Baby shower?

Person_one

lilmissreading wrote: »

Phew! I just wanted to mark the occasion but would be horrified if it turned into an expensive hoopla. It's about the time with friends. Need a name for it to differentiate from baby shower...

Why does it need a name? Do you normally give the evening a name when you get together with your friends?

MrsC....tobe

I organised a baby shower for my sister for her first, and then together we organised a surprise for another sister for her first. There was no baby shower when they were pregnant with their siblings. People brought their presents then and they didn't receive gifts after the birth from those people. Some people came empty handed and said that they would give the gift after the birth.
It's down to each individual what they want to do and the day/evening can be as simple as you want it to be.
We used it to gather friends and family, some travelling from a distance, that the mum to be hadn't seen for a while, and wasn't likely to see for a while after the birth and used it to have food, drinks, party games etc and everyone had a great day.

I know I won't be having one due to me living so for away from family and most friends which I'm quite happy about, similar to yet another sister who had a baby earlier this year and didn't have one....or if she did I wasn't invited! Lol.

janninew

BAGGY wrote: »

I think they are tacky.
It's almost like having two bites of the cherry - a baby shower gift and a gift when the baby arrives.
why dont you hold a coffee morning/ brunch instead where you and the girlies can have a natter and plan a date for after the birth when you can organise a night out?

Organising a girls night out after you've given birth is literally the last thing on your mind!! :rotfl: Don't think I had a night out until my daughter was around 16 months old due to tiredness, breastfeeding etc.

lilmissreading

Person_one wrote: »

Why does it need a name? Do you normally give the evening a name when you get together with your friends?

In my head giving an event a name means people know it's more special to me that they make it rather than a normal night where it matters less but I said that in detail anyway to the friends

wendz86

I also did a 'no gift' one . A couple of friends did bring gifts but didn't buy anything when she was born (of course didn't expect them to).

We did games and had food and was a nice time to catch up with all my girl friends before.

GlamGirlie

Person_one wrote: »

Personally I don't like them. I think it's really tasteless to invite people to a party where the whole point is that they give you presents.

They're an American thing, and the tradition here is that we wait till the little one has safely arrived and celebrate the birth then, it's much better. Your friends and family will probably love getting you and the baby gifts when he/she is here.

Congratulations, and sorry for your losses. X

Agree wholeheartedly with all of personone's points.

Good luck.

BAGGY

I made sure I had a night out. After carrying 6lb twins and going through an emergency c-sect I was going to make darn sure that I went out for a curry that I couldn't eat for the last 6 months due to acid indigestion.

jaylee3

BritAbroad wrote: »

I think they're really tacky. I have attended one and vowed never to go to another. I've been invited to several since but have always declined. They create an obligation on people to give multiple presents - one at the shower, one after the birth, and another at the baptism (if applicable).

Incidentally, it's my understanding that a baby shower is not organised by the mother-to-be. That seems right, given the main objective is to give gifts. Any friend who arranged their own baby shower would appear to be greedy to me, and I'd be distancing myself from them.

Agree ^^^

I hate how all this Americanised stuff keeps infesting British culture: first trick or treat, then Black Friday, Americanised sayings, Thanksgiving is making an appearance with some, we are swamped with their 'cuisine' (Mcdonalds, pizza hut, starbucks etc) and their fashion labels and their rock stars and movie stars and their tv programmes! And now these ghastly baby showers. My sister's son even had his school celebrating Independence day FGS. Why this has to be celebrated in the UK is beyond me. I have NOTHING against America or the Americans BTW, but why do we need all of their stuff over here in the UK!???

And I agree with the above poster that there is an expectation to give presents for the baby at a 'baby shower.' That's fine as long as they don't expect anything when it's born. But many will.

And Emylou (the OP,) your baby must be nearly here now yes? If you were 6 months pregnant in September?

Is baby nearly here?

Kynthia

I think most people who have a baby shower don't expect gifts at both the shower and the birth, and really would just like a nice girly afternoon that focuses on the excitement of the upcoming new baby before the chaos begins. After the birth you are tired, overwhelmed, perhaps can't or won't leave the baby for the afternoon, won't be able to catch up properly with friends the same way if you have the baby with you, etc.

Uniscots97

I organised my own but I had good reason as certain people within my family would have taken over and having been to 3 others arranged by them where they dictated who was/wasn't invited (one of the mothers to be didn't get to invite her Mum, sister or her friends), what games would be played, food and the fact they thought it was an excuse to get drunk. I held mine in a local restaurant (as if I'd let them organise it it would have been too far away for my elderly relatives to travel to), with my Mum, Gran and a couple of friends. Each of us paying for our own meal. We played one game, guess the size of mummy's tummy and I got everyone to fill out prediction cards I'd made. I said if people wanted to bring gifts they could but only something small (£5-£10) or handmade in return everyone got little favours I'd made. I got lots of beautiful hand knitted things and had a lovely time. Had I let the other relatives plan it I wouldn't have been allowed to invite who I wanted they would have invited all their friends etc and they would have picked all the party food and booze then presented me with the bill (I'm not kidding) and insisted it be held in my home or one of theirs and expected me to clear it up. They were quite miffed I organised my own and yes I invited them but they said no. But in the end I got the day I wanted not what someone else wanted.