Evicting a family member

Takeaway_Addict

pinkshoes wrote: »

Your son is a lodger, so has no rights.

Just write him a letter saying that you are going to be selling the house, so are giving him and his partner 1 month notice to find somewhere else to live, expiring on 25th January.

After this date, just change the locks when he is out, and put his stuff into bags for him to collect.

Are you sure? It sounds like the OP doesn't live there

Mojisola

pinkshoes wrote: »

Your son is a lodger, so has no rights.

He isn't a lodger unless statex is living in the house as well.

moneyistooshorttomention

I just have this feeling you might give way to your wifes (understandable) fears about losing touch with grandchildren and therefore let him to continue to see you as a soft touch.

At the very very least (ie if you do decide to take view of "anything for a quiet life") then you would need to draw up some form of rental agreement, if only to charge a peppercorn rent of a nominal £1 per year to him and that way, as I understand it, there would be no risk of him gaining ownership of your house.

However, I agree with the others that you do need to put your foot down and give him notice. He has had a very generous amount of time in which to "get his act together" and get his own place sorted out for himself and I would say, without a bomb being put under his backside, he will continue to treat this 2nd house of yours as his forever more.

Put it another way....if you let him continue to stay there, then you are leaving a problem to your other children come the time they are due to get whatever-inheritance-you-plan-to-leave-them. The reason being he will likely insist on staying put and make his siblings fight him to get him out and I'm not sure how I would rate their chances of succeeding.

Whereas, right now, its clearly your house and your right to remove him and you should be able to do so without too much trouble.

I doubt very much he would stop you seeing your grandchildren. After all, he will doubtless still want the free childcare and probably has little (if any) access to free childcare otherwise:cool:

Add the fact that you are very much the same agegroup as I am and we're not getting any younger are we? If you are going to make major changes to your life...then you really need to get on with it....ie before the risk of greater age/infirmity goes up too much for you. It's surprising how much energy (physical or emotional) it takes to do work on a "new to you" house and make a new life generally. Get on with it before you get any older.

FatVonD

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Put it another way....if you let him continue to stay there, then you are leaving a problem to your other children come the time they are due to get whatever-inheritance-you-plan-to-leave-them. The reason being he will likely insist on staying put and make his siblings fight him to get him out and I'm not sure how I would rate their chances of succeeding.

This poster makes a very good point, if you have time, do look up Gingernutty's thread to see how this could all pan out.

Timeflies

When you say you can't get them out of the house - what response did you get when you previously asked them to leave?

Was it a "oh Dad we just need another month til the carpets are down" or just a straight out "no"? 4 years is really taking the rip - their new house must be liveable by now. Very few people could afford to run two houses for so long, and your son is only able to do so because you're letting him stay in one for free. I think you should be very firm with him and tell him you're putting it up for sale, and he should move into his other house ASAP. A few weeks should be enough to sort any jobs that urgently need finishing. Most young families put up with living in the house they're refurbishing.

If you are giving him childcare for 5 days a week, it would appear he is very reliant on that. I wouldn't expect him to stop that arrangement to spite you. A lot of grandparents would give childcare one or two days a week, but 5 is really generous.

pinkshoes

Mojisola wrote: »

He isn't a lodger unless statex is living in the house as well.

I read it as the OP comes and goes as she pleases from the house with childcare etc... So could be seen as still living there. I assume she has a key and can just enter, thus making this more like a lodger relationship rather than a tenant.

Perhaps the op should move back in for a while to make the lodger relationship clear??

Mojisola

pinkshoes wrote: »

I read it as the OP comes and goes as she pleases from the house with childcare etc... So could be seen as still living there. I assume she has a key and can just enter, thus making this more like a lodger relationship rather than a tenant.

No, it couldn't - just doesn't fit the definition of lodger and LL.

jen1301

So your son doesn't pay for childcare or any rent...he's definitely taking advantage. Just get him out of the house. He has no 'rights' and I've surprised you've put up with this situation for as long as you have. I would also remove him from any will if I were you..harsh maybe but I think he's already had more than enough from you.

Homeownertobe

pinkshoes wrote: »

I read it as the OP comes and goes as she pleases from the house with childcare etc... So could be seen as still living there. I assume she has a key and can just enter, thus making this more like a lodger relationship rather than a tenant.

Perhaps the op should move back in for a while to make the lodger relationship clear??

Perhaps you should be more careful with your dangerous advice?

Gingernutty

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Put it another way....if you let him continue to stay there, then you are leaving a problem to your other children come the time they are due to get whatever-inheritance-you-plan-to-leave-them. The reason being he will likely insist on staying put and make his siblings fight him to get him out and I'm not sure how I would rate their chances of succeeding.

Whereas, right now, its clearly your house and your right to remove him and you should be able to do so without too much trouble.

FatVonD wrote: »

This poster makes a very good point, if you have time, do look up Gingernutty's thread to see how this could all pan out.

Yep. And my story ended well. Eventually.

Why has he spent the last four years in your house?

Are they renting theirs out?

You need the money (he's taken all of yours), you're not making him or his family homeless and there's no question as to who owns the house - the title is yours.

Go for it.