savings woes :(

sara46

Hi there,
Im new to this forum and looking for some advice....Im a 30 year old teacher who has being working for the past 9 years, long story very short I have only saved 6,000....I am so embarrassed by this, I live at home and gave my parents 900 per month and paid for groceries and bills along the way so have had very little money left over for savings....my bf is a farmer and has told me he has alot of savings but doesn't pay rent etc at home,,,heres my worry, while he knows that I paid rent etc up until last april, I don't want him thinking im useless with money and its really worrying me...any advice much appreciated x

ViolaLass

Are you useless with money?

eskbanker

sara46 wrote: »

I don't want him thinking im useless with money and its really worrying me...any advice much appreciated x

You're not useless with money! There are many people on these forums who would be thrilled to have any savings, never mind £6K.... It doesn't seem realistic to me to compare the situation of someone paying £900 per month for 'rent'/keep (seems a lot, by the way) with someone who pays nothing, that's a £10,800 difference in outgoings for a start.

Far be it from me to offer relationship advice on a forum like this but honesty is usually the best policy - I can't see you have anything to be embarrassed about, but if he thinks less of you because he thinks you should have more money than you do, then I'd humbly suggest you both might need to consider your futures....

ajdj

I expect you'll get responses asking, commending or criticising you for giving your parents £900/month.

Perhaps give us a bit more info on how this figure has arisen?

My initial reaction is that it is a lot of money. However, you might have been helping your parents out (in which case, good for you!). Perhaps your parents have asked for a high contribution to stop you from spending it and have saved it for you?

Either way, you won't be able to look at saving money unless you draw up a budget. Look at what things you can cut down on and where you might find money that could be saved. £6,000 is a good start, look at adding regular small amounts. It soon adds up!

sara46

Thanks eskbanker for your advice, much appreciated. He knows from the off that I have always paid that to my folks, it is a lot but I feel they spent a fortune putting me through college so I don't mind too much, its just wrecking my head I guess that I should have saved more and I think its because I will prob end up moving into the family home which there is no mortgage on and id feel a bit useless with so little savings,but hoping to have a good bit saved in the coming year

sara46

ajdj thanks for your response. I just felt that it was the best thing to do considering they had 2 kids in college at the time and I appreciated everything they did for me, that has stopped since April so I am savings lights out since then. Its just worrying me in the context of my boyfriend but Im lucky to have a permanent job with income every two weeks which he knows, ah my head is just wrecked!

Voyager2002

I just don't see the problem...

Your savings will only reflect what is left after paying rent and bills, and your "rent" is far more than most single people would be paying. If you were unable to afford a car, house deposit, holiday or whatever then that would be a problem and I would advise you to look for somewhere cheaper to live. However, you sound happy living at home and happy to contribute to supporting your parents: that is a legitimate lifestyle choice. The only reason your partner has more savings than you is because he and his parents have made different arrangements, reflecting different choices. That is also fine if it suits them.

I was worried by one tiny detail in your post: you seem to be paying a lot to your parents in the expectation that one day you will own the family home outright. Do be aware that the value of the house might in the future be needed to finance long-term care, so you might end up with no money and just the knowledge that you supported your parents through this phase of their lives. If you would be happy with that, fine: if not, consider ways in which you could use your contribution to buy a share of ownership of the house.

sara46

thanks for the response Voyager, sorry I may have got the wires crossed, I meant that I would be moving into my boyfriends family home where there is no mortgage on it and Id hope I wouldn't feel bad moving there when I couldn't pay half the mortgage

ajdj

If I'm understanding correctly, the OP stopped paying the £900/month in April (or reduced her contribution). If the £6,000 has been saved between April and today then that is very good going! If you continue to save like that then you will have a very good amount of savings in no time.

Try not to think of it as a competition between you and your boyfriend. Your situations are different. Just concentrate on your own situation

sara46

thanks very much ajdj much appreciate the response I just hope he wouldn't break up with me over lack of savings....

greenface

What do you earn roughly ? Teachers pay can differ . do you earn any extra from anything else . could you ? what do you think you "waste" your money on ? could that be cut ? I think your doing just fine BTW