Does the opposite of what I ask

thorsoak

In future - just say NO to whatever she asks you to do! Broken record time!

busiscoming2

Next time she asks or talks as though she is edging for a lift just say no.
You also have to ask yourself if the friendship is worth keeping going.

cheepskate_2

Possibility, that she sees the friendship as ended and not the same way you do, but you are obviously a use to her, so she cannot drop you

Also why do you go looking for her, she is not your child...just tell her at the start if she is not back by such and such then you have to go.. AND GO.

Does she do this with other friends or just you

Billie-S

I doubt if she is doing it to be malicious, more like she is completely oblivious. But there is no reason for you to keep tolerating this.

If you say 3, and she isn't there, then just leave. You need to fight fire with fire imo, and start treating her as she treats you.

I have found that when I do that with people, they either buckle down and stop the behaviour as they don't like it done to them OR they leave the friendship: no loss as they were a bit useless as a friend anyway.

jumpingjackd

I would give her maybe five minutes grace, especially if you are going to be late to pick up your kids. What is more important here, a selfish friend or children standing waiting for you.

marisco_2

Riversong wrote: »

Well I did tell her the impact at the time but she was very unconcerned and was the same every other time. I mean ten minutes fine but a half hour and no apology?

One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say ~ Bryant H. McGill

If this woman cant even grant you that courtesy, then I question what makes you wish to continue to have a friendship with her.

Pollycat

I don't think she's doing the opposite of what you say either.

Some people just have no sense of time and quite often that comes with a blatant disregard for other people.

If you intend doing her a favour again, be very clear that when you say 'I'm leaving at x o'clock', that is exactly what time you'll be leaving - with her or without her.

She 'laughs it off' because you've allowed her to control what you do.

dandelionclock30

Shes not interested in you and has no respect for you.Being held up can happen to anyone but not all the time.
I'd let he do her own errands and not be giving her lifts anywhere. If you do meet her somewhere say to her that you will meet at x and if shes late you will leave without her.
Also I would be looking at meeting other people and not bothering with her as shes not really a friend.

BJV

I hate to say it but it sounds as though you have already spoken to her and still she either can not be bothered or has no respect for you, your feelings and your commitments.


I think that it sounds like you would be better off without her and instead find a friend who listens, makes you laugh and respects you for being you.


Sorry but I have some very close friends not many but just a few and like it or lump it they know if I had to go pick up my children I would not wait a second. She obviously does not value your friendship.


Again sorry to presume but you sound like a caring person, you do not need this person as a friend.

pollypenny

You had your phone. Ringing her and telling her you were ready to leave, and would do so in five minutes,,might have done the trick.