How to motivate a DIY/Housework allergic husband?

gingerdad

i'd go for the skip and stuff him, really if he can't be arsed to sort himself out its a shame.

he just needs to sort his life out really and get his priorities right.

it's only fair house work and other jobs are shared.

Stevie_Palimo

usignuolo wrote: »

Maybe I should be posting this on the families forum but I thought I would start here as more likely to find more readers able to office advice here.


My OH hates, and has always hated, DIY jobs and housework. (How I envy those of you whose partners are useful around the house.) Indeed he has a positive allergy to doing anything around the home, a combination of lack of ability (he is naturally clumsy and not at all dextrous) and a positive aversion to doing any domestic or diy chore.


When it comes to DIY he is ready to work overtime to pay someone else to do it and he can with an effort be cajoled into a little housework and gardening. Recently however we have hit an impass.


We live in a three bedroomed house. We have our bedroom, spare room and a third small bedroom which he uses as a home office. Our family is grown up and our son lives abroad with his family. While overseas he and his wife have produced two grandchildren. They are coming to stay for a holiday in the autumn and may want to camp out with us for a while in the new year, as they might be returning to the uk for good, while they look for somewhere to live.


The spare room is not large enough for2 adults and 2 children and OH and I have agreed we need to install bunk beds in the room used as his office for the children. For that to happen he needs to clear out some of his stuff which is all over the place.


He agrees this needs to happen but somehow there is never a right time to do it. I have offered to help and cleared a space in the cellar to store the overflow, but things have ground to a halt and he has taken to playing bridge several times a week, as a diversionary tactic.


I can hear some of you saying throw all his stuff in black plastic bags and let him sort it out. He is not the sort of man motivated by that approach and it would screw up his business files. It would not encourage him to get on with it. He needs to be offered some kind of incentive to make the drudgery of this (and other household related tasks), sufficiently rewarding to want to get on with it. Then I can order the bunk beds and a handyman to install them.


Anyone got any ideas how to motivate the old codger and indeed to do more DIY and housework generally. (Short of blowing up the bridge club...)

I think the best to motivate him here will be to put on your sexiest underwear / Maids out fit and then get him all worked up but state no fun until the job is done, Room cleaned and you are both left smiling afterwards.

Gordon_Hose

I assume you've been together/married for some time?

If so, has he developed this lethargy all of a sudden or has he never been one to turn his hand at DIY/Housework?

carefullycautious

How old are the children? If youngsters could you buy blow up single mattresses and let them camp out in your lounge. You can always hide the mattresses behind the sofa.

I'm sure the children will be so glad to see you they won't mind where they sleep.

If you have a large garden you can get some lovely summer houses as an alternative :rotfl: bit pricey though

I would not make him move his office stuff, I can sympathise with you as my hubby is the same, hence plain painted walls and same design we have had for years, I hate the whole disruption of any type of DIY and must be the only person around who had the same kitchen for over 30 years only getting a different one as we moved :rotfl:

carefullycautious

Stevie_Palimo wrote: »

I think the best to motivate him here will be to put on your sexiest underwear / Maids out fit and then get him all worked up but state no fun until the job is done, Room cleaned and you are both left smiling afterwards.

Never worked for me :rotfl:

trailingspouse

Clearing part of a room has nothing to do with DIY. And although you'd be perfectly capable of doing it, it's his stuff and he needs to do it if only so he knows where it all is next time he needs it.

Buy the bunk beds, get a delivery date - maybe a deadline will help with the motivation.

bridgedino

Basic treat and reward scheme. Find what will motivate him then simply exploit it

Nothing new in that method but tried and tested for century's

the_matrix

As a "gift" pay for him to go on a basic DIY course at the local college. He may like the experience, make a few new friends (rivals to bridge) and you'll never have to speak about it again.

Mojisola

the_matrix wrote: »

As a "gift" pay for him to go on a basic DIY course at the local college. He may like the experience, make a few new friends (rivals to bridge) and you'll never have to speak about it again.

But don't be surprised if you get a "housework" course as a Christmas gift!

smifffy1989

bridgedino wrote: »

Basic treat and reward scheme. Find what will motivate him then simply exploit it

Nothing new in that method but tried and tested for century's

special together time?

or new bridge cards