Husband Wants to Invest Money In Business for Son

paddy's_mum

I would not be risking my hard earned money on this venture until and unless your son proved his worth by taking over most of the running of the household, garden, car washing etc. A washing machine, a dirty sink, the use of a mop and bucket isn't rocket science and is surely the least someone can do in return for having everything provided.

I note you mention that he is clean - always showered and wearing clean clothes - BUT who cleans the bathroom and launders the clothes? I'd bet money that it isn't him.

I can promise you that absolutely nothing will change until you stop treating him like an overgrown toddler who needs his Mummy to protect him.

Quite apart from anything else, YOU are fostering resentment and (your choice of word) hate between your children. Don't you think a re-think about the way your household operates might be a good idea before throwing away many thousands of pounds on a three legged racehorse and a gamble that is destined to fail?

What do you think it will do to the relationship between the siblings if you go ahead and lose this money?

Did you truly not grasp that your son himself is uneasy about the way you over-indulge him and told you so? What aspect of your parenting style did you consider and change as a result of his comment?

You owe it to a future daughter in law to stop wiping his very backside for him. You are doing him grave disservice by going on as you are...

paddy's_mum

tesuhoha wrote: »

As for my son he asked me to pay £10 into his account this month so he could pay his phone bill. He gave me the cash and I gave it back to him as it was his last £10. and he said to me you have to stop doing that and be tough with me to make me want to look for work.

This ^^^^^^

FatVonD

tesuhoha wrote: »

I don't know about that but he is looking on job sites atm and last night was working on his cv. Personally, I would rather he got a job and I hope the lack of money will motivate him. I paid his phone bill because he does need it to look for work.

The supermarkets will advertise on their own website rather than instore, some shopping centres have their own websites too.


I sympathise with your husband a little because I would want to do whatever it took to help my son too but the fact that you've gone from it being a business idea you needed to act on quick before everyone else did to now saying there are already too many people doing it makes me think it's a bad idea even if you take your son out of the equation.

If he's into music is there a sound tech course he could do? One of my exes did this as a mature student and is now the stage manager for a touring music show.

jenhug

tesuhoha wrote: »

He was brought up in a cigarette free household. I have never smoked and my husband gave up 30 years ago. He started smoking as he is in a band and they do a lot of pub gigs.

He has 5 A-C GCSEs which include English and Maths. Not impressive considering he went to a grammar school would you believe but he mucked about. (Private primary school). He watches documentaries and reads physics books for pleasure but when I suggest he studies for higher education he doesn't want to know. He has some ICT qualifications from courses he has been on.

He has actually applied for shelf stacking jobs but has not got them.

Probably because its hard work and you need to be enthusiastic and motivated!

I am, in all honesty shocked at how laid back his parents are regarding his lack of work over the years!

I had a full time job at 16, and made redundant just before I turned 17. My Mum provided me with a pen and paper and a yellow pages (pre internet) and I was expected to find myself a new job. I had a new full time job within 2 weeks. Being out of work was not an option for me.

Turf his lazy backside at 8 am every morning and get him actively searching for a real job!