Who's at fault - student or lecturer?

studentphil

melancholly wrote: »

and as you were told on here over and over again, it is not the responsibility of a lecturer for any given module to provide that support. you needed to speak to your disability support or student services or the university counselling service.

lecturers are not trained to be responsible for students dealing with personal problems like that - they are not qualified to do it, and besides, there are while teams of people who are there to do just that.

any lecturer who sees a whole group of students for 2 hours or so a week simply cannot be held accountable for this kind of thing.

you chose not to go down the correct avenues that were available to you. don't make out that universities don't care about any students because you didn't do what about 50 people on here recommended that you did.

I went down all the routes of support and all I was told was it was not there job but someone elses. So I did follow all the correct routes but no one could help. Because my issues were in the grey area between disability and study support it was really not clear who was best meant to help.

bestpud

studentphil wrote: »

I went down all the routes of support and all I was told was it was not there job but someone elses. So I did follow all the correct routes but no one could help.

So you went to your uni counselling service saying you felt suicidal and they turned you away, saying it wasn't their job??? Come on, we're not that daft on here!!!

I don't want to be rude but if you were anything like you are on here then i'm not surprised lecturers, at least, did not respond well. Going along with queries about the subject matter and asking for reading advice, or a discussion about a particular topic is different to going along and saying you don't understand anything at all.

I don't recall reading, although it may be me, what exactly you did do or say to all these people who turned you away. It does sound like you just turned up whingeing about this, that and the next thing and had nothing specific you wanted to gain from the meetings.

I may be wrong but that's the way it seems from the posts I have read!

Btw, have you had any luck on the job front - last I remember you had an interview?

melancholly

bestpud wrote: »

So you went to your uni counselling service saying you felt suicidal and they turned you away, saying it wasn't their job??? Come on, we're not that daft on here!!!

so glad to see your comment - thought it was me going nuts (or i was about to go and find a wall to bang my head against!).

admittedly my uni counselling service had a waiting list (sad sign in itself!) but they were amazing for me.

studentphil

melancholly wrote: »

so glad to see your comment - thought it was me going nuts (or i was about to go and find a wall to bang my head against!).

admittedly my uni counselling service had a waiting list (sad sign in itself!) but they were amazing for me.

I never went and said I was going to top myself because I never got to that stage of unhappiness. But I did get to the point where I was so sick of life that I wanted to just go out and never come back, which is one step down from wanting to end it all.

bestpud

studentphil wrote: »

I never went and said I was going to top myself because I never got to that stage of unhappiness. But I did get to the point where I was so sick of life that I wanted to just go out and never come back, which is one step down from wanting to end it all.

I didn't for one moment think you did present yourself at their door, saying you were going to top yourself! But, did you go to the couselling service at all, and if you did, did they turn you away?

studentphil

bestpud wrote: »

So you went to your uni counselling service saying you felt suicidal and they turned you away, saying it wasn't their job??? Come on, we're not that daft on here!!!

I don't want to be rude but if you were anything like you are on here then i'm not surprised lecturers, at least, did not respond well. Going along with queries about the subject matter and asking for reading advice, or a discussion about a particular topic is different to going along and saying you don't understand anything at all.

I don't recall reading, although it may be me, what exactly you did do or say to all these people who turned you away. It does sound like you just turned up whingeing about this, that and the next thing and had nothing specific you wanted to gain from the meetings.

I may be wrong but that's the way it seems from the posts I have read!

Btw, have you had any luck on the job front - last I remember you had an interview?

I said to them like I was not coping with the course and I was very unhappy, which is a general I hated all and eveything I know. I got answers like, it is best to speak to someone about it and that someone else said it was not their job. So where does it leave you, other than more unhappy than you
were to start with?

Just call it was just the worst part of my life form me picking the wrong subject to and it really doesn't matter now anyway. I have not got a job yet, but I am looking at a masters now to see if I can learn from the errors of the last few years and to find some love for learning new things again.

bestpud

melancholly wrote: »

so glad to see your comment - thought it was me going nuts (or i was about to go and find a wall to bang my head against!).

admittedly my uni counselling service had a waiting list (sad sign in itself!) but they were amazing for me.

Well, if you are going nuts, then that makes two of us!!!

Yes, same for me with the counselling service although I didn't have to wait. Some periods of the year are more busy than others I guess.

studentphil

bestpud wrote: »

I didn't for one moment think you did present yourself at their door, saying you were going to top yourself! But, did you go to the couselling service at all, and if you did, did they turn you away?

No, I was never turned away from counseling and I got help with looking at myself as not being such a failure and to take it all in more context.

bestpud

studentphil wrote: »

I said to them like I was not coping with the course and I was very unhappy, which is a general I hated all and eveything I know. I got answers like, it is best to speak to someone about it and that someone else said it was not their job. So where does it leave you, other than more unhappy than you
were to start with?

Just call it was just the worst part of my life form me picking the wrong subject to and it really doesn't matter now anyway. I have not got a job yet, but I am looking at a masters now to see if I can learn from the errors of the last few years and to find some love for learning new things again.

Who did you go to and who were you sent on to? I'm not really clear who you spoke to iykwim? It sounds to me like a counsellor would have been (may still be) a good idea as you do not seem happy with yourself to me.

It doesn't really matter now, no, but I think it is something you definitely need to be clear on before you even think of embarking on an MA. Honestly, if you don't, you run the risk of following the same path again.

For one thing, I believe you have a disability but did not feel you received any support with it (sorry if I've got it wrong - I'm going on memory here)? That is one thing you would absolutely need to sort properly if you feel it would help your ability to study.

Also, if you haven't fully worked out where the lack of support issue stemmed from, then what are you going to do to prevent the same happening again?

I really think you need to think very hard about this - it's a lot of expense if you aren't going to enjoy it, or just do not have the required skills. THat's not meant as a criticism as I firmly believe everyone is excellent at something and there are more forms of intelligence than academic ability. It would be soul destroying to chase something that is just not right for you!

melancholly

studentphil wrote: »

I have not got a job yet, but I am looking at a masters now to see if I can learn from the errors of the last few years and to find some love for learning new things again.

glad to see that, true to form, you've completely ignored all the advice about doing this that people gave you........ you are not academic - there is nothing wrong with that, people aren't all good at exams and it doesn't mean that they are less intelligent or will succeed less in life. play to your strengths - further academic work is so clearly going down the route of one of your weaknesses - but still, you refuse to listen!

i can't understand how you expect to learn anything at uni - you disregard things that people say when you don't like them and plough right on ahead sure that you know best - obviously, your mark is due to uni letting you down, nothing to do with you.....

i think i'll revert to plan b, banging my head against the wall, as it will be more productive than trying to reason with you, phil!