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Life begins again at 45
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I decided to cancel my commitments today, in case I had to drop everything to get Dad home.
After speaking to him, where he appeared to be recovering and the plan was to come back here later in the week.
I put my head down to sort the rest of Christian Aid week - why does admin seem to take all day?
Lovely OH made cod hash and he returned home from dropping buckets back with a bottle of wine as we were working so hard. Work stopped play then
As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
I was up and just about to dry my hair in readiness to go into school to do the school assembly. When my Dad's friend rung at the end of her tether...
So OH dropped everything and drove to Suffolk ( from Surrey). Then I had an interesting (not) couple of hours debating how to get my Father home
Friend was saying laying flat in a private ambulance :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:
GP was saying dosed up on analgesia should be ok to come home in the car.....
On phone to friend apparently he had been hell to live with since being discharged from A & E. I was soooooo
:o:o:o:o:o:o:o:o. A real drama Queen, ignoring all medical advice given and being very horrible, so infact making the situation worse. Not to mention not eating so his diabetic levels!!!
Once OH got there and assessed situation we decided to go wth the car option, and I set off for Dad's to arrange for bed to be moved downstairs into the dining room. Fortunately cousins who decorated still there, so could help, I made tea, and spoke to numerous people trying to put things in place.
OH decided to drive home that night so that meant staying at Dad's longer. I went out to get my cousins Pizza as a Thank you as i couldn't have sorted the downstairs bed without them.
So when Dad arrived, I expected my cousin to need to nearly carry him in, Oh no, he walked in, a bit unsteady, but actually really well, and instead of going straight to bed he inspected the painting. All the while moaning and groaning in a theatrical way.
I must admit, I was shattered so when all I could hear was praise and kind words to everyone else and when I went near terse words, or a poor poor me look. I was internally getting more and more :mad::mad:.
Swiftly departed leaving my car there and went home with OH. It was nearly 10 O'clock.As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Sorry to hear your dad has been in the wars
On a lighter note, some people will do anything to be manhandled by burly builders!
I get knocked down but I get up again (Chumbawamba, Tubthumping)0 -
Sun_Addict wrote: »
On a lighter note, some people will do anything to be manhandled by burly builders!
:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
I awoke feeling shattered and knowing I had a difficult day a head.
OH made me a bacon butty, and coffee fortified me for firstly ringing Dad's friend to see how she was
We had a full and frank discussion:o:o:o. She is so :mad::mad::mad: with him. She is a very compassionate person, and has much sympathy and understanding for what he has done. However it became even more apparent that he had not helped himself, and in her words treated her like a "skivey" :eek::eek::o:o:o
She indicated that she was going to draw away from the relationship/friendship, which I know will hit him hard.
Arrived just before a GP home visit. I have to say, was impressed as they have been very helpful since I rung yesterday. Compassionate, friendly but firm.
Told me to ring social services, which I did, and i have to say was so impressed an occupational therapist came out later that afternoon, she works a 12 hour shift, 8 tip 8 which she says makes such a difference, traditionally OT's worked 8 - 4 or 9 - 5. Again compassionate, friendly, helpful, with aids but very firm about what he should be doing about moving. Lying in bed not helpful we got the line of, "I thought if I rested in bed, the pain would ease" Despite all the medical professionals his friend and me saying he needed to mobilise. !. At one point he had four people running around to his command.
I am afraid, I got tough with him, as I had decided that he wasn't going to bully me into doing things, plus I wasn't going to react to his poor me, child/victim/helpless persona that he is living at the moment. For one thing it will not help his recovery.
I am really sympathetic about the pain he is in, I want to do everything I possibly can to help him in these early days, but as they say, it takes two to tango, and for him to recover, he has to take head and do as is recommended.
I have to admit when he said to me ( after saying to him, in a kind way, he had been very mean to his friend) he said "I have in mind to send flowers to said friend and her daughter - would you like some" With said friends comment about he thinks he can treat me badly then make up with flowers! ring in my ear I said no. I have to say this was after a couple of hours moaning and complaining either at me or about others, while being all polite to the other three!
i also was trying not to generate negative feelings, while sorting social services I could hear him laughing and talking with his niece and nephew, interested in their lives. However, when trying to make conversation and distract him from his pain, I talked about my new appointment as a Governor and all the work around Christian Aid ( the latter he supports) but again he took no interest. I had missed my first governor meeting the night before, which was fine, my Dad comes first, but I was so sad that he wasn't even interested in my life.
I went home gone seven completely washed out to my lovely OH and my cats :TAs a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Hurrah for lovely OH's & cats though.I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.
Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
"A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb. ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.0 -
So In my diary, I had school assembly, but was so shattered, I decided that had to go.
Managed to get to friends for midday to go to the cash and carry, and bless her she was a great listening ear and than on our return gave me an impromptu lunch.
Must admit can't really remember the rest of the day. So tired...
Except to say carers are in place with Dad, spoke to him, he is struggling with the pain, and can't get his head around the fact that its going to be painful for some time to come. I am at a loss to know what to say.As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Difficult to know what to say.
Take care of you xxI am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.
Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
"A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb. ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.0 -
The focus today was Christian Aid at school.
I could be found at the school gate at the beginning and end of school, as my fellow volunteer said to me, its funny how you become invisible when you have a tabard on!
We handed out a lot of flyers about the big brekkie, and raised awareness
Managed to fit in a massage in between which was appreciated.
The rest of the day was preparing for the next dayAs a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0 -
Difficult to know what to say.
Take care of you xx
Just knowing you are thinking of me, is very lovely....As a dear MSE friend says “keep plodding” or
What does the saying say.... When life hands you lemons, make lemonade
Or as my Mum would say, brush yourself down, tomorrow is another day or
Fake it, to you Make It
Please say hello my new diary: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6578460/still-dancing-to-blow-the-debt-clouds-away0
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