Only freedom will do

earthgirl

edinburgher wrote: »

I can't believe that tomorrow is Monday, where has the weekend gone?

We had a lovely relaxing one, apart from more cookery projects than I probably should have attempted. I think that I need to relax a little more with some of the household stuff.

It has been a very introspective few days for me, with good chats with Mrs E (and over on Earthgirl's thread, among others).

I was banned from taking part in a certain bookie promotion that was very generous (£800 or so in the last 6 months). While I initially felt rotten (losing a bookie is like losing a job!), I realised pretty soon afterwords that the promotion was eating up a couple of hours every weekend and was stressing me out quite a bit.

I am starting to realise that FI is about more than just having a big pile of money and then stepping back from the world. I need to take a look at some things that I can do to improve our quality of life in the here and now, because it's not enough to live life frazzled if it means getting out in 15 years (best case scenario). 15 years is a long time

Oddly enough, a solid think about the things that matter to me doesn't feature money, it's only a sticking plaster for things that annoy me about day-to-day life. Finding meaningful work, giving something back to the community and trying to recapture some of the more open and trusting nature that I had as a younger man are the areas that I'd like to focus on. I've also started trying to improve my health and ability to relax, but it's not an overnight fix.

To that end, I will be making a few changes. I have an embryonic career change in mind that could hopefully be achieved within a year (big pay drop, but much higher salary [STRIKE]if[/STRIKE] when I succeed), I will be starting to support some charities again and I will try to treat everyone I meet with openness, not cynicism.

A lot to be achieved :j

Go for it. I agree you never get the time back!

ajmoney

edinburgher wrote: »

Even sillier, it's a free car park!

Same as me then, ignore it. If you have a look at the charge notice they send out, I can't remember what type of court it is they say they will take you to but they don't exist in Scotland. Once again if you panic about the moral "I should pay" then read about it on here. So many people have ignored them. You get about 5 letters each one the cost gets more until the final one where as a goodwill gesture they say they will drop the price...they generally stop after that!

AlexLK

edinburgher wrote: »

Even sillier, it's a free car park!

In England, they can only recover loss of earnings, i.e. the cost of parking. If this is the case in Scotland, this is not legally enforceable. Do please check though as I know the law is different in Scotland.

Karmacat wrote: »

This is crazy! I'd ignored English experience, but in supermarket car parks, you often get private firms telling you to pay fines, as Alex mentions, and they're not legally enforceable at all. If its the same in Scotland, then I vote for Al's method: FI for baby E :j

What would £40 invested at birth be likely to make in circa 60 years? I can imagine it's quite a lot more than the amount invested.

in_need_of_direction

Alternatively you could give half to a hospital charity and half to toots.

Alchemilla

I was induced with #1. All fine.

edinburgher

What would £40 invested at birth be likely to make in circa 60 years? I can imagine it's quite a lot more than the amount invested.

£934 assuming 5% return

Alternatively you could give half to a hospital charity and half to toots.

Also a good idea.

Not at all sure about the concept of a pension for a child. Lord knows how old she'll be before she can use it!

turtlemoose

Just a quickie, I'm afraid your comment "risk of stillbirth ramps up at 42 weeks" has been playing on my mind overnight. It sounds like something an arrogant doctor would say to scare a patient in to a medically managed birth. I will say this, and this only, and then leave the topic alone as this is a MF board not a birth choices board

The risk of unexplained stillbirth at 43 weeks is almost the same as at 37 weeks. We don't routinely do inductions at 37 weeks (unless there's an underlying medical need) so why is 42 the magic number? The risk of unexplained stillbirth at 42 weeks is less than that at 38 weeks and we don't generally induce then either. The placenta is not a ticking time bomb that expires on a date chosen by doctors.

Taken from AIMS induction booklet:
The risk of unexplained stillbirth is -
35 weeks - 1 in 500
36 weeks - 1 in 556
37 weeks - 1 in 645
38 weeks - 1 in 730
39 weeks - 1 in 840
40 weeks - 1 in 926
41 weeks - 1 in 826
42 weeks - 1 in 769
43 weeks - 1 in 633

edinburgher

Turtlemoose, thank you for that.

I must just sound arrogant by nature, because that was me paraphrasing a random website (think it was the NCT)?

At the same time, I don't think we can compare pre-term and post-term stillbirth rates, as there are different complications that will be more prevalent depending on whether a baby is early or late?

Statistically, a change of nearly 17% between weeks 40 and 42 would concern me, while 32% between 40 and 43 scares the crap out of me!

In any case, as a couple who have recently lost a baby, we will allow ourselves to be led by our caring medical professionals. Midwives in our area are all staunchly pro natural birth, so I have every confidence that they will not suggest anything for the sake of convenience.

turtlemoose

argh I said I wouldn't say anything else! But you missed a key point. You say you cannot compare pre- and post- term stillbirth rates due to different complications. This isn't. This is unexplained stillbirths.

However, I am not trying to convince you of anything, merely being informative. I'm aware of your personal situation and you must both make the right choice for your circumstances. It was simply that "ramps up" wording that kept niggling at me.

/end topic

edinburgher

Not seeing where your view of the world differs so radically from mine, but will agree to leave it at that, your niggle arose from my chosen semantics, after all