Things you should not do...

sillyvixen

trying to save time - dont add hot coffee to a coffee cake - i ended up with sweet coffee flavored scrambled egg. i had hoped for an early night as i had an early start and wanted the cake to take on holiday. no early night as i had to start again after a visit to the 24 hour tesco for more ingredients and still did not have the sense to make my coffee before my late night shopping trip so still had to wait for it to cool!!

Lance_De_Boils

When, in order to save money while holidaying abroad, going back to your apartment to make coffees....do make sure that it is YOUR apartment that you make said coffees in.


I will never forget the faces of the other holidaymakers when they came in from their balcony and saw me brazenly putting the kettle on etc....

GreyQueen

Do not go to unlock your common-as-muck pale metallic green Ford Fiesta, find that someone has left a load of carp on your dashboard, stand there complaining to your companion when said car's owner arrives.

Your Fiesta is parked 3 spaces further up the street........

duchy

Do not put the chip pan on then walk into the next room to answer the phone and forget about it . When you remember and return to the kitchen to find the polystyrene tiles (this was a long time ago) on the ceiling alight and dropping off the ceiling and the kitchen curtains alight run out to the front garden where DIY challenged DH is very focused on mixing cement and tell him to come quick as the kitchen is on fire. You will realize he is not really listening and will reply "I can't come now I'm mixing cement." Instead grab daughter's swimsuit which is still damp and use that to put the flames out. It will work but will melt the swimsuit.
My Dad never lived that one down.

Don't forget you have an electric hob now and not a gas one and forget to turn the hob off before unwrapping chip shop chips and dumping the paper on the hob and go to eat in the other room.

If you are in the habit of leaving a low light on your gas hob on so you always have hot water available (a habit got into when your kitchen had no hot water) and burn through a kettle and your OH is annoyed about it.....don't do the same thing again with the new one less than a week later and decide not to tell him but buying an identical replacement and find a cunning hiding place for the wrecked one in a place-- he will never look-- until you can sneak it into the dustbin on bin day once he's left for work. For the first and only time ever in his life he will decide to open the washing machine and look inside !!

First and last courtesy of my parents -middle one was OH.

Primrose

GreyQueen wrote: »

Do not go to unlock your common-as-muck pale metallic green Ford Fiesta, find that someone has left a load of carp on your dashboard, stand there complaining to your companion when said car's owner arrives.

Your Fiesta is parked 3 spaces further up the street........

Oh I idenfy with that one. Years ago I had the same problem with an Identically coloured Hillman Imp parked in my company car park. When I finally discovered who the owner was, he laughingly confessed he had done the same thing to my car and only realised his mistake when he was actually sitting in the car ready to drive off and found his knees hunched up to his chin! He was very tall so had his seat pushed back much further than mine. I think car security systems are better these days!

This reminds me the time we last moved house. On the first day in our new home I absently mindedly drove home from work to our old house and couldn't understand why my house key would.no longer open the door.:rotfl:

stevefoss

Sue14 wrote: »

Don't spray wd40 onto the teeth of a paper shredder! I did this a few weeks ago, as our shredder wasn't working properly and I'd heard that you're supposed to oil it to keep it running smoothlylol!

I did that except it went whoof up in my face and i had singed eyebrows and eyelashes, and also a frazzled fringe, luckily it wasn't as bad as i thought at first, although i was so worried about what it would look like. DH said didnt i realise what would happen...... Well, no, of course not or i wouldn't have done it!:mad:
The shredder definitely didn't work after that!

Lizling

When transferring your newly assembled but unbaked tart into the oven, do not forget that the tart case has a removable base and put your hand right through the middle.

Me, this evening.

Bathory

Do not mistake grated nutmeg for black pepper and go sprinkling liberal amounts over apple crumble.

Also, although this was a long time ago when I was young and daft, do not go out wearing fishnet tights and mini skirt in hot sunny weather and lie around whilst getting burned. My legs were a very interesting pattern when I got home to change that day !!

GreyQueen

Don't drive your car to town, something you seldom do, and then forget that you didn't walk down as normal, walk a mile home and have heart failure when coming around the corner towards the house and finding your car isn't outside............... it was several seconds of OMG before the penny dropped............:rotfl:

Scorpio_girlie

Don't mistakenly pick up and use a tube of deep heat instead of canestan cream!