Coping with loneliness

catkins

I think there is some good advice on this thread.


It does sound as though you could be depressed - have you talked to your doctor at all? I suffer from depression and when I am very down I feel like I can't be bothered to do anything although I try and force myself as if not it can become a vicious circle.


If you like reading and crafting are there any groups you could join? There are often reading groups and I know where I live the local library and church have sewing, knitting and crochet groups. Is there anything like the WI in America?


As I said, don't really have any friends although I regard my OH as my best friend so when he is not at work we chat, go out for walks, go for coffee etc. I have made friends in the past through work or my dogs but it's down to me that we don't stay friends. I have a thing about people coming to my house (even struggle with family coming!) and also have some social phobias which don't help!


I understand you can't have a dog in your house because of your OH but what about offering to walk dogs for neighbours or slightly further afield? It could even offer you an opportunity to make some money. Dog walkers are pretty much in demand in the UK and can earn reasonable money. Is it the same there? It is almost impossible to walk a dog and not have people talk to you. You may be lucky and make a friend or two that way but even if not it means you will get to talk to someone.


If I didn't talk to people while on my dog walks I could go all day until OH gets home (which can sometimes be 9pm) without saying a word to another person. It wold be even worse when he is working away. I have got to know quite a few people through my dogs and I know at least a couple of them I could have become better friends with if I wanted.


Are you planning to stay in America? If so and it is important to you to make friends you do need to look into any clubs, social activities etc.


Could some of it be homesickness? I lived in France for a few years and although I loved it at the beginning, the last couple of years were probably the worst of my life. I was lonely, I missed my family like crazy and struggled badly with the language (at least you don't have that problem!). Once we came back to the UK I immediately felt happier

JennyRowling

The reason people feel lonely is not just because of the lack of other people around, but also because they have nothing to occupy their day with. If one has a not so pleasant work, they seek the better part of the day to be spent with friends and family. But if you don't even have that, then you better have a good hobby to give you a sense of achievement.

I recently moved to a new city and let's just say, I only contact with the people I know online. I haven't made any new friends yet and this task seems to become harder and harder with age. So, just look into the things that interest you the most and do something you enjoy. And, eventually, new people will find YOU.