Downsizing

ukcarper

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I've always been single, but can understand why one half of a couple would find it difficult to "get on with life" when on their own. I think many married couples don't really understand just how many mental adjustments single people have had to make to living a life without a partner and we sometimes forget ourselves (ie because we have done so over a period of many years). So, I can understand being put in that situation more or less suddenly would be a struggle.

Having said that, I would certainly agree that there are many interests/hobbies where it would be more than a little distracting to have a partner "peering over your shoulder" and I always knew I would have needed a room I could read quietly in if any OH I got was into watching tv or listening to music, so that we could both "do our respective thing" without disturbing the other. I would have hated to feel I had no option but to watch tv (when I hadn't planned on seeing a particular programme and possibly hated the one that was on) because there was only one "leisure room" and hubbie had switched on the tv in it. I spent quite a few years of my childhood being unable to concentrate on anything because one of my parents always wanted the tv on regardless and the sitting room was the only room in the house that was either heated or had comfortable seating, so the thought of a husband doing that to me as well would bring me out in an instant rash...:rotfl:.

Do you really need an extra room to read in what's wrong with bedroom.

whitesatin

We have only been in our house for less than 3 years but it is well located for everything we could need and for the greenline bus into London whenever we feel the need. It is not a huge house but it is a family house, with a big garden. We often have the grandchildren here to play and all is fine for the moment. I think we will have to face facts in ten years or so and go for something that has a smaller garden, at least.

The trouble is, you do get used to having space around you and, being detached, not having to consider the neighbours too much when indoors. It is not easy to find smaller, detached houses but I think that is what we will have to do when the time comes. I am in my early 60s and my husband 7 years younger so, health permitting, we should be ok for ten or so years. I often wonder if our outlook will change in the next ten years, e.g. will be care about being able to play music into the early hours if we choose to, will having neighbours through the wall be seen as an annoyance or an asset.

p00hsticks

ukcarper wrote: »

Do you really need an extra room to read in what's wrong with bedroom.

Fine if you're happy reading in bed (although that would be a bit odd in the middle of the day ?) , but I like to read sitting up in a nice big comfy armchair, with a good floor light behind and a side table for my cup of tea and biscuits - I'm sure I'm not the only one.

Unfortunately, despite what the TV bedroom furniture ads would have you believe, most bedrooms these days seem to be only large enough to fit a double bed, a wardrobe and a dressing table if you're lucky

ukcarper

p00hsticks wrote: »

Fine if you're happy reading in bed (although that would be a bit odd in the middle of the day ?) , but I like to read sitting up in a nice big comfy armchair, with a good floor light behind and a side table for my cup of tea and biscuits - I'm sure I'm not the only one.

Unfortunately, despite what the TV bedroom furniture ads would have you believe, most bedrooms these days seem to be only large enough to fit a double bed, a wardrobe and a dressing table if you're lucky

I can see the need for a spare room of sorts but I can't see why you need a room for each of you and lounge.

I see a lot of people wanting to downsize but then want what they already have I would have though downsizing would involve sacrificing something that's why I haven't .

ukcarper

whitesatin wrote: »

The trouble is, you do get used to having space around you and, being detached, not having to consider the neighbours too much when indoors. It is not easy to find smaller, detached houses but I think that is what we will have to do when the time comes.

That is the main thing stopping me downsizing a nice detached 2 bed bungalow is as much if not more than my 4 bed detached.

pollypenny

On the subject of storage, where do people put shelves, cupboards etc when they take walls down, for the fashionable open look?

missbiggles1

pollypenny wrote: »

On the subject of storage, where do people put shelves, cupboards etc when they take walls down, for the fashionable open look?

Maybe those of us of mature years are more interested in practicality than fashion?

(Mind you, we have a cellar.)

moneyistooshorttomention

ukcarper wrote: »

Do you really need an extra room to read in what's wrong with bedroom.

I don't have a room just to read in (that would be "extravagant"). I assume you are referring to my study here?

My study is where I have my desk (quite a hefty size one) and keep most of my books and all my paperwork. There wouldn't be room anywhere else in the house for that stuff and its best to keep one room dedicated to all that anyway, so that I'm not constantly distracted whilst trying to relax in sitting room or sleep in bedroom.

Lots of people have studies these days or, possibly, home offices. I don't work from home and do regard studies in a different light to home offices anyway, so study it is.

[Deleted User]

iris wrote: »

You don't have to be frail to need a hip replacement;)

My husband had both hips replaced then we moved and both of us did a terrific amount of work on the garden of this house ie moving 5 tonne of gravel etc. He cycles 60 miles at a time. Having a hip replaced gives a new lease of life and is not a signal of increasing frailty, stairs and isolation in a small village don`t stop him at all but we have an all important bus

I like that bungalow op, location where you feel comfortable and safe are paramount. Over time there are things you can do to it to make it more space efficient. One thing we have just done is have a local neighbour build us a `shed` it is 8m x 3m and fully insulated and vented. This is one step away from a workshop/workroom/hobbies room. It cost us £5000

My husband and I each have our own space but they double up as spare rooms when grandchildren come, we have great inflatable beds for visitors. It is important to each have your own space, even if in a shed or garage

Good luck with the search

moneyistooshorttomention

Further thoughts on UkCarper's "why a separate room to read in?" and I'm now wondering if he means "why would a married person require a 2nd room to read in if their spouse is watching tv in the sitting room?".

I remember JUST how successful (not!) my attempts at reading in my bedroom were as a child, when I was trying to get away from that "parental tv on all the time syndrome". Try for:
- no comfortable seating in bedroom
- no heat in bedroom
- no table etc to hand for things
- unsuitable lighting
- generally being a less comfortable/suitable room for leisure purposes than a sitting room

and all the same criteria will apply to most couples' bedrooms and that would mean the one trying to read there would "draw the short straw" and I could soon see resentment arising about "They get to do their thing (ie watching tv) in a comfortable room, but I have to do my thing (ie reading) in an uncomfortable room".