The question

Zola.

Thinking of asking OH the question around summer time next year.

I have always picked her jewelry at Christmas and its always been a hit ....its only been necklaces, bracelets and earrings though, never a ring, so maybe this is going to be difficult.

I feel reasonably comfortable with picking something that she will like, I know she really likes platinum, so that would be the ring type as a starter. She has a small hand and thin fingers..and I don't think she wears rings all that much... Would it be foolish to buy one without letting her pick? She does have rings in the wardrobe that I could use as a guide, but maybe these rings wouldn't be the best indicator?

I have an idea in mind on what I want to do re proposal... if I do it local, or else I may save it for when we go on holiday.

Also, I am based in Northern Ireland, are there any independent jewelers that any of you could recommend?

lulu_92

Zola. wrote: »

Thinking of asking OH the question around summer time next year.

I have always picked her jewelry at Christmas and its always been a hit ....its only been necklaces, bracelets and earrings though, never a ring, so maybe this is going to be difficult.

I feel reasonably comfortable with picking something that she will like, I know she really likes platinum, so that would be the ring type as a starter. She has a small hand and thin fingers..and I don't think she wears rings all that much... Would it be foolish to buy one without letting her pick? She does have rings in the wardrobe that I could use as a guide, but maybe these rings wouldn't be the best indicator?

I have an idea in mind on what I want to do re proposal... if I do it local, or else I may save it for when we go on holiday.

Also, I am based in Northern Ireland, are there any independent jewelers that any of you could recommend?

I'm not picking my engagement ring out, but my sister picked hers. I kind of think that the ring should be something you want to see her wear, that it made you think of her when you saw it.

The N. Ireland board is great for your jeweller needs

Good luck!

Flossie.

Awwwww, how sweet.

Do you know someone very close to her, who you can trust to not tell her, who could 'fish' for information, and 'borrow' one of her rings, so you can get an idea of the size? Although the ring can be resized of course.

Good luck. I hope you will both be very happy.

roobee13

Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!! Love an engagement thread

How would you feel if you picked something and she really didn't like it? If it's devastated, then go together, if not, then have a go yourself.

You could always ask with a cheap ring (or haribo, it has been done) and then explain you'd like to choose her proper one together?

Good luck

ETA - if you do pick yourself, her small hands and fingers might not suit a giant rock, just a thought!

Buzzybee90

I personally think it's better if you choose it. Sounds like you've picked her out nice jewellery before, so I'm sure you can do it again! You can't go far wrong with a traditional engagement ring unless she's not into that sort of thing.

InsideInsurance

Unfortunately opinions are very split on this.

You get some women who definitely want to pick their own given that in theory they are going to be wearing this every day for life. Others, like my now wife, hate the idea of having to pick their own and "expect" the guy to propose with the ring (even if its a £25 thing from Argos).

Personally, I did decide to buy the ring as my image of how it "should be done" was with ring in hand. The idea of going shopping with the Mrs afterwards was certainly appealing to remove the pressure but didnt work in my head.

One thing to point out, whatever metal you chose for the engagement ring you should also use for the wedding band as the two will rub against each other and if they arent the same then you'll get uneven wear due to the different strengths.

Personally not a fan of white gold as its not white and the shiny nice white you see is rhodium plating which will wear off overtime meaning either you end up with a yellowish ring. You can replate them, its not very expensive, but it does mean you are without your rings every few years.

I'd also avoid the high street retailers like the plague as they are horrendously over priced. I know I cross checked someone's £7,500 ring from a well known company and you could buy the identical thing from Blue Nile for under £3,500 and the diamond certification came from GIA who are stricter than EGL that the high street had used.

Zola.

Thanks, good advice

Do some jewelers likes bluenile stock the exact same ring as high street stores?

I was always thought jewelers made their own bespoke jewelry.

shegirl

Most high street jewellers sell mass produced rings that are available in many places,some will be unique.

If you want bespoke/unique commission one or seek out a good independant that does their own,a jeweller that has a repair and design service inhouse (rather than the send it away for you/replace brigade) and bench jewellers in is likely to be largely doing their own designs.


As for the ring,choose it yourself.That's part of the romance for me,I hate the idea of choosing a ring and think it somewhat spoils it.

Engage the help of one of her friends if needed,that will help with sizing and design.

roobee13

I believe the styles etc are the same but the quality of the diamond is better.

My BFFs now fiance bought her ring from Bluenile and said they were fab

bugslet

roobee13 wrote: »

You could always ask with a cheap ring (or haribo, it has been done) and then explain you'd like to choose her proper one together?

Good luck

!

I really like that idea, it's fun!

shegirl wrote: »

As for the ring,choose it yourself.That's part of the romance for me,I hate the idea of choosing a ring and think it somewhat spoils it.

Engage the help of one of her friends if needed,that will help with sizing and design.

You see, I'm completely the opposite. I don't wear many rings as Zola's intended seems not to. Mr Bugs, bless him, had given me some lovely jewellery over the years, but his choice in rings was not mine, not for something that you are going to wear every day of your life.

It's tricky Zola, you know her best, but I'm with roobee, haribo followed by a shopping trip together.

InsideInsurance

bugslet wrote: »

I really like that idea, it's fun!

And this is the challenge as the Mrs hated that idea. Go shopping for other rings sure but not the E ring.

She did say if it had been a hulahoop then that would have been fine but she'd only ever have worn the hulahoop and wouldnt have wanted a replacement for it as its the ring that was there at the time of the question.

In the USA it seems they are almost the exact opposite with many people getting their rings "upgraded" as their financial status improves. I was talking to a woman at a do at the weekend and she had a 5ct rock on her finger and a diamond necklace with about 4-5 graduated stones and she was saying that her hubby bought her a bigger stone every few years and each time she had the stone replaced in her ring and the old stone being added to her necklace.

Zola. wrote: »

Do some jewelers likes bluenile stock the exact same ring as high street stores?

I was always thought jewelers made their own bespoke jewelry.

There is a mixture. If you are looking at a standard solitaire, solitaire plus a couple of side stones etc there is no point in the cost of getting your own cast when you can buy the settings wholesale and just stamp your mark into it and put your stones in them

You then supplement the stock rings with a few of your own designs to create your differentiation.