Charity donations instead of christening gifts?

mrsrolfie

Sorry for not replying to some of these messages. I know it was months ago. After several messages of support I forgot to check back for more messages. I appreciate the constructive ones! Nice to know that I am considered 'rude' for wanting to donate to terminally ill children.
Yes we did anticipate a lot of gifts so that's why we asked for charity donations. God and grandparents still gave gifts at their request, as did we, so my deprived daughter still has some lovely keepsakes of her christening day while we raised £300 for the local hospice and local childrens hospital. They were very grateful indeed.

mrsrolfie

themull1 wrote: »

I would hate being forced to give to a charity rather than buy something. Do people not just put money in a card anyway? and presents you get, you can put in the loft and keep for when your child is older.

My loft is horrible and damp and no room in there anyway. Plus any toys given would be age appropriate I imagine. I think it would be rude to ask for gifts to suit her in 10 years' time. But thank you for the suggestion. I'll keep it in mind for baby number 2 x

tooties

I think what you did was a great idea.

Regards

Kaye1

I think it was lovely too. Teach your children that is isn't all about 'things' and 'possessions,' but helping others is important too.

Kynthia

It's nice to have charity donations as an option. I know keepsakes are lovely but when virtually every guest brings one it's hard to store them all for years and remember who they're from. My daughter got two bangles, two tea sets, a necklace, a money box, some ornaments and other things I can't remember. A few bought books and cuddly toys that could be used now but they were the minority. I certainly didn't ask for every guest to bring a gift or send out a list, but people do tend to bring one.

themull1

mrsrolfie wrote: »

Sorry for not replying to some of these messages. I know it was months ago. After several messages of support I forgot to check back for more messages. I appreciate the constructive ones! Nice to know that I am considered 'rude' for wanting to donate to terminally ill children.
Yes we did anticipate a lot of gifts so that's why we asked for charity donations. God and grandparents still gave gifts at their request, as did we, so my deprived daughter still has some lovely keepsakes of her christening day while we raised £300 for the local hospice and local childrens hospital. They were very grateful indeed.

Your guests raised the money not you. Its rude to ask for either presents or donations. If people want to donate to a charity of their choice at some point, thats their choice, but they shouldn't have been forced into it for your christening.

notanewuser

Forced? Seriously?!

mrsrolfie

No one was forced into anything. We put a note in with the invites saying we were so thankful for a healthy beautiful baby girl who has everything she needs and if people were thinking of bringing a gift please could they donate instead. I wouldn't dream of asking for presents but everyone I know, when they go to a christening takes a gift, like you would do to a wedding.
In fact, a lot of people thanked us for making it much simpler for them. And some people alone gave £30 in their card - if they'd felt forced they would have given much less. We also had a 'post box' so people could anonymously donate, not everyone put money in cards and just put it in there so if they didn't agree, they didn't have to donate anything.
We also made a donation as well as getting her a gift.

sulphate

themull1 wrote: »

Your guests raised the money not you. Its rude to ask for either presents or donations. If people want to donate to a charity of their choice at some point, thats their choice, but they shouldn't have been forced into it for your christening.

I don't understand this absurd attitude regarding presents on this forum. People often buy gifts for christenings, much like weddings, and do it because they want to, not because they are "forced".

I bought a money box for a friend's daughter's christening a couple of years ago. It was gratefully received but I do wonder how many other people bought her similar things. I would have been just as happy to give a charitable donation. It's actually much easier to be told or given an idea of what the people in question want rather than guessing, if you are going to buy a present anyway.

Person_one

Thing is, technically it is rude to ask for presents/money. I know your intentions were good, but really you shouldn't have mentioned gifts or cash at all when you were inviting people to the christening. "Come to our party, bring money" is not great really!

The way to do it, is to let people decide for themselves if they want to give your baby a present, and if they ask you for ideas or what you'd like them to get then feel free to tell them but its only ever a suggestion.