OS and arguments with OH

Tesco_points_addict

Hardup_Hester wrote: »

I also knit & sex things to sell at Christmas
We don't argue about money.

:eek:
My hubby would love it if i did that!!1:rotfl:

finlaybaby

Saving money is my hobby, though OH thinks it's hilarious. He doesn't grasp the concept of living frugally and chuckles at my frequent surfing of this site. This man used to spend £800 a month on socializing!

We enjoy discussing the tips found on here and burst out laughing in supermarkets when we see people taking "Andrex puppy!" amounts of plastic bags near the vegetables.

potsofmoney_(I_wish)

My OH leaves all the money stuff to me, which frustrates me at times as I'd like a bit of support ie I try to encourage him to save £2.00 coins but it's only me that does it. We have only just got out of debt and the arguments were mainly surrounding the stress that debt and money worries bring. I've also rediscovered baking which I find a real stress reliever from the kids. It's a life style that's definitely here to stay

I do find it time consuming as there was a time back in the day when I was completely out of control with money and it has been a very hard lesson to learn. I really enjoy it though and as a beginner I'm looking forward to being able to give more advice rather than just asking questions. This site is really an inspiration I mean I would never have found a pattern for sanitary pads without it (lol)!:rotfl:

Nova5

After reading this thread earlier, I asked my DH what he thought about converting to OS. What's OS? he replied Nevermind the fact that I had been going on for ages about it when I first discovered this board - shows how much he listens to me. In his defence he works long hours and at the moment I'm a SAHM - on mat leave til January.

However he is grateful about the money I'm saving our household. Used to spend £540-£560 monthly. Last month I did the grocery challenge and estimated £300 - came in just over £296 Hoping to get it down each month without shocking ourselves too much!

Finlaybaby - I have a 4 month old called Finlay

Elliesmum

Na - as long as he gets chips now and again and the odd takeaway lol

EM xx

Crazychik

Hi Halia

Saving your money for a babysitter is a great idea. It doesn't hurt anyone these days to have the "odd" night out! Im not a lover of going out, but when we make the effort, its a great night.

I always make lists anyway when it comes to shopping, lists for school, work, holiday, etc. After my depression, I find I forget things easily.

We have to shop on a budget. I was shopping on a budget and with a list long before OH came into my life. He was once a person who would happily spend £45 on a pair of jeans. :eek: He'd never shopped in £ shops nor car boots. Now - I cant get him away from those places! Ive even converted his mum into haggling for a better deal! And believe me, she is like Mrs Bouquet!

He supports me fully, and see's the logic behind it. We are always meal planning, well mainly me, as I interfer too much when he cooks, so he refuses to do it. We sit and discuss what meals to have. And supports me in any new dishes or baking I do/try.

I dont find it tiring or time consuming, Im always planning ahead, as to avoid it taking up my time, its part of our life now and something we've gotten use to. I think for us, we would be worse off if we didnt do the OS things we do now! Which would make the money situation even worse!

He gets frustrated with having no money, but due to his circumstances from his previous marriage, and what he has to pay out, its understandable. Only on the odd few occasions we have bickered. Ive learnt him how to budget more, and as long as the main essentials are paid for each week, there is no need to fret!

I think for anyone who can run the household, sort the bills, shop and live/eat healthy and still have money to play with, all deserve a pat on the back! Well done guys/gals - keep up the good work!

angelavdavis

Hiya,

Well my OH is definitely a convert but he wasn't originally - far from it!

It has taken at least a year of chipping to get through that tough skin!!!

I started the MSE ethic not long after we met so it has been fairly long standing. When I first met him, he was a compulsive shopper who ate convenience foods. But luckily, he's a Leo and home-cooked food is the secret! The reduced grocery budget was an additional bonus. He has gone from being a penny watcher who broke just-about-even every month to being able to save £500 every month!

Enough of my self-indulgence:D back to the questions:

DOes your OH support you in old style/ budgeting?

Yes but it took a while - its worth it though. I was always a gardener - so he got used to the compost making and veg growing early on.

Deos it affect your relationship?

Positively now, I thought originally he would think I was a batty mare!

Do you find it tiring/ time consuming?

Yes, I spend many of my precious Sundays batch cooking (I work and live away from home probably about 40% of my life, so in order to maintain the OS saving, meals have to be in the freezer for OH when I am away).

Do you argue more or less about money?

We never really argued as were neither really strapped - I had debts but luckily earned sufficient to get those under control with a little belt-tightening, but my OH isn't as highly strung about money as he once was. He also thinks seriously about spending money too.

Queenie

Angelraesunshine wrote: »

.....
wish he realised though that last month my 1st month of doing this i managed to save enough OS to pay the car tax £200 without going over drawn which were every month paying out savings to cover it before i started this OS living.

Absolutely brilliant!! :j Well done to you :T :T :beer:

Queenie

halia wrote: »

oh we're okay with the 'big' planning - but daily lists etc he hates. Hey moanymoany I've done NLP training too!

I think if I aim for saving up for big things it will help us both realise that its a good thing. It does take up more time because prior to this we'd do alot of 'impulse' shopping or takeouts. I'm not a brilliant cook so at the moment I can't say homemade tastes better!

We argue about money a bit and household stuff ALOT!!!! The aim of OS for me is twofold; first to cut down on waste/ chemicals / additives etc secondly to prove to OH that we can live on far less cash so that he will consider giving up his job to go back to uni. (i'd rather be happy and poor than have a good income but him be as depressed as he is all the time right now)

:think: Does he need to be involved in your daily lists? If he doesn't like them, maybe rethinking his involvement with them would help?

Your cooking will improve the more you do it and the move confident you become at tweaking other recipes and experimenting with various herbs, spices and flavouring. You'll soon be able to see a difference and feel a (deserved) sense of pride at your achievements

I'm glad you mentioned about the Uni bit - now *there's* a fantastic goal to aim for, if it's what he wants too.

I do think in some ways you are in a catch 22 scenario - he's depressed, which by definition means he can't be as optimistic as you'd like him to be. Has he been to the GP for his depression? (Or, like many men, believes it'll lift of it's own accord?)

I think Old Styling can seem very time consuming when you are making such life style changes, but like the cooking, the more you do it, the more of a routine you get into and things slot into place. I think I've been OS all my life, but as life changes and the household changes it always means readjustments so I'm still learning, still adapting and ... still writing/printing lists :rotfl: (shopping mainly but age has something to do with it too, if I didn't have reminders, I wouldn't remember )

overlykeensaver

We were quite OS before we visited this site but have definitely become more since that fateful day!

My OH loves collecting the £2 after collecting for 6 months paid for all our spending money for a weeks holiday (we are doing it again for Christmas).

the one thing he does object to is when I use his old underpants as dusters - it really offends him!

I don't find it time consuming because I don't consider it a waste of time - instead of watching TV as soon as get in from work, I cook a meal - I don't feel as if I am "missing out" at all.