A new debt free journey

BettyBones

Hi LCC, I've just read your diary from start to finish (started at 10pm last night, put it down around 11.30pm, picked it up again at 8am this morning and have just finished. Phew!) It's such an inspirational read I couldn't put it down! Despite all your ups and downs you've stuck at it, no matter what obstacles have come your way, and it really does inspire me to stick with my own debt busting, no matter what. Have a fab time in Devon.. you totally deserve the break!

lcc86

Hi Bettybones, thanks for reading, looks like I bored you to sleep! :rotfl: lol. Thank you for your kind comments it's very much appreciated.

Devon was amazing, I had such a great time. I'm aching all over and was incredibly tired when I got home, but all worth it. I bought myself a couple of bits for the house as well and still came home with money to spare. That money has gone into my Ibiza fund which is now looking much more healthy! Should be able to get another £200 in there before the time comes.

On the house front, I went to look at the flats I had seen online, and they weren't as good as I'd hoped. estate agents can be deceptive with their picture taking I guess! I did like one of them, but not enough to move if I'm honest. I think I just got carried away with it all and had kind of decided that I wanted to live there before I'd even seen it. I am concerned about the future and the possibility of these impending building works impacting on our lives here, but really I need to sort my debt out and get my head out of the clouds and back to reality.

Right, today's jobs involve lots of cleaning and getting the house in order, what with being away a lot over the last few weeks I've just let it slide completely. Luckily I have today off so no excuses!

lcc86

I'm having a bit of a meh feeling this morning. I guess I have the post holiday blues! Just keep thinking about how much easier life would be without this pesky debt hanging over my head! There's just so many things I want to do in life but it generally comes back to not being able to do so because of my debt. Of course I just need to suck it up and get on with it, everybody here is in that same position, and I really do have an awful lot to be grateful for so I just need to snap out of it!

This month I plan to pay £200 off my credit card. We're also applying to have OH put on the mortgage officially, so have to pay out for that. I hadn't realised it would cost in the region of £700 until the mortgage advisor told me the other day! But after it's done OH will be contributing a bit more, so that should help with the finances. If I'm strict I could clear my debt a little quicker.

In other news I've also been formally accepted onto my masters programme to start in October. It was a conditional offer prior to this but I've now met all the criteria they want. Very nervous about it. I really hope I do better than my last attempt!! This will also keep me occupied come October and hopefully stop me spending unnecessarily hehe.

Right, time to cheer up, cancel the pity party and do some work!

lcc86

Finances are still looking good this month so no particular concerns. I spent yesterday sitting at a local viewpoint studying, it was so nice to spend time outside. OH and I went out for dinner, he paid as it's my birthday in a couple of days (30!! :eek:) so a free evening for me. Today I've treated myself to a £3 bar of my favourite chocolate and a £15 pair of trainers as well as a little gift to myself

I was talking to my dad the other day about the cost of putting OH on the mortgage and I think we've decided to leave it until such time as we move. It makes sense to save ourselves that money now, as we'll have to pay legal fees as and when we move in future anyway so why pay twice? I hadn't realised just how expensive it would be! But such is life, OH is happy to wait so it's no biggy. I'll still go to the appointment tomorrow and see if I can shave a couple of years off the term. If they want fees for that too then I will explore options like overpaying instead. Hopefully they won't want more money but you never know with banks!

lcc86

Had my mortgage appt today, I asked about upping my payments by £50 a month, they did the calculations and it'll cut my term by 8 years :beer: So I accepted that right away! Of course I'll move one day so things might change but I'm chuffed with that.

Bit of irritating news as well, BT told me they'd billed me incorrectly for broadband after I'd cancelled my service, anyway they've since told me that the bill is right and have applied a late payment fee (I hadn't paid it because they'd told me it was an error). Cue a complaint first thing this morning. We'll see what happens. Not going to let it ruin my MSE day!

lcc86

Feeling really thoroughly fed up this evening OH and I spoke prior to the mortgage appointment and I said to him that if we keep things as they are to save on fees, can he contribute a bit more than he does now to help out? I do earn more than him so I don't expect to split things exactly 50/50 but as it stands I pay for probably 85% of everything and that's not proportionate to his earnings. He didn't object, but now I've got it all sorted and have agreed to pay a little more each month, he's saying he can't afford it. This is the same man who goes on about 5 holidays a year. My bills aren't particularly expensive, I was only asking for another £100 a month. Anyway, I'm absolutely fuming but don't have the energy to argue with him right now. I'm so disappointed. It's made me realise that I really am on my own when it comes to my finances. I feel stupid because he was the one who convinced me it was a good idea to stay here where we live now even though he knows how stressed I am about the upcoming building work and the potential effect it could have on our lives. But I stupidly let him talk me into it and then he pulls this little stunt.

I know he can afford it, that's the most infuriating part. He goes on so many holidays, eats takeaway at least once a week, puts a few small bets on football matches, and only buys branded goods. But I felt guilty for raising these kinds of things because he's never been in debt and I have, and I felt bad for imposing 'my' rules on him. Now I wish I hadn't bothered. I certainly won't be buying him branded food any more that's for sure! I don't normally come on here to talk about emotional matters but this has just really got to me and I can't sleep now. It's making me rethink everything tbh. If I'm on my own now financially when he has no financial commitment to speak of then what hope do I have in future of making him step up? Particularly when he says one thing and does another!! He makes me look a complete fool and it's really upset me if I'm honest. Ironically we were meant to go on a date night on Saturday (which I paid for as part of his Xmas present) but I'd rather lose the money right now.

Either way I can't talk to him because I'm nagging or moaning or whatever and he doesn't engage in an adult conversation. He either just doesn't respond at all or shouts and storms out when he hears things he doesn't like. When I think of all my couple friends, they're not in situations where one practically supports the other for no reason. Last year I wanted him to move in with me so much that I probably set the bar lower than I should've done and now I'm paying for it. But it's not like we have kids and one has to be the main earner and bill payer. I don't know... I have to think about things. If he won't contribute then I'm not supporting him any more and he can move back in with his parents. But that will probably be the end of it and mean I've wasted the last 7 years. Trouble is, right now I feel like I've wasted the last 7 years anyway if this is where we stand. So what have I got to lose?

crazy_cat_lady

Ah no. Sorry to read this post LCC. Sounds as though you have to have this out with him without arguing if possible. Calmly explain why you need him to chip in a bit more. Of course he can afford holidays and takeaway if he's paying way less than he should be. I'm angry for you... :mad:

lcc86

Thanks CCL, funnily enough I didn't need to bring it up again, I got a text from him the next morning saying he'd contribute more. That's probably as close to an apology as I'm likely to get!

Nothing much else to report really. I've cancelled my TV license as I never watch live tv. I've downloaded Netflix for a free trial, I might pay for that afterwards (£6 a month) instead of a tv license.

On a less MSE note, I dropped my phone in water the other day :mad: I checked my insurance and it ran out 10 days beforehand so I really screwed myself over there!! So I've had to buy a new one... £130 I didn't need to spend but a lesson learned, never bring phones into the bathroom!!! When will I learn! I did have the money upfront but decided to put it on my Very account because the money I had is allocated for something else. I'll pay it off interest free over the next three months.

lcc86

New phone has arrived yesterday, all set up now. Still annoyed with myself but what can I do! Lesson learned as I said.

This week has been quiet, it was my birthday on Monday so I didn't go to work and went horse riding instead then met my sister for lunch before walking a friend's dogs. Off to visit my parents this weekend and do a bit more riding. I am starting to feel a little guilty about spending money on this (£70 a month ish) along with £25 for the gym (which I do use) when I could put that towards my debt... But I don't wanna give it up! I don't really go out drinking etc so this is my only extravagance in life I might be able to do some free riding through my volunteer agency once I improve a little so that could help reduce costs in time! I really do enjoy it though, and the gym, and just getting out and about in general, I feel it improves my mental wellbeing and on a completely shallow level, I can see the difference in weight and my figure :eek:

Just paid my credit card for the month and am up to 38% of my total paid. I originally wanted to pay 40% by August but I can definitely get this done by June instead so I've amended it. 50% will be the next target after that!!

Verbatim

Well done. Keep your riding and gym. You're paying off the debt very well so why make yourself miserable?