New job working full time! How do I fit everything in?

Kimmy1980

this is a really good thread thanks everyone i shall certainly be taking some advice myself. I am a mum of 4 boys (1, 3, 6 and 13) i currently work pt and tt (off for summer) when i return (same company diff office) i will be non tt and ft on shifts!! Never thought id be able to be ft whilst some.if the boys are so young but the shifts work well with all the days off during the week (10-12 hour shifts and some wknds) that i seem to be able to cover most school.hols without needing much extra childcare. IM feeling the guilt already without even starting as i do everything at home now and want to carry on.doing si. Tho realistically know that's nit possible. I will be planning meals each week and sirting out as much as i can in.advance. Thanks fir all the tips here xx

lindsaygalaxy

I think i'm going to try start doing the first level on the fly lady thread once i've finished my summer clear out. The summer hols seem to be flying past and my 'to do' list doesn't seem to be getting any shorter lol.

onlyroz

We both work full time. It took a while but we now just about have an equitable split with the cooking (although I think I still do more than my fair share of the housework).

My advice is to not let yourself fall into the trap of being expected to do all the housework and cooking. Approach it right from the start with the viewpoint that you're both working full time and so the jobs have to be split. Our arrangement is that I cook Mon-Wed, hubby cooks Thur-Fri and we share at the weekend. It also helps enormously to meal plan (which helps keep the shopping bill down) and to batch-cook at the weekend. And things like making packed lunches for the next day can be done while you're prepping the evening meal.

And if the kids are old enough get them to help out around the house as well - my son is 9 and I've started teaching him how to use a mop and sweeping brush in exchange for pocket money. He can also hang up washing and soon I might teach him how to sponge down the bathroom.

And in general I think people do far too much housework. Unless you have pets a run around with the hoover once a week should be plenty. The kitchen and bathroom can be wiped down as you go with a thourough clean done maybe monthly. For us it's the gardening that takes the time, but that's usually the fun part of the household "chores".

pinkshoes

I worked full time in term time this year.

I plan meals (list on fridge saying what we're eating on which day). I then compile a shopping list based on those meals, with the meals towards the end of the week being freezer or jar based so they don't go off.

Cleaning - I do the bathroom on a Saturday morning whilst having a shower, and DH looks after DS. DH washes up (otherwise I won't cook). The rest gets done when I have time, usually when DH is around and he feels guilty so helps!

I then have a great big "to do" list so I don't forget things!

lulu_92

Seanymph wrote: »

curry - awesome (I have the BEST recipe for beef curry)

May I partake?

TBagpuss

Congrats on the new job!

As others have said, I think the key issues are
(i) Agree a fair split of the chores - this may mean one of you doing more on one day and less on others, or one of you doing more of one type of job and less of another, but aim for an equal division over all.
(ii) Compromise. You may not (even between you) be able to do everything to the same standard as you did when you had more time on your hands. Decide (and agree with your husband) which things are most important, and which you are both willing to compromise on, whether that is not ironing anything other than work shirts, chosing to buy packaged products sometimes rather than cooking from scratch every day, vacuuming once a week instead of only ea day or whatever it may be.
(iii) be flexible - even once you've agreed with your spouse who will do what and which things may involve a compromise, it will take a little while to get used to a new routine, so be prepared to make changes as things go along - you may find that jobs you and he had thought of as needign roughly the same amount of work don.t , so you need to revist what is a fiar split, or one of you may find you love or hate a particulary job and need to reconsider how much of it you each do.
(iv) include everyone. Your children should be helping out - it's good for them and avoids them becoming lazy or entitled, and it is useful for them to learn to pull their weight and to be able to look after a house, as they will need to when they leave home. I'm not sure how old they are but even quite little children can learn that they have to put their toys away when they finish playing with them, can help lay and clear the table, put their own dirty clothes into the laundry basket etc. once they are 11 or so then there is no reason why they can't make their own packed lunches, do their own ironing and sort and put away their own laundry, and be doing their share of the washing up.
(v) lists! (and planning generally) lists are useful as they help everyone to keep track of what needs to be done or has been done. Having a running shopping list and getting everyone into the habit of writing on it when they open the last package of something, or use the last (or last but one) of anything saves time when you are shopping, and also shares the responsibility. Planning ahead so you know what meals you will be having through the week also helps - it means that if one of you get home earlier than expected, or before the other, of you have a plan then whoever is home first can make a start on cooking supper - plus if you plan meals ion advance you are less likely to have to make last minute supermarket runs because you are missing an ingredient or a meal. ordering online and getting your shopping delivered also saves a lot of time, and if you combine it with lists and planning can be more economical, too.

Finally, and most importantly, don't feel guilty if you can't do it all.

Seanymph

http://davidbrice.com/index.php/beef-curry-recipe-this-is-the-best/

you are welcome