What does he want? If anything

Ash__

My ex partner who used to control me and my kids was sent to prison 3 years ago for dealing.dugs.

I have two kids and after events I share custody with my mum. I live with my best friend and this weekend I've had the kids over, He knows I am not exactly flush with money, so he doesnt take rent off me only take some for bills and food.

Today, he organised for the kids an easter egg hunt and he lets them do anything they want. such as get all their toys in the lounge and make a mess like kids do.

He makes sure I never go without in anything I need. I was in hospital for a few days, He picked me up when I was discharged and he came to see me every day.

Some have said he is a genuinely a nice guy (Everyone I know says he is except with a few people he has recently fell out with) others say he is after something. Theres been chances for him to try something and he didn't. the most he has ever done is hug me when I am down.

Do you think he could have some alteria motive?

balletshoes

he's your best friend - so surely you know him well enough and long enough to know his character?

If he'd wanted to try anything on with you, would he not have had the opportunity to do so before now?

tiger_eyes

Have you asked him?

Ash__

balletshoes wrote: »

he's your best friend - so surely you know him well enough and long enough to know his character?

If he'd wanted to try anything on with you, would he not have had the opportunity to do so before now?

I do, but theres been alot of people saying that he is generous and friendly until you upset hima nd then he is nasty apparently.

I just wanted an outside perspective to see if there was anything I was missing.

balletshoes

Ash__ wrote: »

I do, but theres been alot of people saying that he is generous and friendly until you upset hima nd then he is nasty apparently.

I just wanted an outside perspective to see if there was anything I was missing.

but we don't know him - you do. I'm not sure that the perspective of people on an internet forum, none of whom know this guy, will be of any use to you.

Desecrated_Landscape

Excuse me for being skeptical but i'm not someone who approves strongly to a situation like this. Thinking outside the box your children could be his interest? By the way he is "providing" everything could be seen as he is grooming you and luring you into a false sense of security potentially with an ulterior motive on his mind.

marisco_2

Ash__ wrote: »

My ex partner who used to control me and my kids was sent to prison 3 years ago for dealing drugs.

I get the impression that previous life experiences with your ex, have made it hard for you to feel that you are a good judge of character of others. So when people raise concerns, genuine or not, about the person you are sharing a home with it sets alarms bells ringing. None of us know him so it is difficult for us to give you a balanced viewpoint.

You describe this guy as your best friend, and hopefully felt that you knew and trusted him enough, to be able to start sharing a home with him. From your descriptions he comes across as a thoughtful, generous and caring person who has your back and wants to help and support you. My advice is to talk to him about any worries or concerns you have. You may well find that he welcomes the chance to put your mind at ease. It would also give him an opportunity to open up to someone over any pressures he is under. That's what good friends do for each other after all.

jetplane

How long have you known your 'best friend'? Do the kids live with your mum and what does your mum think?

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Desecrated_Landscape wrote: »

Excuse me for being skeptical but i'm not someone who approves strongly to a situation like this. Thinking outside the box your children could be his interest? By the way he is "providing" everything could be seen as he is grooming you and luring you into a false sense of security potentially with an ulterior motive on his mind.

He could just be a good friend who happens to be male.

It has been known to happen; not every unmarried man who is good with kids is a child abuser in waiting. Most aren't, in fact.

Desecrated_Landscape

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

He could just be a good friend who happens to be male.

It has been known to happen; not every unmarried man who is good with kids is a child abuser in waiting. Most aren't, in fact.

He could be but i would be looking into his background a bit more if he was near my children. The last part of her post sounds like he has a dark side, so its best to be safe than sorry.

Mojisola

Ash__ wrote: »

I do, but theres been alot of people saying that he is generous and friendly until you upset hima nd then he is nasty apparently.

Have you ever seen him be nasty to anyone?