Fear of doctors!

Lara44

I was extremely scared of going to the Drs until I went to a part of the world where there *were* no Drs.

Now I realise the only thing more scary than going to the surgery is being left to cope with an uncontrollable medical situation alone!

I can't say I have an awesome time at the GPs, but it was certainly a much needed dose of perspective.

Georgiegirl256

lostinrates wrote: »

Hahaha, you've reminded me, I hate eyeclinic. Its relatively inoffensive really, and people are surprised I hate it so much but I find the whole thing quite difficult. From the waiting room where patients are rude to staff and staff are terse too, through to step one of the eyedrops being dropped from above so they pummel the eye. On reflex I have been known to dodge, which makes the nurses very short with one, and its very difficult to explain I already am expending a lot of attempt at self control because they have been so rude and the stress of waiting is so extreme that I feel a little low on self control and the blink is hard to avoid!

Then the eye tests, where its hard not to do your best and the disablement of not looking left or right for visual field tests is so alien.

Its always a long stressful afternoon, even though its the least offensive 'thing' I do practically I think.

Yeah, it's a weird phobia I guess. I think people are surprised too when I mention it to them.

I'm sure that my fear of them stems from nearly passing out there once. It was a warm day, and I was feeling hot and bothered anyhow, then that combined with somehow managing to see the reflection of the back of my eye left me feeling really light headed and queasy. That and the fact my Mam has had numerous eye problems (she goes to the eye clinics you mention above) has left me fearful of them.

Bangton

I hate going to the doctors. It's what I fear the most. tbh I've had quite a few incidences of them being offhand/rude/cold and I guess it's caused a fear because I'm vulnerable and reliant on their help.

my last doctor was vile. . and was known for it in the area. He obviously hated his job and would make snide comments about being an nhs walk in centre. If you went with anything complex he 'didn't have time in 8 minutes to help'. I know they're under pressure but he was just mean.

I swapped docs after having my son because I knew I'd have problems taking him if anything was wrong.

Sadly I'm still scared and really always have been. .

Morglin

I have the opposite problem - I have a lot of health problems (too boring to relate!), and on their insistence, and because of medication, I have to see an awful lot of doctors, week in, week out....:eek:

However, because they have misdiagnosed, mis-prescribed and incorrectly treated me so many times, resulting in them nearly killing me, on more than one occasion, I don't trust them, and disregard most of what they say, which they find difficult.

I am always polite as I bat away their advice (and to be fair to, they do acknowledge that my gung-ho approach to my main health issue does actually work for me, despite it going against most of their pre conceived notions of how I should be carrying on, and how I should be at this stage of a degenerative disease.)

But, the medics and I are in this circle of having to see each other a huge amount, because of the necessity of monitoring medication etc. and achieving nothing much other than having a battle of wills!

But, for those with a phobia, it is difficult and if took me years to overcome my fear of needles (pregnancy sorted that out) and a fear of dentists (abscess on tooth sorted that one). They can be overcome but they do take a lot of determination.

Good luck.

Lin

fozziebeartoo

I wouldn't say I had a fear of Drs....

But I cry.

Always.

So did my Mum.

I think its genetic!!

I have had 2 GP's for long periods of time and they used to get the tissues out as I walked in.....:o

lostinrates

Morglin wrote: »

I have the opposite problem - I have a lot of health problems (too boring to relate!), and on their insistence, and because of medication, I have to see an awful lot of doctors, week in, week out....:eek:

However, because they have misdiagnosed, mid prescribed and incorrectly treated me do many times, resulting in them nearly killing me, on more than one occasion, I don't trust them, and disregard most of what they say, which they find difficult.

I am always polite as I bat away their advice (and to be fair to, they do acknowledge that my gung-ho approach to my main health issue does actually work for me, despite it going against most of theirpre conceived notions of how I should be carrying on, and how I should be at this stage of a degenerative disease.)

But, the medics and I are in this circle of having to see each other a huge amount, because of the necessity of monitoring medication etc. and achieving nothing much other than having a battle of wills!

But, for those with a phobia, it is difficult and if took me years to overcome my fear of needles (pregnancy sorted that out) and a fear of dentists (abscess on tooth sorted that one). They can be overcome but they do take a lot of determination.

Good luck.

Lin

This is a lot of what I have done, but its now starting to catch up with me I think. It doesn't make me less fearful. The lack of trust is exactly WHY I am fearful!

daisiegg

fozziebeartoo wrote: »

I wouldn't say I had a fear of Drs....

But I cry.

Always.

So did my Mum.

I think its genetic!!

I have had 2 GP's for long periods of time and they used to get the tissues out as I walked in.....:o

This is more common than you think. My sister is almost a doctor and she says people ALWAYS cry at the GP. Even when they are there for something really simple and not upsetting at all. It is just the situation, the focus of having someone in a room looking at you and asking you questions. She said probably 70% of appointments a GP would have in a day have a crying patient! ( in her experience anyway, which is obviously not extensive, having been only a trainee sitting in)

daisiegg

I don't mind doctors but am realising I have a bit of a fear of hospitals - sure that is very common. I have not been in hospital much in my life, luckily, but the occasions I have stand out - emergency surgery for an almost burst appendix as a child, meningitis as a teenager and, a few years ago, nearly dying of anaphylactic shock.

I think it was the meningitis experience that has really scarred me. The nurses were very unkind and clearly thought I was making a fuss. I had a lumbar puncture performed by a junior doctor that I'm sure was more painful than it should have been (and I have had lower back pain ever since) and they would not let you move after the procedure for 8 hours. Well, I had terrible d&v. As well as having my period! So having horrendous diarrhoea in a bedpan and having nurses having to change my sanitary pads, all whilst in a MIXED WARD with just a flimsy curtain round the bed that didn't even close all the way, and very unfriendly nurses who made it clear that they were extremely unimpressed with having to deal with my bedpan issues....was just awful It brings me out in a cold sweat just thinking about it. It was one of the most humiliating experiences of my life, not to mention how unwell I felt. I remember an older gentleman from the bed opposite coming over and helping me vomit into a dish as there were no nurses to be seen and I was not allowed to sit up. Another patient came and tied my hair up for me to keep it out of the way. The kindness of strangers!

Oops, went slightly off topic, but I think my point is, although my issue is not directly with doctors (if anything I think it is nurses more than doctors!) I completely understand and I'm sure you are not alone.

I am currently pregnant so having to get over my worries about hospitals very quickly, not least because I will probably end up giving birth in one. It does scare me and makes me feel sick to think of it but there is not a lot I can do!

Gigervamp

picklekin wrote: »

I don't fear doctors but I am with you on the pestering side of things, I am another one who used to avoid smear tests and.. heaven forbid, I used to smoke, I also like the odd glass of wine. I used to get bugged about this every time I went, and it just made me not want to go. Whilst I hear your story Ginger and can't imagine what it must be like to go through this, I think we can receive the information and make up our own minds. Not be nagged at like a small child when we go to the doctors.. I now have my smear and don't smoke, but neither of these things were done because a doctor nagged at me!

I agree about the pestering.

Just after my treatments ended, I needed to go to the docs to get a new prescription for pain meds. The only doctor who I could get an appointment with, I'd been warned by MIL that she was a rubbish doctor.

That day, she was filming the consultations, but I declined permission. We discussed the fact that I had cervical cancer and what meds I needed, and she wrote out a prescription. As I stood up to leave, she looked at her computer and said, "It says here that you haven't had a smear recently." I looked at her incredulously. "Erm, I have cervical cancer." I said. "Well, you need to book a smear." said she. :eek: I mumbled something and left, wishing that I'd agreed to the filming so the practice manager could see what she'd said.

hazyjo

Sorry for long reply - trying to answer most of you.

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Blimey, I wasn't expecting such a response. As much as I wouldn't wish it on anyone, I'm so glad I'm not alone!

Lostinrates, I too am extremely pragmatic. I would even calm a friend who needed to go to the docs (for a smear or otherwise!). I'm fine going to a hospital (duloch), but it's just the doctors. I think it's this fear of being 'told off' or being told something awful. I don't know where the first fear comes from - maybe my weight, maybe that I'm not very fit, maybe that they'll start going on about diabetes and all sorts. Thing is - I KNOW ALL THAT!

I always think something is wrong with me. I mean ALL the time. I'm convinced I have all sorts of things (cancer/tumours, diabetes, MS, ME, Fibro-wotsit, polycystic ovaries, cysts, fybroids, high/low blood pressure, alzheimers, blocked arteries... honestly, the list goes on), even though I obviously know that fear isn't real (or I really would do something about it).

I don't really have signs, I just panic every time I get slight pins and needles in fingertips (rarely), if I jolt awake when asleep (yeah, I know fairly common, and it happens rarely again), heartbeat speeds up after eating or drinking lots (only noticed that after my ex was in hospital twice with suspected heart attack, turned out to be atrial fibrillation), I've always had loads of stomach cramps - mainly when hungry, my throat/chest makes silly little gurgly noises - always thought I was dying but have found a forum where there are hundreds of us with this still undiagnosed 'thing' (I really can live with it - it has a few weird things as part of it such as not breathing well if in a swimming pool/deep water after eating - it's like my mouth fills up with water and I'm going to be sick, and I can't lie down for around 3 hours after eating or I'll wake up choking, but, really, nothing I can't live with. Have never mentioned to a doctor as an adult (was x-rayed and tested for a 'cure' as a child - no real results).

I am going to change to the BF's doctor. I got upset last night and the BF said 'you've looked after me for long enough, my turn to help you - said he'd sort out all the appointments for me and come in with me if I want. I'll go in on my own I think, but I will get him to book it all and mention that I'm a bit doctors-phobic ('iatrophobic' - thanks!).

I had horrendous vertigo around 8 years ago and hadn't registered with a new doc yet (had been in just under a year). I spent 2 days in bed convinced I had a brain tumour prepared to die. (The worst thing ever - like being the drunkest you've ever been (so that you throw up every time you move) on the rockiest boat. Yes, really that bad. I got a cab straight to hospital on Day 3 (couldn't have got in a car/ambulance before that).

Like with Goldiegirl, it was because I'd had an ear infection and had ignored it. It wasn't hurting, but I'd had a cold and my ear was blocked (sounded like a scrunchy carrier bag in my ear). I kept thinking it'd go, but it led to vertigo (have had it once more since that first episode).

I don't like rude/stroppy docs who are short with you. Maybe it's an authority thing. Maybe it's my own lack of confidence (you wouldn't believe it lol - but the strangest scenarios scare all of us!).

I got my last asthma pumps from the online doctor associated with one of the main chemists (I forget). They had to ring for a consultation and she was so lovely I could've hugged her down the phone.

I suppose people deal differently with being ill. I revert to being a child and need lots of sympathy and looking after (make my BF stroke my hair and say there there lol). Others don't want anyone near them and go hide 'til they're better. Again, I think that's a big part of why I don't want to sit in front of some unsympathetic doctor.

I can't do the 'puff of air' thing in the opticians. Can't bear anything near my eyes (can't catch - I just squint and duck). I now pre-warn them as one got very stroppy with me. When I went the other week, I explained first and he was so good with me. I think he still couldn't understand that I couldn't sit there without blinking/squinting/flickering, but he was patient and did what he could.

fivetide - nope, it's all doctors - unless I get in there and they're nice to me - then I'm fine Actually, I think I prefer male doctors.

elsien I have tonnes of surgeries near me. I'm going to a small one the BF uses - very old fashioned one like an old house. I like the sound of it. There's only a couple of docs there (the main one the BF saw was very good with him and she's not skinny which I think helps me psychologically!). The BF has body dysmorphia (my diagnosis(!) but very obvious) and didn't want to know his weight. She was pretty good about it.

Buick - yep, that probably is part of it too. I don't like the thought of a stranger looking at me 'down there'. I wouldn't choose not to have one done. I want one - I just put it off. I don't think they struck me off for not having a smear, it was cos they'd written to me and I'd not replied. They probably thought I'd moved (which I had). Hopefully they've still got all my records!! I presume so. The woman I spoke with when I tried to make an appointment was VERY rude and off (before I'd even given my name). Everything was obviously an effort. She said about an appt on a Tuesday and I said the Mon would be better and she said they didn't do it on a Mon. I'd rang the month before and had been told it was Monday PM or Tuesday AM. She denied it.

Gigervamp - as said, I really am lost for words. I've always had them. I never used to put them off. I was several years late for the last one (2007) and was obviously due one a few years ago. I was selling my house in 2010 when next one due, eventually moved in 2011 - and then it was one thing after another. FIL died (cancer), my dad died (6 year battle with cancer), my cat died, I got divorced, had lots of probs with the next BF (now sorted/life is good), sold up/bought another house, friend diagnosed with pancreatic tumour - it has been Stress City. I have no idea how I've coped. Lots of other smaller things too that seemed fairly major at the time. Yes, I could have fitted a test in, but it's more that I was in a horrendous state emotionally and didn't want to walk in and collapse in front of a doctor/nurse. I might still, but at least I'm through the 'four year long bad patch'. Thinking of you - thanks for being so open. Brave lady.

bagpussbear - I won't look at them, but I can cope with them. Wouldn't put me off an op or anything (see, I really want to lecture you now and tell you to book that appt and don't look at the needle!) and how it'll always be niggling in the back of your mind and you'll feel much calmer even for having booked the appt!

Callie22 - you have my sympathy. Reading yours, it's so logical, I just want to say try to turn it around, act the part of someone else, try to find something fun/nice to do after (I'm not going before work now but taking the day off and going for lunch/pub with BF after). It's so straightforward - but then I remember my post and how, actually, it's easier to say these things than do them lol.

Goldiegirl

My sis has NEVER had an eye test, despite my dad having had glaucoma. I lecture her, and get my mum to lecture her, but she's still not been. Maybe it's a bit of a trait (although I was adopted) where we have this fear. Maybe my mum took us somewhere as kids that put the fear of god into us lol! Who knows. READ MY THING ABOUT VERTIGO ABOVE! Please never put off anything with your ears. Don't end up with what I had. Whoah I wouldn't even wish that on my line manager lol (well, maybe!). Always go to the hospital for things like that. There'll be a doctor you can see. It's less scary for some strange reason! I bypassed the doc completely (until follow up appt after). They suspected Meniere's when I first went, so get that checked out. Might not be wax - mine wasn't really, more of the tiny ear 'hairs' lying flat instead of upright or something like that and something to do with fluid. No offence to doctors, but I don't trust them with the complicated stuff. Hospitals IMO are far better cos they can look and then can refer you or call an expert in.

Jackyann/heartbreak star

I have the same fear about the nurse as I do the doctor. Not sure it'd help - but will have to see both to register, and will get the BF to say I'm nervous. If I go and find a nice one, the fear will go (lots, not completely). I won't dread the next appt. I think I prefer knowing who I'm going to get (small surgery) rather than worrying about what they'll be like.

daisiegg - you have helped too lol! OMG 70%! I thought I was alone 'til this thread. Congrats, btw. I'm fine with hospitals, weirdly! I feel safer. That's an awful story. I'm covered under private which is very reassuring - my friend was in a mixed ward when she had a brain tumour (so lots of brain/head issues - not the best ward). Some bloke (called Bernard - I even remember his name) grabbed her ankles in the middle of the night and woke her up screaming! I also had suspected meningitis but was a baby (lumbar puncture, etc). Maybe that scarred me mentally!

Thanks to all the others for replying/sharing too. So much appreciated - and I do think it's helped. BF is picking up the forms, etc for new docs today and will deal with all the 'faff' for me. That's a massive help.

Jx