Money Moral Dilemma: Should we have paid for restaurant owner's birthday meal?

tain

Your mate is totally in the wrong. However you've kind of made your own problems.

- Should have asked if it was going to cost rather than presume.

- Dont pay up then whinge about it later. Unless you plan on asking for the cash back, what good is it going to do?

Myrtle77

Our local pub landlord pulled a similar 'swift one' last year. We never went in again, so whatever profit he made on the night, he soon lost because of reduced local trade.

No one likes being taken for a mug.

Mojisola

MSE_Darryl wrote: »

she invited us to her birthday do there.

tain wrote: »

- Should have asked if it was going to cost rather than presume.

When you get an invite to a birthday celebration, do you really ask "How much is this going to cost me?"

Leeds_Lad_Michael

Sooler wrote: »

She’s no friend, she took you as mugs. You’ve been fleeced.

As it involved her business, leave a review an Tripadvisor.

Exactly what I would do in the situation. Assuming the date you were there was her birthday diarise it now to book a table in the nearest restaurant in competition to her, and invite a few mutual friends along the way.

I don't think it should have been up to you to have asked whether it was chargeable or not, had you have said 'oh £150 ?' some people around you would have made a remark to others on the sly, despite half probably thinking the same as yourselves.

On the positive, you know for future reference she is really isn't any kind of friend whatsoever, and you won't be spending any money in there again nor providing them with presents of champagne.

duchy

Was this "a friend my wife has been close to since schooldays" or "an old schoolfriend who nowadays more of an aquaintance but has been networking since she opened her business locally"

If the former she was out of order -but then as close friends your wife would have known she couldn't afford a freebie so early in the setting up of the business ..........if the latter maybe your wife and she don't see their friendship in quite the same way ?

Friendship covers a very broad range

tonymacaroni_2

I had a similar experience not too long ago. Slightly less money but still just over £100.
Whilst I agree there can be misunderstanding in the invites as to what is and what isn't included, the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back for me was the SERVICE CHARGE! For a 'birthday party' in one's own restaurant, there is simply no need for this.
I too was charged a whopping 15% on top of full-up money and I just found it insulting.

Best advise (and as many have said prior), vote with your feet and take your money elsewhere and chalk it up to experience.

Cookie1986

It’s is a bit cheeky but it sounds like your friend had an excellent birthday anyway :rotfl:

It’s probably too late to say anything now so I would leave it as a lesson learnt. I would avoid going to any further parties at her restaurant.
As for the service charge I think in any situation they are disgraceful. If a restaurant adds a service charge I always refuse to pay it!:mad:

gaving7095

WOW LOL - Sorry to laugh but that's seriously rich of her.
I mean it clearly wasn't even a discounted rate, AND not mentioned beforehand... Boy I would not have paid because that's so unreasonable. Who CHARGES you to attend a birthday party? Possibly give her a £75 invoice for the wine? That's effectively precisely what she has done to you.

And since when do you have a PAY to go to somebody's birthday party? Not only has she used the opportunity of putting on a hopefully-good party for cheap, with a "free" venue (which is fine - she owns the place), but she's actually used it as an EARNING opportunity. "Happy birthday to me". Sickening.

In my opinion, this person is not your friend - not one worth keeping in any case.

BUT your question is "Should we say something?". And achieve what, exactly, by doing so? Money back or an apology? I would sincerely doubt you'd get either from somebody who was prepared to pull that level of B.S. in the first place.

The fact remains that you DID pay, so no - it's too late I think. Just move on - ditch this toxic person from your life, because she sucks!

Nada666

Why are people moaning about the service charge? Why should the waiters and cooks not receive their usual remuneration?

The_Wise_One

OMG I can't quite believe some of the answers here - though I especially like roses' and lutzi1's comments. For the others, hindsight is truly wonderful!

You get an invitation to a birthday party, from what you say, one that doesn't say you'll be charged. You go. You eat, drink an be merry. You say 'happy birthday' and 'thank you' and leave! I really don't think I'd have paid a penny and I'm sure she wouldn't have had a leg to stand on. Let's all learn from this!