The things they say!

sparrer

My daughter was asked to do some chores which included emptying the refuse. She didn't want to help, threw in a paddy burst into tears. When a neighbour saw her going to the dustbin she asked what was wrong, and DD, with a tear-stained face and holding a carrier bag sobbed 'I've got to go to the refuge and I don't want to!' Goodness only knew what the neighbour thought about me driving a six-year old out to a refuge!

Mr_Toad

Some years ago I was landscaping the garden, it had a slope so I had a couple of wall built to make two level terraces.

I'd arranged for 80 tons of topsoil to be delivered via Dad, he had his own civil engineering and building company.

Two lorries arrived one Saturday morning and tipped the soil onto the drive. Shortly afterwards my parents arrived and we were all standing on the drive.

My daughter, who was four at the time, was standing with me and Dad and the OH was talking to Mum.

After a moments reflection my daughter said

"Well Popa that lot will be a !!!!!! to shift" Dad didn't react other than to say absently "Hmm, I was just thinking the same angel." she then went on "Do you think we could get the bobcat, a small digger, down the side of the house?" "I don't know, nip and get the tape measure and we'll see."

In contrast my Mum's reaction was somewhat different!

When she'd recovered the power of speech she let Dad have both barrels.

My daughter loved nothing more than going to work with 'Popa' so spent quite some time on various building sites. By the time she was 8 she could operate a JCB like a pro and drive the big Catapiller, Dad said she was the best site forman he'd aver had.

The downside of all this was that she would occasionally use some colourful language. :eek:

Thanfully Mum never knew the half of it.

kingfisherblue

Thanks to everyone who has wished us luck with the funding bid. It isn't in the form of cash, it's work being done to make the garden suitable for my son's needs - which makes it easier in a way for me, as I don't have to employ someone, sort payment, send in receipts, etc.


Today we were in the garden centre and I showed my son some garden decorations. They are a spiral with crystal type balls in, and when you spin them, the balls look as though they are moving up or down (depending on which way you spin them). He went silent for a moment, and then just said 'Awesome!' in a dreamy sort of voice. One elderly chap who was walking past was quite taken with my son's reaction. It was quite good to see, something as simple as a few twists of metal and a glass ball, having such an effect on my son.


OP, so sorry to hijack your thread. I do hope that people keep posting their funny stories - it's great to have a thread that cheers you up as much as this one does! My favourite story so far is the one about the vicar baptising a baby. I really did laugh out loud!

Indie_Kid

That's lovely. I hope you and your son get the funding.

I have a vague memory of being a child and having a female dog. (I've always grown up with dogs, mostly male) I noticed that on the dog's tummy was her nipples and said something like "this means she's pregnant". Mum then had to explain it doesn't quite work like that!

I used to have to do a work placement at a nursery as part of my NVQ. The nursery was from 3 months to 5 years. I was in the toddlers section and one boy asked a nursery worker if she was clean! She responded with "Yes I am. I had a shower this morning".

russetred

My DD then 3 years old told her dad "to shut that door there's a giraffe (draft) getting in"

lfg

We've been keeping a note of some of the things our daughter has said and done, now aged 10.

Aged 3 she was in her bedroom. I came in to find her on the bed with two toys, most of the others were on the floor, and her favourite monkey up on the shelves opposite. Asked what she was doing she said performing Sleeping Beauty, the toys were the audience. When asked why monkey was there, she replied "He's doing the lights"!:T

Our cat needed to have some teeth out, "Does he get money?" she asked!

missprice

Back in the mists of time when my son was about 3, he had a ride on toy tractor.
After trying to run over his little sis with it I warned him that if he did not stop I would put the tractor in the bin.

Cue my son looking at the bin ( small round metal one) and then looking at the tractor, he turns to me and says
Mummy the tractor won't fit in the bin.

Creased me up.:D

And my niece and her mum one day were arranging a spanish exchange trip. Me and the mum were talking about having the Spanish kid here and what to show them. Niece piped up with, whats a Spanish kidere.

Lots of scratching heads til we got it.

John_Gray

The ~3-year-old daughter of a friend of mine was taken for her first trip to the seaside. As soon as she got onto the beach and saw the sea her eyes widened and she said, "Ooh, Mummy, BIG bath!"

Later, at home, she was heard playing with some soft toys by herself and talking to them. Her mother caught the words, "And the Rabbit said to the Tiger, "I don't like your attitude..." " !

kat360

My 3 year old telling her nan that her brother was "definatly a boy coz he's got a little willie!"

She also asked me "Mommy, how do you know if your dead?" I said "i don't know" She then whispered to me "We could all be dead right now and we would never even know it!" Then she laughed and said " just joking silly!"

She also sat up in the middle of the night and told me that " Spiders have lots of eyes so they can see EVERYWHERE! " then lay back down and went back to sleep.

Denando

kingfisherblue wrote: »

My older son has Down's Syndrome and when something is going to happen shortly, he always says it is 'nearly soon'.

Oh, I LOVE 'nearly soon'. I'm going to start using that!