up today with bad stomach ache. Think I definitely indulged over xmas
Doesn't help my body being out of sync cos my son won't sleep

I'm going to clear the rent arrears later. Then see if theres anything to make a PAD to, to the council tax bill.

mismatch

hi fighter
nice to see someone else just enjoying being able to have a diary to keep on track. I started a new one on jan 1 to hopefully do the same as we start an iva and learn to live without credit to "save" us. I've subbed to see how you get along. good luck

FIGHTER

mismatch wrote: »

hi fighter
nice to see someone else just enjoying being able to have a diary to keep on track. I started a new one on jan 1 to hopefully do the same as we start an iva and learn to live without credit to "save" us. I've subbed to see how you get along. good luck

I agree its nice to have somewhere to write it all down and keep on track more easily.
I would like to sort my credit file as I would like a mortgage in the future but the most important thing to me at the moment is just making a change to my personal and getting straight with the household bills

FIGHTER

I'm up!! I say i'm up but I never went to bed
having serious troubles getting my three year old to sleep at the moment. he is so full of energy and I've tried everything. just got back from taking him for a drive and he's finally gone to sleep. shame I can't. My new Tumble Dryer is coming between 7am and 10am. be so glad to get it. my old one broke before Christmas typically. my mother came to my rescue and ordered me another. although its taken nearly 2 weeks to get it here I have some serious washing to get through.


so I have been thinking a lot about me lately. I don't think about me very often but I am certainly set on doing so now. off course my kids will always come first but I had my forst child 12 years ago and I kind off lost myself. I do find myself asking myself 'who am i'?
so baby steps, going to get my eyebrows waxed later if I can get an appointment. yes I could save money doing it myself but I am trying to improve my appearance and I honestly cannot pluck my eyebrows. I am terrible at this beauty stuff
obviously I have bigger plans for my overhaul, but I won't bore you with the details. I just think that within myself, I am not a happy person and to be a happy person I need to start with me and remind myself that yes I am a mother but I am still a person, I am me, and I need to take better care of my health, although this sleep deprivation thing absolutely sucks


I made a £1 payment to council tax earlier just to annoy them. we don't have a good relationship, mainly due to the lies there employees tell but i'll say no more


off to get a brew and to try and relax before I wake the other kiddies for the school run


have a great day everyone

judi24

hello Fighter - hope you have a good day even though you have had little sleep! Sleep deprivation is awful especially if you have kids to look after. Do you have any help with your 3 year old in relation to his sleep?


I completely get the 'loosing me' bit when you have kids and work etc do you have any good friends that can socialise with? or any interests you can do that would get you feeling a bit better (cheap of course!!)


Can you address the anxiety that is stopping you work?


Keep posting a diary does help me focus on what I am trying to do

FIGHTER

judi24 wrote: »

hello Fighter - hope sleep. Im gove a good day even though you have had little sleep! Sleep deprivation is awful especially if you have kids to look after. Do you have any help with your 3 year old in relation to his sleep?


I completely get the 'loosing me' bit when you have kids and work etc do you have any good friends that can socialise with? or any interests you can do that would get you feeling a bit better (cheap of course!!)


Can you address the anxiety that is stopping you work?


Keep posting a diary does help me focus on what I am trying to do

Hi Judy

Thank you for your reply. still not had any sleep. Think I'm going to try control crying tonight. I am so tired I could cry

I can address the anxiety issue but the consequences of me doing so are not going to be goods.


Got my eyebrows done today and tomorrow ls task is to get some hair stripper.
I do hopr I get some well earned sleep tonight xx

FIGHTER

I should have called this diary the ramblings of....
My son is asleep so vety shortly I shall be in dreamland and I should hoping to get a good 8 hours tonight. He starts nursery on friday so it was imperative that I get the little monster settled properly.

I have made a £6 payment to council tax today shared between both bills.
Panicking because my rent statement is saying I'm £500 odd in arrears because the hb payment hasn't hit yet I hope its all ok. II'm sure it is I paid through allpay as always and I have my bank statement.

Right bed for me

Take care

judi24

Hope you get a good rest

FIGHTER

judi24 wrote: »

Hope you get a good rest

But not as much as i planned. He was up at 12.30 am
And wouldn't settle. Its like he just need a small recharge then hes off again.
I think I'm going to need so.e professional advice.i feel like a zombie

FIGHTER

Well I got some sleep eventually. just a shame me and my son slept through most of today but it was very much needed and he slept in his own bed which just shows he can do it he just chooses not too.
don't know how he will settle tonight but at the moment I am just grateful to not feel like the walking dead


I've also stripped my hair so my transformation is underway
I am joining slimming world next Thursday. I have seen a lot of success stories so I am hopeful. I just need to keep some willpower
I have been job hunting and had a couple of call backs today which I missed due to being asleep but they are from agencies and unless they can give me permanent work I can't commit
I have worked for agencies before and they can drop you at any time. I need stability. not just for me but the kids as well


paid my mum some money towards the new tumble dryer today. its been a godsend, not looking forward to the ironing though