talk me down please

Pollycat

Thinking of you, Melly. :grouphug:

I'm not sure I understand what your issues are or what started them off (I followed you here from your 'stray cat' thread so haven't read the whole of this thread) - although your mention of wobble board and exercising have given me a bit of a clue - but if it helps you to talk about things, I'm here and I know a lot of other people are too.

Talking of cats - how are they all doing?

mellymoo74

Trinket/Tomcat is lovely had some wonderful cuddles

Picky is still the most adorable creature ever, she calls me whenever I leave the dogs for a love so she gets plenty.

Ty is a sod lol still stealing pickles spots and when I went in to love tom and pick last night also jumped up and stood on me so he got attention.

Kev is lovely he is also a cuddle bug he isn't here full time though.

I failed to attend yesterday
We got almost there, hit traffic and I had a meltdown

mellymoo74

Angry with myself so may disappear to lick wounds

heartbreak_star

Melly you've got to go eventually sweetheart

Much love and strength and positivity to you!

HBS x

mellymoo74

No I don't
No I don't

I have managed this since I was 7 and I'm not dead and I manage most of the time to be a functioning person
What if it makes.me worse
Plus I am tired.of telling people and seeing pity
Tired of it

surveyqueenuk

I have decided to "penguin" as you may not feel able to read this just yet. Please only read if you feel safe and there is no absolutely no need to reply.

PENGUIN

You are right, you don't have to go. Why should you? After all, you've been living like this for approx. 35 years (I am assuming you were born in '74). You can do another 35, right?

Except you won't. Melly, your heart will pack up if you carry on like this. I will be frank, there have been two occasions in the past year where you haven't posted for a couple of days and I've wondered if you had died. I feel sure I am not alone in this.

So you do have the option to let services simply mark you off as "refuses to engage". That's your choice and everyone here loves you regardless. But there is no control over being fed through a tube up your nose on a locked ward. There is even less when you are in the coffin.

END PENGUIN

heartbreak_star

Surveyqueen that says everything that I wanted to say but didn't know how.

HBS x

tunathe_cat

Hugs Melly Its just your 7 year old survivor who is throwing a wobbly no i cant do this! In her way she has kept you safe . But its now time to help her help you with the new methods . You as an adult have learnt and will be learning. It is ok to say No but baby steps As you say you have been dealing with this on your own. The new adult you has even engaged in this YOUR blog. Look at the people who have engaged and found help through your posts and others.

So deep breath big girl pants on and re book that appointment. You will not be the first that did not make it to this appointment. But YOU have made contact. Talk on here yes/no shall i attend. You even got transport sorted, got ready and started the journey. You even told us you never got to your destination x Well done you and your inner 7 year old - now hold hands with her give her a hug and together you can and will rebook. and complete this one journey. baby steps we will be with you in cyber land cheering you on. It will be the first of many new methods you will learn and through your blog teach us. xx



Furby hugs from mine to yours Very proud of you
Tuna the cat aka Andrea x

heartbreak_star

Melly, I hope you're OK and have taken time to reflect and lick your wounds

HBS x

mellymoo74

Love you Andrea and I don't say it often enough.

Feeling chill's

"Scar Tissue"

Scar tissue that I wish you saw
Sarcastic mister know it all
Close your eyes and I'll kiss you 'cause
With the birds I'll share
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view

Push me up against the wall
Young Kentucky girl in a push-up bra
Fallin' all over myself
To lick your heart and taste your health 'cause
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view...

Blood loss in a bathroom stall
Southern girl with a scarlet drawl
Wave good-bye to ma and pa 'cause
With the birds I'll share
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view

Soft spoken with a broken jaw
Step outside but not to brawl
Autumn's sweet we call it fall
I'll make it to the moon if I have to crawl and
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view...

Scar tissue that I wish you saw
Sarcastic mister know it all
Close your eyes and I'll kiss you 'cause
With the birds I'll share
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view...