Labour- didn't know what to do/what was going on with my body - anyone else the same?

Mics_chick

I had my dd in June 03 & my ds in January 05 and really struggled through both deliveries with panic attacks, hyperventilating, etc.

Has anyone had similar experiences to me...?
I'd love to hear them if you don't mind sharing them

missylou_2

Em,

not relly sure if this counts, but my G.P. sent me away with a flea in my ear as I was apparently only suffering from indigestion! (my son arrived less than 24 hours later!)

TheWaltons_3

At the time I had my first child, I suffered very badly with anxiety and panic attacks and was paranoid I would be a hysterical mess when in labour. I wasn't. I coped fine, with a little help from Pethidine and was actually very quiet and chilled out with my first.

I also had a Twin Labour and as soon as I started bleeding (I thought it was my waters) everywhere, everyone around me panicked and I was in a terrible state of anxiety. They put a canula in my hand and I was questioning everything (why are you doing this? You didn't do it with my first labour) and panicking, getting into a right state. They gave me Gas and Air which I clutched and would NOT give back, even after an epidural but the kind anaesthetist told the Nurse to let me have it!

I wouldn't like to imagine what kind of state I would have been in, should I not have received pain relief though. How come you didn't get any?

inkie

A a midwife,the key to minimising situations ike this occuring has tobe information information, information all the way. Then if things get a bit hairy all are aware of what is happening. I advocate giving as much information as I can every step of the way - it develops trust and partnership working, and when intervention is genuinely indicated leads to your professional views being respected.
Can't understand practitioners who 'keep things back'. I have seen lots of women suffering from a kind of post-traumatic stress following difficult deliveries, and had to be debriefed.

Elle00

Err, I took the coward's way out...

I knew I wouldn't cope and was just too scared and sick of being worried all the time so I was booked in for a caesarean at 39wks.

The only nice part of my pregnancy and labour (I went early at 35+5) was the birth. It was pretty bad having the epidural purely because it was hard to maintain the position but the anaesthatist was a pro who calmly explained to me what he was going to do then just got on with it. I just lay there in a total state of calm, all the pain I had been in for the last 30 odd weeks was gone and my birth experience was relaxed and easy.

I had been very worried I might resent the baby after the birth because of how sick I'd been (long story) but thankfully it was just so relaxed and easy that it got me off to a good start with being a new Mum. I remember laying in my bed that first day and just feeling so relieved and happy it was all over and I had a beautiful healthy baby (early but 7lbs and perfectly formed - probably matured quicker because of my stress levels unfortunately).

A natural labour is the best option medically for everyone who can cope with it but I think my section was right for me personally. I think some of us unfortunately just do not cope in a normal way where stress and unpredictability are concerned. Before anyone jumps on me for daring to be honest - I have a medically recognised condition and work very hard to be a good Mum and "normal" person.

clairewp

Mics_chick wrote: »

I had my dd in June 03 & my ds in January 05 and really struggled through both deliveries with panic attacks, hyperventilating, etc.

Has anyone had similar experiences to me...?
I'd love to hear them if you don't mind sharing them

With my ds now10 it took 16 hrs so my body had time to adjust and cope with pain etc, but my dd now6 decided to come in 45 min so my body and me went into total shock and no i didnt cope screamed for whole 45 min after being offered a paracetamol

Welshlassie

I'm due my first baby any day and must say 5/6 weeks ago I was terrified. I have since spoken to my mum, several friends with new babies and been to parentcraft classes provided by the hospital and am now actually looking forward to the birth.

As a woman your body if designed specifically to do this thing (giving birth) there is nothing more natural. The more information you have about how a birth can go (good and bad) the more prepared you will be and the "easier" you will find the build up and birth. I had a false labouron Wednesday (5 hours of contractions and then stopped so still waiting for the real thing), but the thing that surprised me the most was how calm I felt - I'm a real worrier normally and can get quite stressed, but looking at times I do get stressed its when I don't know what to expect. Reading books, talking to people and especially your midwife will all help.

Try to think about what you would like to happen in labour, but be flexible it won't always go according to plan, that's fine as well, just understand in advance the possible routes it could take and then it shouldn't seem so scary if you have to go down one of these.

I'm really hoping for a water birth, but if I find I can't have or manage this then I'm not ruling out an epidural (although ideally I would prefer just gas and air).

Talk your fears over with babies father (or whoever your birthing partner is), its their job to support you and if they know you are particularly auxious about something they can speak on your behalf if you aren't up to it.

Best of luck and try and enjoy (as weird as that sounds)

positivelymummy

i read every book, watched every programme etc and when i went into labour i had no idea! i was completely in shock, it actually felt like i blanked out every time i had a contraction, i was just so overwhelmed etc, i just froze and felt i couldnt even communicate with anyone or bear having anyone near me, not even OH/midwife/dr etc,(long long labour with baby facing wrong way, was it face to bum/front? cant remember) anyhow, they gave me diamorphine but it was too much for me, i was too far out of it, and couldnt stop spewing, but i was so spaced out i couldn;t even grab hold of the bowl to spew in!) couldn;t even push/baby head still twisted so vontuese delivery/then placenta got stuck (retained placenta) and striaght to theatre for emergency removal! i instisted they didn;t put me to sleep so had spinal anesthetic for op and i spewed throughout the whole operation, the dr/anesthatist had to hold the bowls throughout the op for me.....oops i'm rambling:D i hated my labour, i was very distressed for a long time afterwards, i felt truly robbed of a good birthing experience, in fact if i'm truly honest i'll say my bad labour almost certainly contributed to Post Natal Depression, and thankfully 2nd time round was a slightly better.

joanne0620

The best advice I was given was not to panic (easier said than done I know!:rolleyes: ) I had DS in October last year with 1 shot of pethidine (I'm not boasting as I was asking for an epidural but was told I was too far gone, and then telling the midwife to "just get the plunger (meant ventouse!) and pull him out!" )

The previous posters have already said that the better informed you are as to what can happen the better. I consider that I had a good birthing experience and a good labour, purely because it was quick IMO (5hrs from waters going) I don't think I could have coped with a long labour

missylou_2

missylou wrote: »

Em,

not relly sure if this counts, but my G.P. sent me away with a flea in my ear as I was apparently only suffering from indigestion! (my son arrived less than 24 hours later!)

Sorry for any who may have thought the above comment was flippant, this experience occure just befor 27 weeks gestation during first pregnancy, I hade not reached the stage where any birth planning had even been mentioned, and I found it a totally terrifying experience. However at a later stage my G.p. did comment that at least I was spared the horrific stretch marks and loose skin that a full term pregnancy can bring! I think I was supposed to be happy at this point?

inkie

Quote:
Originally Posted by missylou
Em,

not relly sure if this counts, but my G.P. sent me away with a flea in my ear as I was apparently only suffering from indigestion! (my son arrived less than 24 hours later!)

Sorry for any who may have thought the above comment was flippant, this experience occure just befor 27 weeks gestation during first pregnancy, I hade not reached the stage where any birth planning had even been mentioned, and I found it a totally terrifying experience. However at a later stage my G.p. did comment that at least I was spared the horrific stretch marks and loose skin that a full term pregnancy can bring! I think I was supposed to be happy at this point?

All the more reason for people to have a good relationship with the experts (midwives for normal and obstetricians for high risk). I recognise that there are some good GPs who take pride in obstetric care, but I have worked with may GPs who would hold their hands up and let us midwives get on with it, us being the experts in normal childbirth.