Tell me to stop being silly? -___-

Katiehound

CH27 wrote: »

You are having problems with your eldest son hitting people & wanting attention away from the baby.
.

and a dog????!!!!

I despair.
Absolutely you do NOT need a dog. Please have happy, well balanced, well adjusted children first.

Kayalana99

Person_one wrote: »

Please please think more carefully about this. You're focusing on what you see as people 'having a go' at you, but try to look past that and see that we're genuinely incredibly concerned that you're going to make a huge mistake.

There will still be plenty of rescue dogs around in 4 or 5 years who will be perfect for your family, and your family will be more ready for them.

Tbh we have been thinking very carefully about this and it just isn't the right dog for us, she is amazing around children / adults as above but the not being able to be around other dogs is the main concern as all our family have dogs & we do a lot with them as a group (dogs invited ofc) at first we were thinking we don't have a dog its fine but coming to realise it isn't practical.

The consideration that I wouldn't be able to hold DS1 hand down the park, push a pram & hold a lead ~ I would have to leave the dog at home if I went to the post office (practically daily trip) as couldn't just leave her outside.

That said I am finding it hard to say no as the possibilty of JUST fostering for a short period is open to us, if we are not to foster poor dog gets put in a kennel with her worse nightmare...other dogs. Ofc she will be separated but is going to get stressed out.

They are struggling for getting a foster home because the obvious that anyone willing to foster a dog usually has one...and the ones that don't have cats etc (They don't want the dog around pets whatsoever)

I was perhaps thinking of offering a month ..perhaps two max so they have more time to find a permanent foster home / adoptive home for her?

It seems most of your concern is the fact we will take a dog in and abandon it again but surely it's better for us to foster then stuck in a kennel? Or are you just all against it because of the children being so little?

DS1 is a pain but he is also very ignorant towards dogs / cats anything really. He just gets frustrated if you take something off him and he expresses himself by hitting which I don't see it as a major problem at all but something that needs to be addressed over time.

Caroline_a

Kayalana99 wrote: »

DS1 is a pain but he is also very ignorant towards dogs / cats anything really. He just gets frustrated if you take something off him and he expresses himself by hitting which I don't see it as a major problem at all but something that needs to be addressed over time.

So what if he hits the dog and the dog bites him? Poor dog gets put down, child gets a fear/hatred of dogs. How experienced are you with dogs to teach a young child? Another of your threads was a general moan (which is ok as we all go through those times) about feeling trapped and not being able to do anything on your own - how much more 'tied' will you be with a dog that you cannot leave alone with your children!

Kayalana99

Caroline_a wrote: »

So what if he hits the dog and the dog bites him? Poor dog gets put down, child gets a fear/hatred of dogs. How experienced are you with dogs to teach a young child? Another of your threads was a general moan (which is ok as we all go through those times) about feeling trapped and not being able to do anything on your own - how much more 'tied' will you be with a dog that you cannot leave alone with your children!

You can never say never but DS1 wouldn't hit a dog, he'd have no reason to, he doesn't just go round hitting people/things for no reason + even if he did the dog would think she was being pat... he's not even near the two mark yet

balletshoes

Kayalana99 wrote: »

Tbh we have been thinking very carefully about this and it just isn't the right dog for us, she is amazing around children / adults as above but the not being able to be around other dogs is the main concern as all our family have dogs & we do a lot with them as a group (dogs invited ofc) at first we were thinking we don't have a dog its fine but coming to realise it isn't practical.

The consideration that I wouldn't be able to hold DS1 hand down the park, push a pram & hold a lead ~ I would have to leave the dog at home if I went to the post office (practically daily trip) as couldn't just leave her outside.

That said I am finding it hard to say no as the possibilty of JUST fostering for a short period is open to us, if we are not to foster poor dog gets put in a kennel with her worse nightmare...other dogs. Ofc she will be separated but is going to get stressed out.

They are struggling for getting a foster home because the obvious that anyone willing to foster a dog usually has one...and the ones that don't have cats etc (They don't want the dog around pets whatsoever)

I was perhaps thinking of offering a month ..perhaps two max so they have more time to find a permanent foster home / adoptive home for her?

It seems most of your concern is the fact we will take a dog in and abandon it again but surely it's better for us to foster then stuck in a kennel?
Or are you just all against it because of the children being so little?

DS1 is a pain but he is also very ignorant towards dogs / cats anything really. He just gets frustrated if you take something off him and he expresses himself by hitting which I don't see it as a major problem at all but something that needs to be addressed over time.

the overwhelming impression i'm getting from the replies to your posts in this thread OP, is that the children are too young right now, for you to be contemplating taking on a dog - and I agree.

Person_one

I'm starting to think there's very little point responding now, if I knew you in real life I'd beg and plead with you not to bring into your home right now. Not even a foster, just be patient! This definitely does have all the hallmarks of one of those projects you talked about in the earlier thread. You've got a one track mind about dogs at the moment, but taking on a dog isn't going to make you happy and stop you getting bored/restless, it will only make things a million times harder and add more tasks to your daily routine!

Katiehound

Kayalana99 wrote: »

It seems most of your concern is the fact we will take a dog in and abandon it again but surely it's better for us to foster then stuck in a kennel? Or are you just all against it because of the children being so little?

DS1 is a pain but he is also very ignorant towards dogs / cats anything really. He just gets frustrated if you take something off him and he expresses himself by hitting which I don't see it as a major problem at all but something that needs to be addressed over time.

So your eldest is ignorant towards animals and he hits out. What happens when he hits out at a dog who then bites him? which is a very likely scenario- then the dog loses its life!It is an absolute NO NO.

No, it would not be better for a dog to be fostered by you. You don't have the time to socialise or train the dog, you need to concentrate on your children

Your question was "Am I being silly??"
Really I can't give you a polite answer....you are being utterly thoughtless, ridiculous, self centred..........in a way like a child having a tantrum who just won't listen to reason.

Better the dog be with other dogs then be dead.

What is the point of asking these questions when you take no notice?
From my understanding the folk who have answered your questions are well experienced with dog owning, they are telling you things from past experience and giving good reasons in the interests of the dog, safety and your children's welfare but......you don't take it on board.
It is not a personal grudge against you, it is to help.

ClareTeaches

Kayalana99 wrote:

DS1 is a pain but he is also very ignorant towards dogs / cats anything really. He just gets frustrated if you take something off him and he expresses himself by hitting which I don't see it as a major problem at all but something that needs to be addressed over time.

It isn't a major problem until you turn your back for 2 seconds, the dog takes something from your child and the child hits the dog. What will the dog's reaction be?

You seeing this as 'not an issue' shows why you're not yet suitable to have a dog - it isn't necessarily an issue from a parenting standpoint and can be addressed over time, as you suggest, but when you throw an animal into the mix, it becomes an entirely different ballgame. What happens when your child hits the dog and the dog reacts?

Your lack of doggy experience is showing here. Please listen to he advice that has been given and wait. Volunteer at a rescue centre and get more experience with dogs. If you're still keen to get a dog when your children are older (5+), then you'll be a much better and more responsible owner for it and the lovely canine companion you take in (carefully chosen and right for your situation) will make you so happy you waited.

Katiehound

Kayalana99 wrote: »

Most have been concerned about me taking on the dog and not realising how much work it was...as to why I suggested fostering temporary for at least the dogs sake(or so I was asking if that would be better). People have told me to steer clear of dogs with an unknown past and I have listened...this dog comes from someone who is actually a dog behaviourist & is currently living with a three year old and a baby.
QUOTE]

Even a temporary foster involves the same amount of work as a forever home. The idea of fostering is not only to get the dog out of the kennel situation but to give the dog a better chance of a forever home because they will be better socialised, house trained.. whatever.

What is the current owner's viewpoint?

Sorry, I still say your children are too young.
It's a big safety issue for starters. With 2 young children you are not an experienced parent. You are not an experienced dog owner.
You can never ever ever leave a dog with a young child unattended.
You are being irresponsible even considering this...at the moment you need to concentrate on children or dog... and of course, you can't rehome your children!! seriously... please consider a dog when the children are appreciably older.

Kayalana99

Thank you muchly, but I will leave it here.