Things you should not do...

sugarbaby125

do remember to turn the oven on before putting the joint or whole chicken in to roast.......or you will only discover your cold meat sitting in a cold oven when you go to turn it over half way through cooking time

Do not chop a fresh bell pepper, then absentmindedly wipe your hand across your eye unless you like extreme pain and a constantly streaming eye

do remember to put your skirt on before leaving the house (thank goodness I was wearing a half slip when I took my coat off at my sister's home)

Solstice_3

Oh these are so funnny, I've been sat here laughing out loud at quite a few of these

Mine have been covered, well except -

Don't attempt to force a stubborn runner bean through a runner bean slicer, my thumb is almost healed now.

Don't put your (young) Son's plastic dinner plate on the hob you just cooked with when dishing up dinner - they melt very quickly!

Do read the recipe at least twice before, and during cooking - anything, the amount of times I've missed an ingredient and realised after it's cooked, including sugar in muffins........

lisawood78

Not kitchen related but.... Don't accidentally set the emergency alarm off at your leisure centre mistakenly believing it to be the turnstile opening button....

greentiger

Oh love these - I think some of you have been spying on me!

Pressure cookers can also distribute gooseberry jam, seeds and all, quite successfully around the kitchen walls and ceiling.

Dom't forget to fix the lid on the liquidiser properly before turning it on. I've never made cream of chicken soup since.

Never ever think you can substitute condensed milk for evaporated milk. Nor think it would do when you're making macaroni cheese and have discovered there's no milk and nowhere nearby to buy some. No amount of salt will counteract the sweetness. ugh!

gayleygoo

Never forage for food without knowing exactly what you are looking for. A few years ago I wanted to make elderflower cordial, and a friend said he knew where there was loads of it. We went and gathered what we thought were elderflowers, although it grew on plants on the ground rather than trees. They didn't smell particularly good either, but we picked several bagfuls of the white flowers. When I got home I still wasn't sure, so googled for images, and decided that what we'd gathered wasn't the right stuff. We didn't know what it was - I assumed hogweed or something - so we threw it away.

This morning I learned it was HEMLOCK :eek: and can't believe how close I came to making a sweet poison syrup as a family drink.

Primrose

DO NOt allow your novice cook husband to handle and chop chillies by hand for a curry and then allow him to get caught short and rush to the loo for an urgent pee! You will spend the next few hours having to bathe the Crown Jewels in cold water, if you haven't already had to dial 999 for an ambulance to call out the paramedics :rotfl:

SIRENS

Don't decide to make chocolate rice crispies whilst your Mums abroad on her hols but use her best PLASTIC salad bowl to melt the chocolate over a pan of boiling water, not only did it melt but it also caught on fire.
Then don't make it worse on her return by denying she ever owned said bowl!

PenguinOfDeath

Don't retype a fairly substantial shopping list from your old phone to your brand new one that you're not too sure how to work yet, accidentally press a random button whilst just starting your shop, panic when it asks you if you want to delete the note and for some reason press ok, swear a bit too loudly for the middle of a supermarket then spend the next ten minutes frantically trying to remember what you went in for...

judi24

Don't wrap the remote for the bedroom Tv in the bedding and then put it in the wash!!! It didn't like it much! and has never worked again!

sillyvixen

Pootle_3 wrote: »

Please video and put on youtube!!


I am crying with laughter at this :-)

i wish i could, but aforementioned cat is no longer with us and i only have my memories of the event. shame really as i fancy a curry!!