I Appreciate the thought, but...

sugargurlie

Leave them at granny's to play with there. If they bring something back pop it back in their bag to go back with them next time they go. I do this and it never causes offence, I just say my DS wanted to take it to play with.

If it is less a space issue and more you don't want them spoiled, well that is harder to manage. You could try having an honest talk, and suggest putting money in a bank, or buying clothes instead, or even taking them for new shoes. Find a way to have this discussion. It is hard, but if you get it right now it should make it easier as time goes on before they start buying them tvs and mobile phones. We had the discussion with the parents right at the start so now our little one gets some treats, some clothes and some savings! The sets of grandparents take it in turns to buy shoes too which delights them and saves us.

picklekin

I agree its an issue, my nephew has SO many toys but seems to have little attention span as there is always something new to play with, at Easter I went over and gave him an egg, he looked at it and went "What else have you got for me?". I was shocked and a bit hurt, I guess so many people come and give children things these days that's what they see new people as, toy vending machines. All the toys are smashed together and uncared for, why cherish something when you'll get something new in 5 minutes?

I would get your OH to speak to her, and I think the savings account is a good idea.

dizziblonde

I think I can probably win with sheer size of toys bought - but my mum is involved with a community group closing their creche so she's bought a lot of their bigger toys - stuff we'd not be able to afford otherwise that they were getting rid of. It being garden toy stuff it's great... doesn't clog the house and my eldest will play in the garden all day given half the chance (thus not making the house a tip either). Currently got a sandpit, climbing frame and playhouse I need to figure out how to get down here from hers - and a giant connect 4 came down recently too (which the pieces just get used as hats from!)

Perhaps channel her into a specific toy-shopping direction so it's not just indiscriminate piles of whatever's on cheap? We've done this in terms of garden toys and also Happyland - so she can go buy a random Happyland figure or little playset that feeds into a bigger set of toys and thus actually stands a chance of getting used. Perhaps since you've mentioned a lot of train stuff - one of those wooden trainsets that all the stores seem to do that are interchangeable across brands - you could direct her toward picking up an "oooh he'd love some buildings or track pieces to go with it if you're wanting to buy him something" or similar (and if it's got a resale value all the better for when it's outgrown)?

XRAT

Dear Fredula,
You're not alone. I remember the age when Christmas brought huge plastic push along toys, praise the lord all that's over!
(We moved to a bigger house by the February)
I think the answer is "home toys" and "in-laws-house toys" allow your child to SWAP them one for one if he wants, but ensure that the small ones come home and the big ones go to granny!

florere

Ithink that the kindest way to do it could be to go for the space thing, tell her all the toy boxes at your house are full, and could she keep the toys she buys at her house for him to play with while he is there, it might make her think when they start to pile up, or suggest that rather than buy toys, she buys books, at least that will help to encourage him to read.

Atomix

Ebay

is your friend -

smile24

I have this problem; The in-laws buy piles of stuff from car boot sales for my 2 year old. All in good condition but we ran out of space.
OH asked them to keep any new toys round their house as is bigger than ours. They have her 1 day a week and we visit at weekends so she has lots of time to enjoy them at their house.
This went down OK and they now ask if there is anything we want from the car boot sales/shops otherwise all toys they buy stay with them. I would say they have twice as many toys in their house as we do in ours.
I would therefore go down the running out of space thing especially as you live with your parents at the moment.

sugarbaby125

Be prepared for hurt feelings on your MIL's side, no matter how tactfully you try to discuss the issue of toys with her. I am a Nursery Nurse and it is really damaging to the educational development of nursery age children for them to overloaded with toys. It does spoil children and they disengage from the toys.

I have 4 children, 32, 31, 21 and 13 and 4 grandchildren 14,12,8, and 7. I never overbought toys for my children or grandchildren or allowed any of my very large family members to do so.

I have so many nephews and nieces who are always having unrealistic expectations of gifts, but last Christmas my 4 children, 4 grandchildren, Son In Law and other family members were given gifts that cost a maximum of £25. Everyone was happy with their gifts.

I can see that you have really valid concerns about how materialistic all this buying of toys your son does not need will have on your son.

I wish you luck with talking to your MIL, but be prepared for her to be offended, insulted and not listen to your point of view.

Nannypoohs

Maybe you should tell her that your friends parents often buy their granchildren clothes or shoes instead of toys, this is usually very acceptable to all involved and the child is still very happy to receive any gifts that their grandparents buy them.
Everybody is happy!

jayess_2

fiscalfreckles wrote: »

I would say something. Or get your OH to.

I'd say that you don't have the space & could she keep some of it at hers? I'm sure she'll appreciate the storage problems once it all starts to mount up in her house.
Also point out that surely it will make it harder for her to buy a special treat for his birthday or Christmas, if he gets so much stuff each week? I'm sure she doesn't see it as spoiling him, but I would tend to agree with you.

My thoughts too! I would also suggest that you know she likes to get things for him so maybe she could start a savings account for when he may go to University or the like (or buy clothes instead?).