DH not being so dearest!

esmerelda98

Steroids can contribute to paranoia, and a higher sex drive as well.

FBaby

Higher sex drive once a week? You clearly both have issues with faithfulness it is bound to affect your trust for each other and in any car sounds like it goes deeper then just sex anyway.

rach_k

He doesn't sound like a very nice man to me.

It's quite the stereotype that women want sex less frequently than men and I very much doubt every man in that situation would think the woman was having an affair. He's just plain wrong there.

Perhaps part of the problem is one I think a lot of couples have to some degree. The man sees sex as a way to make things ok/show love/build the relationship and everything else will fall into place but for the woman, the sex is what you do when everything else is right first. I can see how he might be frustrated by this but it is him who needs to change... nobody should be made to feel like they have to have sex!

gwynlas

Well you had evidence before you married that he could cheat as that is how you started and the saying goes if you marry your mistress you are creating a vacancy. Doormen get offers all the time particularly if they look the part.
What would it take for you to want to sleep with him on his nights off? Him wining and dining you? A date night? Someone minding the kids? Steroid rage is real as is shrinkage if he overdoes them. The love muscle does not respond the same as others.
Let him know the arguing and accusing you does not help. Do not cancel meetings because he is being silly. You are years younger than him and might need to rely on your business for income if the worst was to happen. He is probably scared that you are a young self employed business woman who might be a catch for others.
If this continues seek marriage guidance.

hgotsparkle

I agree you need to get out.Even though we're young (mid 20s) we have an unspoken agreement that if we know one is tired, the other doesn't try to initiate. If we feel like its been a while, we speak about it but we never get upset about that, thats because we respect each other. He doesn't respect you.

lulu_92

hgotsparkle wrote: »

I agree you need to get out.Even though we're young (mid 20s) we have an unspoken agreement that if we know one is tired, the other doesn't try to initiate. If we feel like its been a while, we speak about it but we never get upset about that, thats because we respect each other. He doesn't respect you.

We have a similar thing too. Strangely it's always me initiating and him saying no. He's more of an "early riser" :rotfl:

hgotsparkle

lulu_92 wrote: »

We have a similar thing too. Strangely it's always me initiating and him saying no. He's more of an "early riser" :rotfl:

I know what you mean!
I'm sure I read somewhere that men are "programmed" to go in the morning, yet women peak at night....

Errata

Dear me, marriage to a 58 year old junkie sounds like unbridled joy.

Gavin83

Is once a week really normal? I don't actually think I could be in a relationship that was any less than 4 times a week.

I consider sex drive in a similar category to children or marriage, its something you need to agree on or the relationship just won't work. If your sex drives are that different maybe your just not compatible?

lulu_92

hgotsparkle wrote: »

I know what you mean!
I'm sure I read somewhere that men are "programmed" to go in the morning, yet women peak at night....

That definitely sounds right!